# Evil Captor's suspension **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 13, 2006, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172 "2006-03-13T15:49:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 14
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172/261 "2006-03-14T19:39:57Z")
So, **Excalibre** , you bitch about not getting any apologies: > [@Excalibre](#): > > None of the people who said nasty things about me in that thread have apologized so far. I see it, and acknowledge and apologize: > [@Anaamika](#): > > Sigh. I was one of the ones who insulted you. Can’t remember if it was in that thread or another, but it unnecessary and unlike me. In my meager defense, I was still seething from some comments you made to a completely different poster in a different thread/topic, which I thought were completely unjustified. Still, I shouldn’t have let my feelings about that carry over. > > I’m sorry, Excalibre. And yet I still get sniped at, for no reason that I can see. > [@Excalibre](#): > > Stop being such a prude, **kimera**. **Anaamika** will be in shortly to give you a lecture on how you need to start tying up your sexual partners. Well, OK. I get it. You just want to whine about not getting apologies, but when you actually get one, you choose to ignore it. ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172/262 "2006-03-14T19:40:31Z")
> [@Excalibre](#): > > She’s certainly right that the content of his fantasies is upsetting to _you_, as is pretty clear in reading **Ensign Edison** ’s six-page pit thread a couple weeks back. I don’t share your views on consensual bondage, but I can respect that you’ve come to them through thought and knowledge. But since you are specifically bothered by that sort of thing, it seems obvious that your own views of it are playing a role in the discussion. Actually, you’d be wrong here. There are many people here whose worldviews I disagree with. THere is only one whose behavior I believe to be worth Mod-eration. My posts in that thread were an attempt to show, not why EC should be Mod-erated, but specifically in response to his contention that the ONLY reason someone might have to objecting to BDSM was prudery; that there was no other possible explanation. See the two different subjects that you seem to be conflating? EC’s behavior, and reasons for not being a BDSM enthusiast. THe first, concrete and germaine to the thread; the second, an abstract tangent, meant only to rebut EC’s simplistic view of martyrdom at the hands of the ignorant. I hope I’ve made myself a little clearer here. I should have opened a different thread, in that older thread, rather than chance the conflation of the two discussions. But again, if you can find me one other example of where my disagreement with a Doper’s \*worldview \*has led me to suggest Mod-eration of their _behavior_, I’ll address it. Absent that, perhaps you can see the distinction, still, between EC’s worldview, which I don’t share but would never censor, and his behavior, which is the only thing I’ve addressed in this context. See how easy it is to conflate the two? ---
**Author:** ![Greathouse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/greathouse/32/2992_2.png) [@Greathouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greathouse)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172/263 "2006-03-14T19:43:37Z")
> [@Excalibre](#): > > \…shall I dig up that pit thread where I (among others) tried hard to persuade him not to melt down into a ball of furious stupidity? Yes! Please & Thank you. ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172/264 "2006-03-14T19:44:23Z")
> [@Ensign Edison](#): > > Ye-eah, I think you’ve called lissener a “shrill drama queen” more than once now. Why do you keep doing that? I mean, here you are, in the drama with him. This is the Pit. We’re all drama queens here. Except Jersey Jim. …snip… Don’t worry about me; I am barely in this thread. I said my point of view and Lissener arguing over what Maureen really meant is somewhat boring. If by any weird chance something new comes up I will post again but even Kimera’s post did not refocus the thread. \*\*For the Record: \*\* Who Posted? Total Posts: 257 User Name Posts Excalibre 37 lissener 31 Lute Skywatcher 15 Maureen 13 Ensign Edison 12 duffer 9 Q.E.D. 8 Binarydrone 7 Operation Ripper 6 Guinastasia 6 Larry Borgia 6 What Exit? 6 {now 7} By the way, Lissener does come off Shrill. My usage might not be the correct one or the same as Maureen’s. I mean when he is caught up on a single point and continues to go on about it, instead of sounding like the intelligent poster he is most of the time, he sounds Shrill to my ears. {If you will pardon the use of Ears for a message Board} Jersey Jim ---
