# Excuse me, Madam.. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 9, 2003, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299 "2003-11-09T22:51:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Ilsa\_Lund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a6a055/32.png) [@Ilsa\_Lund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ilsa_Lund)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299/1 "2003-11-09T22:51:19Z")
_ **DO NOT TALK ON YOUR FUCKING CELL PHONE AT THE TOP OF YOUR LUNGS IN THE GODDAMN LIBRARY!!** _ ME::eek: 😕 :smack: :wally :dubious: :rolleyes: ☹ _Edited to remove the fucking 25 continuous exclamation-fucking-marks that were fucking up the bloody horizontal scroll bar. Dammit._ ---
**Author:** ![fortytwo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f9ae1b/32.png) [@fortytwo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fortytwo)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299/2 "2003-11-09T22:59:04Z")
Shush V ---
**Author:** ![Flutterby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Flutterby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flutterby)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299/3 "2003-11-09T23:27:08Z")
We don’t have a problem with cell’s at this library. It’s the kids. This is a small library and we get kids in most age ranges running around, fiddling with the computers (I go online here a lot and I get to watch a lot of kids ‘play’ with the computer messing it up. I usually say something to them but I can’t enforce it. I don’t work here nor am I their parent. I do mention it to the librarians on duty though.) A lot of the time we have kids using this as their personal playground. When one is just outside. A _nice_ playground too. This is a library!! Not your place to play tag and run around yelling! You’ve been told plenty of times by the librarians to be quiet and have been kicked out enough for your problem behavior that you should know not to do that anymore! Your 10!! Not 3 years old!! Sheesh even I knew at 5 that the library was a quiet place, you don’t run around screaming there. ---
**Author:** ![Lsura](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7993a0/32.png) [@Lsura](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lsura)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299/4 "2003-11-09T23:28:16Z")
But I was just so excited, see. It was all cool and stuff, and there was this guy, but not my boyfriend, but I think I’d like him to be. That means I have to break up with Bubba, but if I do that, then he won’t give me presents anymore, so do you think I can keep seeing Bubba and go out with this other guy too? I mean, it’s not Bubba will find out, right? Oh, and then last night a bunch of us went to the bar, and there were these other guys here, and then they were all dancing and stuff, but they weren’t any good at it. If they had been, of course me and Bitsy and Muffy and Buffy would have been out there dancing with them, but instead we had to laugh at them. They were dancing like it was three years ago. How lame. Ok, I overhear too many cell phone conversations in the library. This is just a compilation of many of them that may or may not have happened yesterday. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![BubbaDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bubbadog/32/333_2.png) [@BubbaDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BubbaDog)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299/5 "2003-11-09T23:32:24Z")
It’s OK **Lsura** , I’m on to her. I dumped her and beat up her new boy friend too. Bubba ---
**Author:** ![Ilsa\_Lund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a6a055/32.png) [@Ilsa\_Lund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ilsa_Lund)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2003, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299/6 "2003-11-10T00:48:01Z")
No problem with kids here, just cell phones. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2003, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299/7 "2003-11-10T00:55:50Z")
I ghoddam near fell outta my chair when I saw that super-sized post! Even I don’t do that anymore. Switch to decaf. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2003, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299/8 "2003-11-10T02:31:58Z")
Take it easy with the size tag, will you?! ---
**Author:** ![SanguineSpider](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@SanguineSpider](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SanguineSpider)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2003, 5:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299/9 "2003-11-10T05:46:59Z")
Not just the library, hun… it’s friggin’ everywhere! “Can you hear me now?”… “No, you gotta scream into your cell, I can’t hear you.” Like I want to hear your cell phone chat about the nasty itch between your… or how Tracy is tryin’ to steal Jeff away, OMG! What a b… or the ingredients you need hubby to get at the store. Shut the puck up, fools! Puckin’ be aware that the whole world can hear you and we don’t really need to! ---
**Author:** ![Doomtrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Doomtrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doomtrain)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2003, 6:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299/10 "2003-11-10T06:17:51Z")
I had no idea **Sanguine** was so passionate about talking hockey equipment. ---
**Author:** ![Ilsa\_Lund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a6a055/32.png) [@Ilsa\_Lund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ilsa_Lund)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2003, 1:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299/11 "2003-11-10T13:14:18Z")
I apologize, Lynn. I just wanted to get a point across. In a hysterical, haven’t taken thorazine sort of way. ---
