# Ever tied up your spouse (or S/O)? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 20, 2003, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437 "2003-08-20T14:16:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437/1 "2003-08-20T14:16:02Z")
I tied my wife up last night at her request. Nothing serious - I cut up a t-shirt and lashed her to the headboard loosely enough that she could slip her hands out easily. I don’t regard this as all that kinky, but what do I know? Do we need an **Official SDMB Bondage Dungeon**? ---
**Author:** ![lost4life](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c4cdca/32.png) [@lost4life](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lost4life)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437/2 "2003-08-20T14:37:22Z")
The best **BDSM** is **SDMB BDSM**! It’s been discussed a bit round these parts. I’d do a search for links, but I’m feeling dominant and figured I’ll make someone else do it 😉 ---
**Author:** ![plnnr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@plnnr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/plnnr)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437/3 "2003-08-20T14:42:37Z")
Untie? I gotta run…I forgot something… ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437/4 "2003-08-20T14:49:21Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by plnnr \* > \*\*Untie? > > I gotta run…I forgot something… \*\* 😃 “My wife? Yes, yes. She’s the pretty lady by the Ice Sculpture with the headboard handcuffed to her wrist.” ---
**Author:** ![Rune](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e68b1a/32.png) [@Rune](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rune)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437/5 "2003-08-20T15:15:46Z")
Hello Winston Smith, Your wife? That would be Julia right? Was O’Brien in any way involved? Aw, I just realized we have the same name ☹ – and you were here before me (2 months) ☹ , funny I never saw you before. Guess I’ll have to change my name now – is that possible? Rune ---
**Author:** ![Rashak\_Mani](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ea666f/32.png) [@Rashak\_Mani](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rashak_Mani)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437/6 "2003-08-20T15:26:15Z")
hehe… its great tying the GF up and then “abusing” her a bit. She likes it and unfortunately has become quite skilled at untying her hands from the badly done knots I make. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437/7 "2003-08-20T16:06:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by WinstonSmith \* > \*\*Hello Winston Smith, > > Your wife? That would be Julia right? Was O’Brien in any way involved? > > Aw, I just realized we have the same name ☹ – and you were here before me (2 months) ☹ , funny I never saw you before. Guess I’ll have to change my name now – is that possible? > > Rune \*\* Heh-heh. My sources told me about you months and months ago, and I’ve been watching you. :eek: Seriously, though, if you’d like to change your user name, send an email to a Moderater, and they’ll get you fixed up. Are you taking suggestions? How about **Big Brother**? Then we can be _fierce rivals_… ---
**Author:** ![jeevmon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/87869e/32.png) [@jeevmon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jeevmon)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437/8 "2003-08-20T16:35:11Z")
I think light bondage has taken the same trajectory as oral sex: something that was previously considered kinky and slightly deviant but is now considered a healthy and normal part of human sexual relations. I mean, there were handcuffs in the bedroom in “My So-Called Life” and Chandler was handcuffed to a chair on one episode of “Friends”, and I would suspect that many sexually active women have a pair of handcuffs somewhere, whether purchased or acquired. So, tying your partner up was kinky once upon a time, but now it’s kind of vanilla. Vanilla, on the other hand, is kinky when properly used . . . 😃 ---
**Author:** ![sidle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee59a6/32.png) [@sidle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sidle)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437/9 "2003-08-20T16:58:58Z")
Yeah. Spent an extra 10 minutes messing with my hair when he was ready to go. Boy was he pissed! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437/10 "2003-08-20T17:03:05Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by sidle \* > \*\*Yeah. > > Spent an extra 10 minutes messing with my hair when he was ready to go. > > Boy was he pissed! > > 😉 \*\* 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Phatlewt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a698b9/32.png) [@Phatlewt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phatlewt)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437/11 "2003-08-20T18:14:27Z")
Fun! Not exactly vanilla as **jeevmon** suggests, but definately seems to be more common and accepted by men and women alike. I think I like the trend of “kinky” things becoming more normal over time 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437/12 "2003-08-20T19:11:50Z")
I’ve done it twice at my partners request both times and never really saw the point in it. I just didn’t find it sexy. But I’m certainly not trying to tell anyone else what is acceptable for them, just how I felt about it. ---
**Author:** ![Gorgon\_Heap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f475e1/32.png) [@Gorgon\_Heap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorgon_Heap)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437/13 "2003-08-20T19:35:39Z")
**Winston Smith Mark I** , I think **sidle** meant her husband was tied up, ready to make a go of it, while she sat in the bathroom toying with her hair. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437/14 "2003-08-21T01:09:02Z")
Never noticed that SDMB is an anagram of BSDM… ---
**Author:** ![ladyfoxfyre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ad7895/32.png) [@ladyfoxfyre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ladyfoxfyre)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437/15 "2003-08-21T04:07:55Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jeevmon \* > \*\*[snip]I would suspect that many sexually active women have a pair of handcuffs somewhere, whether purchased or acquired.[/snip] > \*\* I _had_ a pair of handcuffs, now my stupid ex has them. I should ask him to send them back, something like “I have found a new and interesting use for those handcuffs I bought for us. Actually the use is still the same, they’re just with a new and interesting partner.” Hey that was really good. -foxy ---
**Author:** ![whistlepig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/73ab20/32.png) [@whistlepig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whistlepig)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437/16 "2003-08-21T04:36:16Z")
I have velcro handcuffs. I earned college credit putting people into handcuffs. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437/17 "2003-08-21T04:51:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by ladyfoxfyre \* > \*\*I _had_ a pair of handcuffs, now my stupid ex has them. I should ask him to send them back, something like “I have found a new and interesting use for those handcuffs I bought for us. Actually the use is still the same, they’re just with a new and interesting partner.” > Hey that was really good. > -foxy \*\* Can I volunteer to do the cuffing? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437/18 "2003-08-21T04:53:53Z")
Two women I went out with in college were both really into being blindfolded and tied up, and also enjoyed returning the action (I also found it quite fun). My wife, unfortunately, doesn’t like it. I bought a pair of handcuffs, but they were the metal ones that left bruises even when fastened loosely, so we normally stuck with strips of cloth. I left the cuffs behind after graduation, and heard later from one of the security guards that they had to be called in to free some nitwit student on the cleaning crew who found them and tried to play Houdini. ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437/19 "2003-08-21T05:40:21Z")
Used a scarf. Fortunately it’s long enough that I can do her hands up individually. She’s much more into it than I am, but her being into it then gets me into it. I’m into talking more’n she is, so it averages out. [sub]Why I tell you people these things…[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Cosmopolitan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/94ad74/32.png) [@Cosmopolitan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cosmopolitan)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 5:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437/20 "2003-08-21T05:44:15Z")
I have a pair of metal cuffs that you can “lock” by flipping a small lever on each cuff: I bought them to complete my college sophomore-year Halloween costume (a dominatrix) & decided to keep them because they turned out to be fun. I’ve always been the bound, though. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ever-tied-up-your-spouse-or-s-o/196437.md?page=2)