# Ever hear of a Tom Swiftie? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 26, 2004, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650 "2004-03-26T23:27:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![SiXSwordS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@SiXSwordS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SiXSwordS)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650/1 "2004-03-26T23:27:15Z")
A Tom Swiftie is a kind of pun, they used to have them in “Boy’s Life” magazine. Anyway, a good example is, “I’m going upstairs!” Tom said, condescendingly. Anyone know of any others? ---
**Author:** ![jackelope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a6a055/32.png) [@jackelope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackelope)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650/2 "2004-03-26T23:34:18Z")
I love these! “Don’t reach into the lion’s cage,” Tom said offhandedly. ---
**Author:** ![BraheSilver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecccb3/32.png) [@BraheSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BraheSilver)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650/3 "2004-03-26T23:41:34Z")
I always liked “‘That scale’s building up on my shower head again,’ Tom said recalcitrantly.” ---
**Author:** ![Zabali\_Clawbane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/ecd19e/32.png) [@Zabali\_Clawbane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zabali_Clawbane)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650/4 "2004-03-26T23:42:48Z")
“I’m going to be a father!” Tom said patronizingly. /hijack Does anyone remember that “comic strip” that was in Boy’s Life about the human that was kidnapped to be a slave to tripedal, three armed, three eyed(?) overweight green aliens that had to get around on anti-gravity machines because they could barely wallk? I LOVED that strip, and would like to see if there are any collections of it available. I don’t even remember the strip’s name though. ☹ hijack/ Yeah, I’d swipe my kid brother’s Boy’s Life magazines to read the comic first if I got the chance. I read most of the magazine too, I’m a “tomboy”. ---
**Author:** ![jackelope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a6a055/32.png) [@jackelope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackelope)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650/5 "2004-03-26T23:46:05Z")
> [@Zabali\_Clawbane](#): > > Does anyone remember that “comic strip” that was in Boy’s Life about the human that was kidnapped to be a slave to tripedal, three armed, three eyed(?) overweight green aliens that had to get around on anti-gravity machines because they could barely wallk? I LOVED that strip, and would like to see if there are any collections of it available. I don’t even remember the strip’s name though. The strip, I think, was called “The Tripods.” Actually I’m not sure about the strip, but it was based on a series of [books](http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/068900852X/qid=1080344640/sr=2-1/ref=sr_2_1/103-0510041-8291010) about the Tripods by John Christopher. I loved those books when I was a kid, and also his post-apocalyptic series about the Burning Lands (or something like that). ---
**Author:** ![Kizarvexius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/da6949/32.png) [@Kizarvexius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kizarvexius)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650/6 "2004-03-26T23:47:53Z")
Tom stormed in, drenched from the sudden downpour, and thundered “I hate lightning storms!” Jerry agreed, and darkly added that the lights had been out for hours. “Oh, don’t flood me with your complaints,” Tom sputtered. “At least you had a roof over your head!” “Yes, I was wise enough to read the weather forcast this morning” Jerry added dryly. ---
**Author:** ![Kizarvexius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/da6949/32.png) [@Kizarvexius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kizarvexius)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650/7 "2004-03-26T23:49:50Z")
That strip you’re talking about was a trilogy of three books. _The White Mountains The City of Gold and Lead The Pool of Fire_ Great stuff. The strip was very loyal to the books, as I recall. ---
**Author:** ![SiXSwordS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@SiXSwordS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SiXSwordS)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650/8 "2004-03-26T23:50:46Z")
“Quick your hijacking and drop those box cutter’s.” Tom said, terrorizingly. a strech, I know, but I had to take back my thread. ---
**Author:** ![Kizarvexius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/da6949/32.png) [@Kizarvexius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kizarvexius)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650/9 "2004-03-26T23:51:11Z")
Trilogy of three books. Duh… Must…make…preview…my…friend! ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650/10 "2004-03-26T23:51:53Z")
“My girlfriend fell offthe back of my motorcycle!” Tom said ruthlessly. ---
**Author:** ![Interrobang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/interrobang/32/17463_2.png) [@Interrobang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Interrobang)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650/11 "2004-03-26T23:54:19Z")
“We don’t have any flowers in our garden,” Tom said lackadaisically. ---
**Author:** ![samclem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@samclem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samclem)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650/12 "2004-03-26T23:54:36Z")
Just for context, this fad started in about 1962-1963. Some vintage ones, just for the old farts. “I’m getting married again, said Gov. Rockefeller, happily.” “To whom, said Prince Ranier, gracefully.” “Everything is A-OK said NASA, initially.” ---
**Author:** ![Zabali\_Clawbane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/ecd19e/32.png) [@Zabali\_Clawbane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zabali_Clawbane)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650/13 "2004-03-27T00:01:11Z")
Bingo! [Boys Life and the Tripods](http://www.users.voicenet.com/~swyss/comics.html) Thank you! I’d been wanting to find those for years. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Shade](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2bfe46/32.png) [@Shade](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shade)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650/14 "2004-03-27T00:09:19Z")
There was a whole page of these I found a while back. I saved a couple of my favorites: “Pass me the shellfish,” said Tom crabbily. “Let’s look for another Grail!” Tom requested. “I used to be a pilot,” Tom explained. “I’m into homosexual necrophilia,” said Tom in dead earnest. ---
**Author:** ![MLS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/919ad9/32.png) [@MLS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MLS)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650/15 "2004-03-27T01:02:16Z")
“I dropped the toothpaste,” said Tom, crestfallen. ---
**Author:** ![quiltguy154](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/ad7895/32.png) [@quiltguy154](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/quiltguy154)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650/16 "2004-03-27T01:12:42Z")
" I’m not Dennis," Tom said menacingly. “Call the glazier right away”, Tom said glassy-eyed. “I’m from Oklahoma”, added Tom sooner. ---
**Author:** ![furt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/439d5e/32.png) [@furt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furt)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650/17 "2004-03-27T01:19:44Z")
> [@Interrobang!?](#): > > “We don’t have any flowers in our garden,” Tom said lackadaisically. “Take some of mine,” he said morosely. ---
**Author:** ![furt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/439d5e/32.png) [@furt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furt)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650/18 "2004-03-27T01:25:26Z")
> [@Shade](#): > > “I’m into homosexual necrophilia,” said Tom in dead earnest. There’s beer on my monitor thanks to this. ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650/19 "2004-03-27T01:34:14Z")
> [@SiXSwordS](#): > > Anyway, a good example is, “I’m going upstairs!” Tom said, condescendingly. It’s a good example if you tell it right: “The prisoner is going downstairs,” said Tom condescendingly. Make no sense if you go upstairs, and you need to identify what “con” refers go. I lean toward swifties without adverbs: “I don’t like this fish,” Tom carped. “I’m coming,” Tom ejaculated. ---
**Author:** ![Dragwyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dragwyr/32/2855_2.png) [@Dragwyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dragwyr)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650/20 "2004-03-27T02:12:35Z")
“I think I’ll go wash the dishes,” Tom said with joy. “I need my coat,” Tom said coldly. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-hear-of-a-tom-swiftie/236650.md?page=2)