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172/265 "2006-03-14T19:47:53Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > So, **Excalibre** , you bitch about not getting any apologies: > > I see it, and acknowledge and apologize: > > And yet I still get sniped at, for no reason that I can see. > > Well, OK. I get it. You just want to whine about not getting apologies, but when you actually get one, you choose to ignore it. {{{{{{ **Anaamika** }}}}}} I don’t see where I promised to accept your apology. It was awfully half-hearted (it went something like this: I shouldn’t have said that - it’s just that you were _such_ a jerk in another thread that I felt compelled!) Besides, while I’m not even sure whether you insulted me _personally_, you made a _lot_ of posts with the ridiculous assertion that people who didn’t like **Evil Captor** ’s behavior were prudes - which means you indirectly insulted me quite a number of times - not to mention stubbornly clinging to an idiotic belief in spite of plenty of evidence to the contrary. I guess in your mind, one half-hearted apology, and that’s all gone, and I’m obliged to make nice with you now? Besides, at this point I frankly just don’t like you. You were quite the bitch during that whole pitting and afterwards. In such a consistent manner that it’s tainted the thought of you. I don’t see why I should have to pretend to like you just because you made one half-hearted apology. Do you want more hugs? ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172/266 "2006-03-14T19:52:33Z")
> [@What Exit?](#): > > Don’t worry about me; I am barely in this thread. I said my point of view and Lissener arguing over what Maureen really meant is somewhat boring. > If by any weird chance something new comes up I will post again but even Kimera’s post did not refocus the thread. > > \*\*For the Record: \*\* > Who Posted? > Total Posts: 257 > User Name Posts > Excalibre 37 > lissener 31 > Lute Skywatcher 15 > Maureen 13 > Ensign Edison 12 > duffer 9 > Q.E.D. 8 > Binarydrone 7 > Operation Ripper 6 > Guinastasia 6 > Larry Borgia 6 > What Exit? 6 {now 7} Heh. Interesting, but from my vantage point, it would appear that where lissener posts once, he’s just as likely to post 20 or 30 times. Guin posts a minimum of 6 times in _every_ thread in every forum. Between the two, they can suffocate rational discussion like a hail of damp cotton. ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172/267 "2006-03-14T19:52:47Z")
> [@lissener](#): > > Actually, you’d be wrong here. There are many people here whose worldviews I disagree with. THere is only one whose behavior I believe to be worth Mod-eration. > > My posts in that thread were an attempt to show, not why EC should be Mod-erated, but specifically in response to his contention that the ONLY reason someone might have to objecting to BDSM was prudery; that there was no other possible explanation. > > See the two different subjects that you seem to be conflating? EC’s behavior, and reasons for not being a BDSM enthusiast. THe first, concrete and germaine to the thread; the second, an abstract tangent, meant only to rebut EC’s simplistic view of martyrdom at the hands of the ignorant. > > I hope I’ve made myself a little clearer here. I should have opened a different thread, in that older thread, rather than chance the conflation of the two discussions. > > But again, if you can find me one other example of where my disagreement with a Doper’s \*worldview \*has led me to suggest Mod-eration of their _behavior_, I’ll address it. Absent that, perhaps you can see the distinction, still, between EC’s worldview, which I don’t share but would never censor, and his behavior, which is the only thing I’ve addressed in this context. > > See how easy it is to conflate the two? And in any case, I’m NOT suggesting that the responses to EC aren’t complex and non-monolothic: my argument in this LUDICROUS tangent has simply been that THAT’S NOT WHAT MAUREEN MEANT with her sarcastic hyperbole. \*\*Y. M. M. V.\*\* ---
**Author:** ![Ensign\_Edison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ab992/32.png) [@Ensign\_Edison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ensign_Edison)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172/268 "2006-03-14T19:54:13Z")
> [@Maureen](#): > > As have we all from time to time. The nature of the Pit, and so on. Okay, thanks for explaining. It’s less weird now, though I don’t think of him as shrill or even a drama queen, though that may be, as they say, because it takes one to never notice anyone else being one because it’s all about MEEEEE Er, sorry. As for the nature of the Pit thing, don’t get me wrong. I wasn’t pitying him. I just like to jump in on the losing side. Maybe I’m a masochist. ;j ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172/269 "2006-03-14T19:54:52Z")
Sigh. No, I don’t really care if you accept it or not, but you could have at least asked me what I really meant. I wasn’t giving you a half-hearted apology. Let me repeat it. - In my meager defense, I was still seething from some comments you made to a completely different poster in a different thread/topic, which I thought were completely unjustified. Still, I \*_shouldn’t have let my feelings \*\* about that carry over._ In other words, whether you were unjustified in that other thread or not, it was only my opinion. And I still should not have let my feelings carry over to the \*\*EC \*\* thread. And to be honest, when I was making my comments about prudes, I wasn’t even thinking about you but the person who made the \*first \* thread. It seems you have stipulations on your apologies. That they must fit your requirements. I even said it was a meager defense; I never claimed I was justified in making it! Still, I kind of already got the feeling that you were not inclined to get over it. I don’t think you’re “obliged to get over it”. All I’m asking is to not be dragged into yet another thread which I haven’t participated in one way or the other - except to apologize to you. I’ve kept my mouth shut, so please leave me out of it. ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172/270 "2006-03-14T19:55:10Z")
