# "Excuse me miss, but my baby is NOT a 'half'."
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675
**Category:** The BBQ Pit
**Created:** [May 12, 2002, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675 "2002-05-12T20:24:55Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@Redboss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Redboss)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2002, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675/21 "2002-05-13T06:32:17Z")
Can I just alert everybody on the Boards to the fact that nobody has yet jumped on **JohnT** for his [ul][li]grammar[/li][li]spelling[/li][li]attitude to women[/li][li]poor fathering skills[/li][li]inability to communicate or[/li][li]bad posture[/li][/ul]
Come on gang - don’t let this man get away with voicing an opinion without the usual pile-on.
Remember our motto “only the people we already know with the issues we already know” Make sure he regrets ever having raised his voice, the nasty intruder! Who does he think he is?
Dear **JohnT** - aren’t these boards great? If your post rate is up in the high teens every day, you’ll get well known and you can say anything you like on these Boards. One beloved regular poster started **three** threads on the illness of her kitten a while ago .
She got criticised too, but the troops soon tore those foolish insensitive dolts to shreds. Just don’t sweat it mate. I think your point is a good one, but even if I disagreed, I’m still convinvced you have very right to post it here.
And people who think you’re wrong could always just turn to the next thread - It’s not as if there’s any shortage, let’s face it.
Hows your wife, by the way? Or as we often say here, the other half? [exits hastily]
Redboss
---
### Author:  [@Tsubaki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tsubaki)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2002, 9:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675/22 "2002-05-13T09:53:35Z")
_throws bouquets of roses at **Redboss** _
Bravo!
---
### Author:  [@Phlip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlip)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2002, 10:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675/23 "2002-05-13T10:02:48Z")
This is the gayest fucking rant I have ever read in my life.
If this is the best thing you can have to rant about you are living a charmed life. I wish I could bitch about gay shit like this.
---
### Author:  [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2002, 10:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675/24 "2002-05-13T10:12:55Z")
Sorry Redboss, but the freedom to post his opinion affords other people the freedom to criticize it.
It didnt appear to be a pile on from where I’m sitting. Or is suddenly a group of people making valid arguments against a point suddenly a pile on?
It was a stupid thing to rant about. The OP took the Waitress’ comments up the completely wrong way.
This has been anything but a pile on.
And yes, regular posters do get torn down as well.
Different strokes for different folks I guess…
---
### Author:  [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2002, 10:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675/25 "2002-05-13T10:23:28Z")
Actually, I thought it was only a _HALF-WAY_ decent toasting me’self. 😃
---
### Author:  [@Steve\_Wright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_Wright)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2002, 11:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675/26 "2002-05-13T11:27:09Z")
I’m inclined to agree with **Redboss**. Something (admittedly trivial) pushes **JohnT** ’s buttons, so he posts a rant about it here. Well, that’s one of the things the Pit is here for, isn’t it?
And posting a message on a board (that the hostess in question has probably never heard of) hardly constitutes an overreaction. Now, if **JohnT** had pulled out an industrial nail gun and tacked the hostess to the ceiling while screaming “_My daughter is a whole person you @_%^_!!!_”, then his behaviour might be deserving of criticism. But he didn’t. (I hope.)
---
### Author:  [@kabbes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kabbes)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2002, 11:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675/27 "2002-05-13T11:31:17Z")
**Steve** , you’ve thought about that punishment in a little too much detail.
Tell me there isn’t a bicycling launderette owner who made too much noise regretting his actions right now.
pan
---
### Author:  [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2002, 12:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675/28 "2002-05-13T12:12:49Z")
The thing is, anybody with kids knows that they are only half-human anyway!
{d & r’s}
---
### Author:  [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2002, 12:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675/29 "2002-05-13T12:28:48Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Redboss \*
> \*\*
> Dear **JohnT** - aren’t these boards great? If your post rate is up in the high teens every day, you’ll get well known and you can say anything you like on these Boards. One beloved regular poster started **three** threads on the illness of her kitten a while ago .
>
> She got criticised too, but the troops soon tore those foolish insensitive dolts to shreds.
> \*\*
Um…to set the record straight…(if we’re talking about the same incident), the “foolish, insensitive dolt” was _gloating_ that her kitten was going to die, and wished for it to do so. Repeatedly. In a grieving-type thread.
Behaviour that obscene deserves tearing to shreds.
And I see only minor disagreement with the OP as a whole. No anger, no “tearing to shreds”, just mild disagreement.
