# Everyone On Earth Will Want To See This Movie (Now With Added Snakes on a Plane!) **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 16, 2006, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992 "2006-06-16T21:01:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2006, 5:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992/41 "2006-06-18T05:08:58Z")
Well, if we’re going to do this, we may as well go all-out and set it in the Askewniverse. ---
**Author:** ![Miss\_Purl\_McKnittington](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9a140/32.png) [@Miss\_Purl\_McKnittington](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miss_Purl_McKnittington)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2006, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992/42 "2006-06-18T05:26:00Z")
[QUOTE=vaderspal] You forgot **JThunder** ’s Pixar requirement. I second that, especially because so far I’m very much not interested in this film. But if Pixar is involved, I’d _have_ to see it. [/QUOTE] Well, shoot. Maybe if it was based on a Jane Austen novel ghost-written by Raymond Feist? ---
**Author:** ![devilsknew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4da419/32.png) [@devilsknew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/devilsknew)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2006, 8:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992/43 "2006-06-18T08:51:41Z")
Not enough Cowbell. I will see just about anything if Chris Walken is in it… He’s the thinking man’s Sam Jackson. ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2006, 9:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992/44 "2006-06-18T09:45:42Z")
[QUOTE=don’t ask] Look I’m sorry I’m just not getting this could you give me the logline? Say: An obsessive-compulsive messiah, a quirky swordsman, and a talented team of cheerleaders join together for a heist in a Broadway theatre during an earthquake. [/QUOTE] Wow! When’s it coming out? ---
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2006, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992/45 "2006-06-18T13:58:10Z")
Maybe the angels could be giant robots? ---
**Author:** ![vibrotronica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a9a28c/32.png) [@vibrotronica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vibrotronica)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2006, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992/46 "2006-06-18T16:22:22Z")
If Ewen McGregor plays Jesus, that will wrap up both the full frontal nudity and the bondage/torture scene. That will help us with our running time. What we’re missing here is a couple of hit songs for the soundtrack. We’ll need to contact Andre 3000, [Lordi](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lordi) and Shania Twain, just to cover all the bases. And maybe Amy Grant. Gotta get that Christian element in there. That just makes the marketing so much easier. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2006, 12:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992/47 "2006-06-19T12:24:03Z")
With all the people I know whose “Top Three” are Stephen King, Andrew Lloyd Webber, and The Simpsons, I think we have another writer, composer, and an animator to get working. ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2006, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992/48 "2006-06-19T13:10:46Z")
Pardon me, but where are the ninjas and the car chases? ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2006, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992/49 "2006-06-19T14:11:43Z")
Narration by Anthony Hopkins. ---
**Author:** ![Kizarvexius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/da6949/32.png) [@Kizarvexius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kizarvexius)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2006, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992/50 "2006-06-19T15:42:18Z")
For my part, I’d like to see somebody do a huge-scale epic production that was 100% faithful to the world shattering historical events / universally beloved literary work that it portrays. Because then maybe some of the nitpicky perfectionistic no-life counting-the-errors-frame-by-frame know-it-alls will understand what an excercise in tedium such a thing would be. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2006, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992/51 "2006-06-19T16:06:36Z")
And it’s got to have vampires. And cheerleaders. And aliens. And monkeys. ---
**Author:** ![Glassy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ea666f/32.png) [@Glassy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Glassy)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2006, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992/52 "2006-06-21T14:50:19Z")
[QUOTE=vibrotronica] … Shania Twain… [/QUOTE] Whoa, whoa, whoa. I was on board until Shania Twain irrupted into this discussion like a bad case of acne. Can we just see her and not hear her? She could just stand around in the background or something. She’d probably look good in a corset. But no lines, no songs, no sound out of her at all. Deal? ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2006, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992/53 "2006-06-21T15:08:37Z")
[QUOTE=Kizarvexius] For my part, I’d like to see somebody do a huge-scale epic production that was 100% faithful to the world shattering historical events / universally beloved literary work that it portrays. Because then maybe some of the nitpicky perfectionistic no-life counting-the-errors-frame-by-frame know-it-alls will understand what an excercise in tedium such a thing would be. [/QUOTE] Then we must insist on all fact-checking and continuity to be done by **Cecil.** ---
**Author:** ![GrizzRich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7ba0ec/32.png) [@GrizzRich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrizzRich)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2006, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992/54 "2006-06-21T15:18:29Z")
Also must include… -claymation by Nick Park -superheroes based on Stan Lee characters -a spit-take scene performed by Jim Carey -Jennifer Tilly in full vamp-mode. ---
**Author:** ![Encinitas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@Encinitas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Encinitas)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2006, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992/55 "2006-06-21T15:24:22Z")
Wha…no snakes? ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Hoopy\_Frood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hoopy_frood/32/8452_2.png) [@Hoopy\_Frood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hoopy_Frood)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2006, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992/56 "2006-06-21T15:36:39Z")
[QUOTE=Encinitas] Wha…no snakes? ☹ [/QUOTE] They’re all still stuck on the plane. ---
**Author:** ![Jurph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/50afbb/32.png) [@Jurph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jurph)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2006, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992/57 "2006-06-21T15:41:33Z")
[QUOTE=Cluricaun] Pardon me, but where are the ninjas and the car chases? [/QUOTE] They show up in the third act, sitting in for Roman Cavalry (whose horses are replaced with souped-up muscle cars in this modernization). ---
**Author:** ![Hampshire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hampshire/32/4887_2.png) [@Hampshire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hampshire)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2006, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992/58 "2006-06-21T16:03:18Z")
[QUOTE=Happy Clam] So…Snakes on a Plane. It’s got Samuel L. Jackson, so I will be seeing it, on principle. For me, these factors are: Samuel L. (motha **fuckin’** ) Jackson, Johnny Depp, comic book movies, pirates. If a film promises to have any one of those in it, I am contractually obliged to see it. [/QUOTE] So, did you enjoy the film **The Man**? I don’t know of anyone else who saw it. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2006, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992/59 "2006-06-21T16:40:01Z")
Y’know, I was thinking that no single element would be enough to get me to see a movie (though several of the things mentioned in combination would… If Whedon or Straczynski ever did anything with Pixar, I’d be **so** there), but then I got to this: > [@](#): > > But the space battle must have NO sound. And no banking. Yep, that’d do it. ---
**Author:** ![bat312](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c77e96/32.png) [@bat312](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bat312)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2006, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992/60 "2006-06-21T16:45:09Z")
The main character (Jesus?) does not remember who he is, but finds out that he has superior fighting abilities…and is dead. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-on-earth-will-want-to-see-this-movie-now-with-added-snakes-on-a-plane/360992.md?page=4)