# Everyone would be better off if you were gay, Argent Towers. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 21, 2005, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496 "2005-07-21T16:59:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496/1 "2005-07-21T16:59:20Z")
This MPSIMS thread,[I wish I was GAY](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=326504) is utter bullshit. Just because YOU do not know how to talk to women, doesn’t mean “men and women do not talk about the same things.” Just because you would like to fuck with no emotional commitment doesn’t mean all men would too. Do any woman you’d ever meet a favor and hire a hooker. Buy some lotion and some porn. Turn gay. Go fuck yourself. ---
**Author:** ![irishgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/8edcca/32.png) [@irishgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/irishgirl)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496/2 "2005-07-21T17:32:27Z")
dammit, the hamsters ate my post. **Argent Towers** have you considered that the reason why women are not falling on your dick left, right and centre is that because “no-strings” doesn’t equal “I have such low self-esteem that I will fuck someone who obviously holds me and my gender in contempt” in the minds of most women? You post comes off whiny, selfish and misogynisitic. You expect the world to work, exactly the way you want, for your benefit, without being willing to put anything back. Seriously; misogynistic, selfish, whiny assholes are not high on most women’s “men I must fuck today” list. Here’s how the world works. You give a little, you get a little. Nothing comes for free. For most people they give a little affection, respect or fun, they get a little sex. Even totally casual sex means giving your partner something in return, although you may not believe that. In your case, I think you’re better giving someone a little money, in return for sex. ---
**Author:** ![Ooner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/c67d28/32.png) [@Ooner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ooner)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496/3 "2005-07-21T17:38:48Z")
Dear Biggirl, Please no. We do not want this douchebag. You can keep him. -The Gays ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496/4 "2005-07-21T17:46:44Z")
Hey buddy, Us women don’t want him either. -The women who enjoy casual sex, but not with creeps. ---
**Author:** ![scout1222](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@scout1222](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scout1222)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496/5 "2005-07-21T17:47:17Z")
**Ooner** , that’s what I was thinking. We don’t want to send him over to the Other Side to torment them, too! ---
**Author:** ![malkavia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malkavia/32/5621_2.png) [@malkavia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/malkavia)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496/6 "2005-07-21T17:51:21Z")
Can we just hand him over to the straight men in an attempt to protect both women and gays from his asshatedness. All in favor? ---
**Author:** ![Who\_me\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/958977/32.png) [@Who\_me\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Who_me_1)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496/7 "2005-07-21T17:55:37Z")
I don’t think that **AG** wants or cares about anything besides someone to keep Mr. Happy amused. He apparently lacks normal communication skills and hasn’t an empathic bones in his body. As I stated in my response in the original thread, he probably couldn’t get laid if he were gay either… I mean most gays I know do have taste. 😉 At least it wasn’t the run-of-the-mill, “Women hate nice guys” rant… ---
**Author:** ![Elysian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c77e96/32.png) [@Elysian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elysian)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496/8 "2005-07-21T17:57:48Z")
[Here](http://www.realdoll.com/intro.asp) you go, bud, knock yourself out. These things will give up their plastic love for you – and they don’t eat or sleep or have emotions, either. Perfect for you. ---
**Author:** ![SnakesCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4af34b/32.png) [@SnakesCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SnakesCatLady)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496/9 "2005-07-21T17:59:05Z")
Why do I have the definite feeling, that if by some miracle he could find a fuck-buddy, she would discover he was lousy in bed? ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496/10 "2005-07-21T18:08:16Z")
Sorry for having tried to foist him off on gay people but, at least he doesn’t mind _talking_ to men. ---
**Author:** ![Licentious\_Ectomorph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/5e9695/32.png) [@Licentious\_Ectomorph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Licentious_Ectomorph)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496/11 "2005-07-21T18:09:06Z")
> [@Ooner](#): > > Dear Biggirl, > > Please no. We do not want this douchebag. You can keep him. > > -The Gays If he’s cute, I’ll take him. At least for an hour or so. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Wrong](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@Mr.Wrong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Wrong)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496/12 "2005-07-21T18:16:10Z")