Please, **Redboss** : tell me you haven’t joined the dark-side: the “It’s only a rant, it doesn’t need to be accurate.” crowd! :eek:
Fenris
---
### Author:  [@sidle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sidle)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2002, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675/30 "2002-05-13T14:02:06Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Hamlet \*
> \*\*Here’s a coupon for a free Grand Slam at Denny’s. Maybe you could save up some money and buy a sense of humor too, because I seriously doubt she meant to impune wonderful Sophie. So get some rest, and we’ll see you later. Hope your trip was otherwise fun. \*\*
Just thought this deserved repeating.
Right on, Hamlet…
---
### Author:  [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2002, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675/31 "2002-05-13T15:04:03Z")
Dammit, he has a right to post his rant! You people don’t have a right to criticize him for it!
Ummm . . . or something.
---
### Author:  [@Buck\_The\_Diver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Buck_The_Diver)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2002, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675/32 "2002-05-13T16:05:16Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Redboss \*
> \*\*
>
> Remember our motto “only the people we already know with the issues we already know” \*\*
**Redboss** , that is one of the funniest lines I have read on the boards! I tip my hat to you, sir.
Turning my attention to the OP…I just wish my life was so near a point of perfection that all I could find to rant about was how a waitress verbally acknowledged my child’s seating arrangements.
---
### Author:  [@stofsky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stofsky)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2002, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675/33 "2002-05-13T16:17:36Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Phlip \*
> \*\*This is the gayest fucking rant I have ever read in my life.
>
> If this is the best thing you can have to rant about you are living a charmed life. I wish I could bitch about gay shit like this. \*\*
I figure if I put **Esprix** ’s name here, he’ll find this thread (and post) in a vanity search and rip this “gay” jerk the new asshole he needs.
After all, since the OP has a kid and a wife, therefore this is a “gay” rant, right? And “gay” is an insult, right? Tell ya what, why don’t you go back in the high-school locker room and flip towels at the latest faggot-of-the-month and let the grownups talk.
Speaking of half-a-human…:rolleyes:
---
### Author:  [@auntie\_em](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/auntie_em)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2002, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675/34 "2002-05-13T16:30:38Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Sparkleegirl \*
> \*\*College student who waitresses on the side speaking here…
> Like everyone else has said, half is a term for either highchair or booster. I too would never say it in front of a customer, but you would be shocked at the high percentage of people who come up and ask for seating for 2 and half or just don’t mention their child at all. \*\*
Ditto that. And when I was a restaurant hostess, and someone walked in holding a baby and said, “Two and a Half,” I’d glance at the baby and say, “I dunno… looks like a whole person to ME…”
😉
---
### Author:  [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2002, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675/35 "2002-05-13T16:37:56Z")
> [@](#):
>
> Turning my attention to the OP…I just wish my life was so near a point of perfection that all I could find to rant about was how a waitress verbally acknowledged my child’s seating arrangements.
WTF? You agree with **Redboss** , then you bash on the OP anyway? You’re joking, yes?
---
### Author:  [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2002, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675/36 "2002-05-13T16:43:55Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Phlip \*
>
> This is the gayest fucking rant I have ever read in my life.
>
> If this is the best thing you can have to rant about you are living a charmed life. I wish I could bitch about gay shit like this.
😕
_{re-reads OP}_
I saw no reference to homosexuality in the OP. Could you clarify?
(Oh, and **John** , indeed, I don’t think the waitress meant offense. Travelling is exhausting - you’ll feel better after a few days at home. We’re pullin’ for ya. 😃 )
Esprix
---
### Author:  [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2002, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675/37 "2002-05-13T16:47:41Z")
**stofsky** - I found it all on my own. 😉
Esprix
---
### Author:  [@stofsky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stofsky)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2002, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675/38 "2002-05-13T16:51:00Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Esprix \*
> \*\*
>
> 😕
>
> _{re-reads OP}_
>
> I saw no reference to homosexuality in the OP. Could you clarify?
>
> (Oh, and **John** , indeed, I don’t think the waitress meant offense. Travelling is exhausting - you’ll feel better after a few days at home. We’re pullin’ for ya. 😃 )
>
> Esprix \*\*
26 minutes. Damn, **'sprix** , how often do you look for yourself anyhow? 😉
---
### Author:  [@Buck\_The\_Diver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Buck_The_Diver)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2002, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675/39 "2002-05-13T17:25:44Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by andros \*
> \*\*
>
> WTF? You agree with **Redboss** , then you bash on the OP anyway? You’re joking, yes? \*\*
**andros** , you misinterpret me, sir. I did not mean to imply that I agreed with **Redboss’** post. I merely stated that I found that particular line hilarious.
I apologize for any confusion.
---
### Author:  [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2002, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675/40 "2002-05-13T23:42:52Z")
Gotcha. My bad–I misread you (for apparantly no reason at all). Sorry 'bout that, carry on.
[Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675.md?page=1)
[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/excuse-me-miss-but-my-baby-is-not-a-half/108675.md?page=3)