This thread is moving too fast for me. Apparently I completely agree with Maureen though. Jim ---
**Author:** ![Binarydrone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3da27b/32.png) [@Binarydrone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Binarydrone)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172/271 "2006-03-14T19:56:16Z")
**Excalibre** , So, are you saying that you have an irrational hatred for people that are into bondage? Can you clarify? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172/272 "2006-03-14T19:57:07Z")
> [@What Exit?](#): > > \*\*For the Record: \*\* > Who Posted? > Total Posts: 257 > User Name Posts > Excalibre 37 > lissener 31 > Lute Skywatcher 15 > Maureen 13 > Ensign Edison 12 > duffer 9 > Q.E.D. 8 > Binarydrone 7 > Operation Ripper 6 > Guinastasia 6 > Larry Borgia 6 > What Exit? 6 {now 7} I tend to get tenacious when trying to get somemone to consider the possibility that they’re not as right as they think they are. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172/273 "2006-03-14T20:03:08Z")
> [@Lute Skywatcher](#): > > I tend to get tenacious when trying to get somemone to consider the possibility that they’re not as right as they think they are. 🙂 Lissener is in one of his pit moods where he has decided he is right and he won’t accept that anyone else’s view is a viable option unless they agree with him. This thread will eventually die out and he will recover and go back to his very thoughtful and insightful posts in the Cafe. In the meantime, arguing with him won’t end up making a difference to him. Jim ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172/274 "2006-03-14T20:07:04Z")
> [@What Exit?](#): > > In the meantime, arguing with him won’t end up making a difference to him. Which is what usually happens whenever I try get someone to consider that they might not be as right as they think they are. I still engage the practice, though, if only to have it serve as an example to those who come later. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172/275 "2006-03-14T20:07:55Z")
Ok, I’m going to end my hijack. One last thing, which I don’t think came clear: **Ex** , I am not sorry for what I said, but I am most definitely sorry for the way I said it. You’re right that it was nasty and bitchy and I’m really contrite about that. I should have said it calmer and listened to what you guys had to say, too. Whether you care or not, that’s your lookout, though. I won’t be checking this thread anymore. Bye. ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172/276 "2006-03-14T20:14:39Z")
> [@What Exit?](#): > > Lissener is in one of his pit moods where he has decided he is right and he won’t accept that anyone else’s view is a viable option unless they agree with him. Sigh. I have acknowledged the other views. I have only said that I don’t agree with them. I’m not trying to convince anyone, I’m just saying they haven’t convinced me. End of story. ---
**Author:** ![kimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f0a364/32.png) [@kimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kimera)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172/277 "2006-03-14T20:17:21Z")
> [@Dubious Weasle](#): > > a] But somehow we need insight into your sick fantasy life? :dubious: I prefer keeping my fantasy life off of the board. I only mentioned it because, once again, I am being called a prude who just needs to get into BDSM. If you had read the threads then you would have understood that. > [@](#): > > b] By “EC’s Cafe Society thread” did you mean the _“best” movies that need explaining_ thread aka _the Deathstalker thread_? If so, what the hell? The thread title could have used a little more explanation I suppose. Of course, on the other hand it was a thread about things which “need explanation” so maybe that was appropriate. Yep, it was the Deathstalker thread and it was his graphic discription of a woman being sexually assulted that I found reportable. If he had a put a little warning before it then I would have had no problem with it. I liked the rest of the thread a lot and only reported one post that I thought went over the line. I don’t come to this message board for my sexual kicks. There’s thousands of other, better places I can go to for that and I don’t think that it is appropriate on this message board. ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172/278 "2006-03-14T20:19:30Z")
> [@Lute Skywatcher](#): > > Which is what usually happens whenever I try get someone to consider that they might not be as right as they think they are. I still engage the practice, though, if only to have it serve as an example to those who come later. It works sometimes. It really does. I just don’t have the time to include the cites. I know \*\*Campion \*\* got me to see reason in a early pit thread and I checked \*\*FinnAgain \*\* once when he overreacted to something in a pit thread and I have seen many others where people agree to disagree and wish each other luck. I think \*\*Lissener \*\* will even admit that he gets very single minded sometimes. When he knows he is right, he will not give an inch. (No matter how many people try to tell him he was wrong. 😉 ) Jim ---
