# Everything I Know About U.S. Culture, I Learned from "Cops." **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [January 14, 2008, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453 "2008-01-14T04:30:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453/1 "2008-01-14T04:30:41Z")
OK, not true at all. I’m a good neighbour and I’ve traveled extensively in the U.S. But I’m curious about other folks who have never been to the States and are watching Cops. What might you think is status quo? 1. Everyone who drives is drunk and has no valid license, nor insurance. 2. All males involved in domestic disputes have beer guts and do not wear shirts. ---
**Author:** ![Sprockets](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/35a633/32.png) [@Sprockets](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sprockets)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453/2 "2008-01-14T13:22:06Z")
[QUOTE=Leaffan] What might you think is status quo? Anyone who has a malfunctioning tail light also has multiple warrants and is driving drunk without a license. ---
**Author:** ![GaryM](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/garym/32/241_2.png) [@GaryM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GaryM)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453/3 "2008-01-14T13:46:16Z")
Folks with contraband in their cars regularly allow the police to search said car. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453/4 "2008-01-14T15:29:50Z")
Up until I started travelling, everything I knew about the USA I learned from the Buffalo TV stations: “A fire tonight in Tonawanda.” “A shooting tonight in Tonawanda.” “A fire tonight in Lackawanna” “A shooting tonight in Lackawanna” “A fire tonight in Cheektowaga.” “A shooting tonight in Cheektowaga.” It gave me the impression that Buffalo was a violent hole. Eventually I visited the place, and guess what? ---
**Author:** ![Rube\_E.Tewesday](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f0a364/32.png) [@Rube\_E.Tewesday](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rube_E.Tewesday)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453/5 "2008-01-14T15:38:27Z")
[QUOTE=Muffin] Up until I started travelling, everything I knew about the USA I learned from the Buffalo TV stations: “A fire tonight in Tonawanda.” “A shooting tonight in Tonawanda.” “A fire tonight in Lackawanna” “A shooting tonight in Lackawanna” “A fire tonight in Cheektowaga.” “A shooting tonight in Cheektowaga.” It gave me the impression that Buffalo was a violent hole. Eventually I visited the place, and guess what? [/QUOTE] Were you held up by a pistol-packin’ punk? ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453/6 "2008-01-14T15:42:34Z")
American police officers are unfailingly polite and professional, never swear or use excessive force, and catch everyone who attempts to flee from them. ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453/7 "2008-01-14T15:45:20Z")
[QUOTE=Leaffan] 2) All males involved in domestic disputes have beer guts and do not wear shirts. [/QUOTE] Except the tweekers. Bare chested maybe, beer guts - not so much ---
**Author:** ![Sprockets](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/35a633/32.png) [@Sprockets](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sprockets)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453/8 "2008-01-14T17:36:30Z")
[QUOTE=Muffin] Eventually I visited the place, and guess what? [/QUOTE] Been there. Don’t need to guess! ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453/9 "2008-01-14T17:38:54Z")
[QUOTE=Muffin] Up until I started travelling, everything I knew about the USA I learned from the Buffalo TV stations: “A fire tonight in Tonawanda.” “A shooting tonight in Tonawanda.” “A fire tonight in Lackawanna” “A shooting tonight in Lackawanna” “A fire tonight in Cheektowaga.” “A shooting tonight in Cheektowaga.” It gave me the impression that Buffalo was a violent hole. Eventually I visited the place, and guess what? [/QUOTE] Come to Detroit and we’ll show what a violent hole really is! ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453/10 "2008-01-14T17:46:13Z")
[QUOTE=Shirley Ujest] Come to Detroit and we’ll show what a violent hole really is! [/QUOTE] Sheeet, Detroit is the minor leagues for Mobtown. Come to Baltimore for REAL mayhem. Buffalo? That’s single A ball. ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453/11 "2008-01-14T17:51:30Z")
Nobody wears a shirt to the convenience store. Or shoes. Just shorts and a gun. ---
**Author:** ![Wee\_Bairn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/90db22/32.png) [@Wee\_Bairn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wee_Bairn)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453/12 "2008-01-14T17:51:53Z")
All cops are very sensitive souls, and it really, really hurts their feelings when they find out you have lied to them about something. If you have heroin on you and had admitted it when the cop asked you, chances are he would have let you go for being honest, but when you lie you hurt his feelings and he has no choice but to arrest you. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453/13 "2008-01-14T18:05:24Z")
[QUOTE=Shirley Ujest] Come to Detroit and we’ll show what a violent hole really is! [/QUOTE] The captain of the freighter upon which I was working would not let us off when we tied up in Detroit. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453/14 "2008-01-14T18:05:59Z")
The U.S. is an incredibly friendly place. People frequently borrow cars from good friends they’ve just met, whose names they don’t know, but whom they know ‘from around’. American men have notoriously bad eyesight, and often fail to notice that the 6-foot brunette-wigged hitchhiker with the Adam’s apple and the five 'o clock shadow, to whom they’ve generously offered to give a ride, is not quite female. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453/15 "2008-01-14T18:07:12Z")
What they never seem to show on Cops is the county cop in Wisconsin who tossed me in the can for a day for being a passenger in a truck that was not speeding. Canadian plates equals a free lunch. ---
**Author:** ![Pushkin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ee59a6/32.png) [@Pushkin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pushkin)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453/16 "2008-01-14T18:30:06Z")
US Culture? You can learn about the how darned world from that show. Nice to know that no matter how undemocratic and oppressive the regime, any time the cops are on the streets its to protect and serve, protect and serve 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453/17 "2008-01-14T18:32:27Z")
[QUOTE=GaryM] Folks with contraband in their cars regularly allow the police to search said car. [/QUOTE] But they turn hostile the moment the officer finds said contraband, and start fighting despite having the victory odds of an earthworm attacking a tank. ---
**Author:** ![Sprockets](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/35a633/32.png) [@Sprockets](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sprockets)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453/18 "2008-01-14T20:21:43Z")
Five cops will pile onto one drunken redneck, throw him face down into the gravel, kneel on his back, stand on his throat, and taunt him while the dog lunges on the leash. . . . . **before the man is charged and while cameras are known to be rolling.** ---
**Author:** ![Tristan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tristan/32/18058_2.png) [@Tristan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tristan)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453/19 "2008-01-14T20:54:38Z")
[QUOTE=Sprockets] Five cops will pile onto one drunken redneck, throw him face down into the gravel, kneel on his back, stand on his throat, and taunt him while the dog lunges on the leash. . . . . **before the man is charged and while cameras are known to be rolling.** [/QUOTE] Subduing a violent suspect rarely uses featherdusters. Criminals rarely respond to niceness with “I’m sorry officer. It’s true, I have crack cocaine. Here’s my pistol. I’ll just go sit in your car and think about what I’ve done.” ---
**Author:** ![BMax](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bmax/32/4267_2.png) [@BMax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMax)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453/20 "2008-01-14T21:08:35Z")
Cops know the prostitutes who work their area and are on a first-name basis with them. Cops are good friends to the hookers. **EVERYONE** runs from the cops. Nobody gets away from them either. **EVERYONE** that the cops pull over has drugs in their car. They often have guns and/or stolen property in their cars too. Many have warrants as well. **NOBODY** knows who the drugs belong to, or that they have an active warrant. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/everything-i-know-about-u-s-culture-i-learned-from-cops/433453.md?page=2)