> [@](#): > > The women who enjoy casual sex, but not with creeps. When’s that next meeting, again? ---
**Author:** ![Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496/13 "2005-07-21T18:16:57Z")
I don’t know about the rest of the straight guys here feel, but personally I love guys like **Argent Towers**. They’re such flaming, crude misogynistic slammers that when they’re around, it almost doesn’t matter what an asshole I feel like, all I have to do is look across the room and say “well, at least I’m not him”. And you know what? If sitting around a room full of men is more intellectually stimulating than hanging with a bunch of women, then dude, show me those men. I present you with the men’s room at any large sporting event where beer is sold. If I hear one more jackwipe walk in and scream “hey is this where all the dicks are hanging out?”, I’m going to go batshit. Try this **Argent** : Hold out your hand. Talk to it. It probably isn’t talking back. This apparently makes it your perfect sexual partner. Have at it. ---
**Author:** ![Trunk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/87869e/32.png) [@Trunk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trunk)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496/14 "2005-07-21T18:23:02Z")
Except for the part where he said, “you need to buy 'em dinner and compliment. . .and you still might not get laid” it was a pretty tame post. He didn’t hate women. He just said he didn’t interact well with them. And noted that he had to if he ever wanted to have sex. He didn’t even say they were shallow, but just that the way he interacted with them was shallow. He didn’t say that all gays were easy. Just that it was easier for a man to get laid if he was gay (does anyone want to seriously dispute that?) Basically, he just lamented, “it would be easy if I were gay. I could hang out with guys all night and then just fuck if we wanted too.” I mean, why do guys join Greek fraternities in college if not that very reason? ---
**Author:** ![wolfstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/d6d6ee/32.png) [@wolfstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfstu)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496/15 "2005-07-21T18:25:12Z")
> [@Trunk](#): > > He didn’t hate women. He just said he didn’t interact well with them. And noted that he had to if he ever wanted to have sex. He didn’t even say they were shallow, but just that the way he interacted with them was shallow. > > He didn’t say that all gays were easy. Just that it was easier for a man to get laid if he was gay (does anyone want to seriously dispute that?) > > Basically, he just lamented, “it would be easy if I were gay. I could hang out with guys all night and then just fuck if we wanted too.” That’s the point I made in the original thread. I’m hoping, when **Argent Towers** comes back, things will be cleared up to this effect. ---
**Author:** ![Trunk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/87869e/32.png) [@Trunk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trunk)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496/16 "2005-07-21T18:26:57Z")
> [@mr bus guy](#): > > If sitting around a room full of men is more intellectually stimulating than hanging with a bunch of women, then dude, show me those men. See, he didn’t say that either. It’s subtle, but there’s a difference. What he wrote was, “there is a real intellectual bond that is more powerful than anything I’ve ever felt with a girl”. And what he could MEAN was, “because my idea of intellectual bonding involves who has the most arcane knowledge of baseball statistics”. Because, that’s what I’d mean by it. ---
**Author:** ![Binarydrone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3da27b/32.png) [@Binarydrone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Binarydrone)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496/17 "2005-07-21T18:27:24Z")
> [@malkavia](#): > > Can we just hand him over to the straight men in an attempt to protect both women and gays from his asshatedness. > > All in favor? I think that solution may be a bit on the Darwinian side, but OK. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496/18 "2005-07-21T18:31:31Z")
Hey, ease up, guys. You know how hard it is to find a woman who considers a two hour rant about _The Phantom Menace_ to be foreplay? Take it from me: it ain’t easy! ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496/19 "2005-07-21T18:35:43Z")
It never ceases to amaze me. On this board, and in real life, there is no creature as reviled and loathed as the lonely man. Simply say “I wish I could talk to women without freezing up” and out come accusations of misogyny and selfishness, and suggestions that said lonely man go masturbate. It’s times like this when I’m not so proud to be a member of this board. ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496/20 "2005-07-21T18:38:17Z")
> [@Mr. Wrong](#): > > When’s that next meeting, again? Tuesday. There will be punch and pie. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everyone-would-be-better-off-if-you-were-gay-argent-towers/313496.md?page=2)