**Author:** ![Sassafras](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a87d85/32.png) [@Sassafras](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sassafras)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2003, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299/12 "2003-11-10T13:30:53Z")
At my library it’s the freaking LIBRARIANS who talk at the top of their lungs. Well, okay, maybe not at the top of their lungs, but maybe a wee bit louder than a normal conversational tone, which ECHOES across the silence of the library. And the conversations aren’t even work related , it’s personal chit chat between them. Drives me crazy. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2003, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299/13 "2003-11-10T13:36:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Kristi \* > \*\*At my library it’s the freaking LIBRARIANS who talk at the top of their lungs. Well, okay, maybe not at the top of their lungs, but maybe a wee bit louder than a normal conversational tone, which ECHOES across the silence of the library. And the conversations aren’t even work related , it’s personal chit chat between them. > Drives me crazy. \*\* A small bet that these noisy people are library aides/techs, not librarians, who usually know better. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2003, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299/14 "2003-11-10T14:44:39Z")
What was a Madam doing in the library? ---
**Author:** ![Briny\_Deep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/briny_deep/32/17188_2.png) [@Briny\_Deep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Briny_Deep)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2003, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299/15 "2003-11-10T14:59:06Z")
You can lead a whore to culture, but you can’t make her think. ---
**Author:** ![7\_up\_yours](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/7/919ad9/32.png) [@7\_up\_yours](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/7_up_yours)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2003, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299/16 "2003-11-10T18:36:03Z")
Oh boy. I hate to follow a cliche, but I know EXACTLY what you’re talking about. This semester, I have a three hour period between my calculus class and my English class, so those three hours are usually spent in the library either studying or playing around in my laptop (just like right now). And there’s always some bitch who yaks on her cell phone. Most of the time, it’s quiet and discreet, and something along the lines of “I can’t talk right now, I’ll try to call you later”. But last week, this bitch yaked on for about ten minutes before some guy said loudly “I thought I was in the library, not a god damn hot gossip center” Wanted to give him a pat on the back. **SanguineSpider** , I agree that it’s annoying wherever it is, but I have to say, when it happens in the library, it’s more than annoying because a library is supposed to be QUIET! ---
**Author:** ![Yumanite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/b487fb/32.png) [@Yumanite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yumanite)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2003, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299/17 "2003-11-10T19:43:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by masonite \* > \*\*You can lead a whore to culture, but you can’t make her think. \*\* Not according to the American Whore-to-Cultural Society. ---
**Author:** ![fushj00mang](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/d26b3c/32.png) [@fushj00mang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fushj00mang)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2003, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299/18 "2003-11-11T04:57:27Z")
> [@](#): > > American Whore-to-Cultural Society But I thought you could look up plants and stuff at the library! (sorry, bad pun) ---
**Author:** ![Tortuga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c4cdca/32.png) [@Tortuga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tortuga)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2003, 6:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299/19 "2003-11-11T06:19:05Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by 7 up yours \ ***SanguineSpider** , I agree that it’s annoying wherever it is, but I have to say, when it happens in the library, it’s more than annoying because a library is supposed to be QUIET! Not to hijack, but what’s going on? I don’t see the post by **Sanguine Spider** which is being referenced…and this has happened a few times lately, where someone has responded to another poster within a thread, although the post which triggered said response appears to be AWOL. Are the hamsters that sadistically selective, eating posts retro-actively? OT: to the OP, amen and lordy hallelujah, turn the phucking phone off when you’re in the library! I hat these ridiculous ringtones set to “drown out the sound of any possible nearby jet engine” decibel levels. And re: the kids gone wild issue, another amen, glory hallelujah, fer shizzle…since when did public libraries become day care centers or supervisory after-school programs. Makes me want to get a van, some duct tape, and start absconding with the noisiest ones. I would just take them into the wilderness, leave them, and the ones who made it back could sell their stories to 20/20, Oprah, Dateline, and maybe even partner with Dr. Phil to create a new fad diet based on soft, warm, squishy, lint-covered gummy bears. ---
**Author:** ![Nvme77](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c89c15/32.png) [@Nvme77](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nvme77)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2003, 6:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299/20 "2003-11-11T06:26:34Z")
My pulse has now returned to normal. I keep my kids latched to my thighs in the library and any other time we go out in public because I would hate to be “that” mom. Therefore I cannot talk on my cell and take care of the kids. How do these ladies and (sometimes) gentlemen do it? Actually, I am still breathing kind of hard still from the font size of the OP. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-madam/212299.md?page=2)