# Eve, I'm sorry I can't read your book
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eve-im-sorry-i-cant-read-your-book/389425
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Created:** [January 25, 2007, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eve-im-sorry-i-cant-read-your-book/389425 "2007-01-25T17:14:59Z")
**Posts on this page:** 18
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Encinitas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Encinitas)
#### Post date: [January 25, 2007, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eve-im-sorry-i-cant-read-your-book/389425/1 "2007-01-25T17:14:59Z")
I ordered [Vamp](http://www.amazon.com/Vamp-Rise-Fall-Theda-Bara/dp/1879511320/sr=1-1/qid=1169745241/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/002-8705006-7777665?ie=UTF8&s=books) from Amazon. It arrived yesterday in a plastic bag, soaking wet and reaking of wine. Somebody needs to lay off the sauce.
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### Author:  [@phall0106](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phall0106)
#### Post date: [January 25, 2007, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eve-im-sorry-i-cant-read-your-book/389425/2 "2007-01-25T17:56:21Z")
[QUOTE=Encinitas]
soaking wet and reaking of wine.
[/QUOTE]
Isn’t that how it’s \*supposed \* to arrive?
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### Author:  [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)
#### Post date: [January 25, 2007, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eve-im-sorry-i-cant-read-your-book/389425/3 "2007-01-25T17:58:06Z")
Reality books!
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### Author:  [@Encinitas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Encinitas)
#### Post date: [January 25, 2007, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eve-im-sorry-i-cant-read-your-book/389425/4 "2007-01-25T17:58:09Z")
Now you tell me. ☹
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### Author:  [@MonkeyMule](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MonkeyMule)
#### Post date: [January 25, 2007, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eve-im-sorry-i-cant-read-your-book/389425/5 "2007-01-25T18:01:34Z")
[QUOTE=phall0106]
Isn’t that how it’s \*supposed \* to arrive?
[/QUOTE]
Not really, if I remember correctly Eve is allergic to alcohol.
Yes, god does love to punish us so.
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### Author:  [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)
#### Post date: [January 25, 2007, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eve-im-sorry-i-cant-read-your-book/389425/6 "2007-01-25T18:04:11Z")
[QUOTE=phall0106]
Isn’t that how it’s \*supposed \* to arrive?
[/QUOTE]
No, that’s how \*\*EVE \*\*is supposed to arrive. Or was that “come”? I must check the ancient scrolls…
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### Author:  [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)
#### Post date: [January 25, 2007, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eve-im-sorry-i-cant-read-your-book/389425/7 "2007-01-25T18:22:00Z")
Wow, I never realized what Eve actually [looked like.](http://www.evegolden.com/) Based on her areas of expertise, I can see her as one of those talking heads on those TV specials about celebrities you see on cable and such.
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### Author:  [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)
#### Post date: [January 25, 2007, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eve-im-sorry-i-cant-read-your-book/389425/8 "2007-01-25T18:31:03Z")
Oh, wait, she already has. I should read these websites instead of just looking at the purty pictures. (And, as she points out on her website, there’s also a doctor with the same name as her.)
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### Author:  [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)
#### Post date: [January 25, 2007, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eve-im-sorry-i-cant-read-your-book/389425/9 "2007-01-25T18:31:07Z")
[QUOTE=mobo85]
Wow, I never realized what Eve actually [looked like.](http://www.evegolden.com/)
[/QUOTE]
Huh. For some reason, I’ve always pictured **Eve** as a blonde.
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### Author:  [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)
#### Post date: [January 25, 2007, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eve-im-sorry-i-cant-read-your-book/389425/10 "2007-01-25T18:35:37Z")
Wet and wine soaked? That is not how one arrives! Nor does one come that way either. From personal experience I know that Eve always arrives looking and smelling fantastic.
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### Author:  [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)
#### Post date: [January 25, 2007, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eve-im-sorry-i-cant-read-your-book/389425/11 "2007-01-25T18:47:06Z")
[QUOTE=Biggirl]
Wet and wine soaked? That is not how one arrives!
[/QUOTE]
Decent way to leave, though.
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### Author:  [@Encinitas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Encinitas)
#### Post date: [January 25, 2007, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eve-im-sorry-i-cant-read-your-book/389425/12 "2007-01-25T18:51:34Z")
> [@](#):
>
> Decent way to leave, though.
Snort!
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### Author:  [@Oslo\_Ostragoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oslo_Ostragoth)
#### Post date: [January 26, 2007, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eve-im-sorry-i-cant-read-your-book/389425/13 "2007-01-26T00:56:21Z")
[QUOTE=Encinitas]
I ordered [Vamp](http://www.amazon.com/Vamp-Rise-Fall-Theda-Bara/dp/1879511320/sr=1-1/qid=1169745241/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/002-8705006-7777665?ie=UTF8&s=books) from Amazon. It arrived yesterday in a plastic bag, soaking wet and reaking of wine. Somebody needs to lay off the sauce.
[/QUOTE]
Really, or did I get whooshed?
I checked to see if she drowned while drunk, but not so.
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### Author:  [@Annie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie)
#### Post date: [January 26, 2007, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eve-im-sorry-i-cant-read-your-book/389425/14 "2007-01-26T02:53:52Z")
Holy Shit! Eve looks like my grandma (before grandma got old, of course)
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### Author:  [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)
#### Post date: [January 26, 2007, 5:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eve-im-sorry-i-cant-read-your-book/389425/15 "2007-01-26T05:44:48Z")
This has got to be the most ill-behaved\*\* Eve\*\*centric thread ever. She’s gonna bust in here soon and unleash a can o’ somethin’ on us all! And she’ll not even chip a nail.
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### Author:  [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)
#### Post date: [January 26, 2007, 6:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eve-im-sorry-i-cant-read-your-book/389425/16 "2007-01-26T06:04:58Z")
I have read (I think) all of Eve’s books, and Vamp is my favorite. So I urge you to insist on a replacement.
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### Author:  [@Encinitas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Encinitas)
#### Post date: [January 26, 2007, 6:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eve-im-sorry-i-cant-read-your-book/389425/17 "2007-01-26T06:16:19Z")
Amazon informs me that the replacement is on its way. I was very temped to start reading the soused version but it made my head spin!
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### Author:  [@Encinitas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Encinitas)
#### Post date: [January 26, 2007, 6:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eve-im-sorry-i-cant-read-your-book/389425/18 "2007-01-26T06:36:57Z")
[QUOTE=Oslo Ostragoth]
Really, or did I get whooshed?
I checked to see if she drowned while drunk, but not so.
[/QUOTE]
Yes, really. The post office delivered my Amazon order in a plastic bag. They said it arrived at the local office that way. When I opened the bag the Amazon shipping box and all its contents were sopping wet and reeking of wine. I couldn’t tell the vintage though.