**Author:** ![Syntropy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/65b543/32.png) [@Syntropy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Syntropy)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172/279 "2006-03-14T20:20:43Z")
> [@lissener](#): > > Sigh. I have acknowledged the other views. I have only said that I don’t agree with them. I’m not trying to convince anyone, I’m just saying they haven’t convinced me. End of story. No, you didn’t disagree with me. First you accused me of doing something I didn’t do, then you tried to insinuate your perception as my opinion, THEN, when I explained you were wrong, you called me a liar. That’s not disagreeing. ---
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172/280 "2006-03-14T20:20:51Z")
> [@Binarydrone](#): > > **Excalibre** , So, are you saying that you have an irrational hatred for people that are into bondage? Can you clarify? 😛 Well, my prudery started when when a grizzled old schoolmarm beat me with a ruler when she found me looking at an old Playboy I discovered on the playground. Also, my mother used to slap me if I spent too long in the bathroom - I learned to eat plenty of fiber, let me tell you! Plus there was the time when a group of nuns tied me up and whipped me for hours to chase the evil thoughts away. I’m grateful now, as they succeeded, and my mind is pure as the driven snow. And so I want to share my success at ridding my mind of the pure _eeeevil_ that is sex with the rest of you. And I want to do that by censoring **Evil Captor** and punishing him for acting as though sex is something for adults to enjoy, rather than a duty to be discharged with tightly-shut eyes and clenched teeth in order to propogate the species. > [@Anaamika](#): > > And to be honest, when I was making my comments about prudes, I wasn’t even thinking about you but the person who made the \*first \* thread. Irrelevant. You tarred a whole lot of us with your broad brush. > [@](#): > > It seems you have stipulations on your apologies. That they must fit your requirements. I even said it was a meager defense; I never claimed I was justified in making it! It’s not that it has to “meet my requirements”. It’s that I don’t feel any inclination to forgive you. Rather than read the thread and evaluate people’s arguments, you decided to jump right in and “team up” with the sexual libertine - no doubt partially out of a desire to continue cultivating your image as the SDMB’s naughty little sex kitten. I don’t like that sort of teaming up at the best of times, but when you continued for quite some time making snide little comments about those who happened not to like **Evil Captor** ’s “contributions”, just because you decided you were on his “side”, it struck me how immature your approach to the whole thing was, and how unwilling you were to even listen to anyone who disagreed (as evidenced by the way you _continued_ to suggest that we were all poor, pitiable prudes _long_ after it should have been clear to you that those who didn’t like what **Evil Captor** was doing were not motivated by prudery. You joined up with one “side” and played a major role in turning that thread into some stupid little war between the prudes and the libertines rather than what was intended - a discussion of whether it’s okay for **Evil Captor** to continually hijack threads to talk about his own little sexual fantasies. You ignored all the times when it was made clear that the “prudes” were not motivated by prudery at all, and continued to suggest it afterwards. You were a complete asshole about the whole thing for quite some time. And that’s why one meaningless little “I’m sorta sorry” that appears just to be motivated by the fact that your “side” isn’t winning this “battle” doesn’t mean much to me. > [@](#): > > Still, I kind of already got the feeling that you were not inclined to get over it. I don’t think you’re “obliged to get over it”. All I’m asking is to not be dragged into yet another thread which I haven’t participated in one way or the other - except to apologize to you. I’ve kept my mouth shut, so please leave me out of it. Why shouldn’t you get dragged into it? You were no stranger to the other threads on the subject - you got your share of digs in at me and those who agreed with me, at any rate - so even if you’re not bothering _this_ time around, I don’t see why you feel you have some special right for your name not to be mentioned. It’s not like I’m bringing you up in a totally irrelevant thread - you _did_ offer a condescending post suggesting the rest of us get over it and try out bondage for ourselves. Different thread, but same subject matter, and your shitty behavior in the other ones is of the same (limited) relevance here. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172.md?page=13) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/evil-captors-suspension/348172.md?page=15)