# Exit Polls: Color Me Confoosed **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 4, 2004, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/exit-polls-color-me-confoosed/272890 "2004-11-04T01:42:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![celestina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/258eb7/32.png) [@celestina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/celestina)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2004, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/exit-polls-color-me-confoosed/272890/1 "2004-11-04T01:42:51Z")
Well, I’ve come to the conclusion that Americans are morons, and I don’t give a damn if folks want to flame me for making such a claim. I’m an American, and by definition that makes me a moron too. I declare I just don’t understand what on earth folks was thinking when they said that a significant percentage of what swayed their votes was “moral values.” For them folks what voted for Dubya because he strikes them as a moral person, I want you to repeat after me, and then write down 1000 times and turn it in tomorrow: ``` *Politics have absolutely nothing to do with morality or values, no matter what the candidates' sound bites say.* ``` To succeed in politics you have to play as dirty as you dare while simultaneously hoodwinking your audience into thinking you’re the best thing since sliced bread. Likewise, for those who voted for Kerry, who had the audacity to say that he wanted to “put common sense back into government”, repeat after me and then write it down 1000 times and turn in tomorrow: ``` *Politics have absolutely nothing to do with common sense, reason, rationality, or whatever you want to call it.* ``` Politics is about making bone-headed decisions because someone’s blackmailing you about one of the huge skeletons you’ve got stashed away in your closet. It’s time to wake up folks. Get a clue. [This is a public service announcement brought to you courtesy of celestina, who wonders if she should save up her money to get her tubes tied so she doesn’t contribute to the growing population of morons, or if she should save up her money for a one-way ticket on the next spaceship out of this universe.] ---
**Author:** ![Keapon\_Laffin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e274bd/32.png) [@Keapon\_Laffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Keapon_Laffin)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2004, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/exit-polls-color-me-confoosed/272890/2 "2004-11-04T02:49:57Z")
> [@celestina](#): > > To succeed in politics you have to play as dirty as you dare while simultaneously hoodwinking your audience into thinking you’re the best thing since sliced bread. > > Politics is about making bone-headed decisions because someone’s blackmailing you about one of the huge skeletons you’ve got stashed away in your closet. I doubt that these would have made very good exit poll questions. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![rjung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/45deac/32.png) [@rjung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjung)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2004, 7:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/exit-polls-color-me-confoosed/272890/3 "2004-11-04T07:18:31Z")
[On “values”:](http://www.boston.com/news/globe/editorial_opinion/oped/articles/2004/10/31/walking_the_walk_on_family_values/) > [@](#): > > The state with the lowest divorce rate in the nation is Massachusetts. At latest count it had a divorce rate of 2.4 per 1,000 population, while the rate for Texas was 4.1. > [@](#): > > Massachusetts has about the highest rate of education in the country, with 85 percent completing high school. For Texas the rate is 76 percent. One third of Massachusetts residents have completed college, compared with 23 percent of Texans, and the other Northeast states are right behind Massachusetts. > [@](#): > > The Northeast corridor, with Massachusetts as the hub, does have one of the highest levels of Catholics per state total. And it is also the case that these are among the states most strongly supportive of the Catholic Church’s teaching on social justice issues such as minimum and living wages and universal healthcare. ---
**Author:** ![celestina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/258eb7/32.png) [@celestina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/celestina)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2004, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/exit-polls-color-me-confoosed/272890/4 "2004-11-04T15:12:08Z")
**Keapon Laffin** , au contraire. I think they would have made excellent and very appropriate exit poll questions. 😃 By the way, I love your name. **rjung** , leave it to you to try to insert a _reasonable_ article into a perfectly good rant. 😛 Didn’t you read what I wrote? Politics have _absolutely nothing_ to do with reason, common sense, or moral values. You know, it’s a couple of days after, and I’m still just reeling over learning what folks was thinking when they voted. I just can’t wrap my mind around how folks could be so stupid. I just want to go out there and smack some common sense into folks, but they’re immune to it at this point. It’s difficult for me to abandon logic, but if that’s what it means to live in America, then I guess that’s what I’m going to have to do since I’m an American. I’m going to turn off my brain and leave things in the hands of the Lord. God help us all! ---
**Author:** ![BJMoose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@BJMoose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BJMoose)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2004, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/exit-polls-color-me-confoosed/272890/5 "2004-11-04T16:03:18Z")
I am now nearly convinced most folks have become so jaded by the political process that they deliberately vote for the worser of two weavils just to muck up things. Hell, I damn near didn’t vote (and, strictly speaking, it didn’t matter since, I think, I was on the losing side of every office/issue I bothered to vote on. Oy. Excuse me; I think I’ll go cry in some Moosehead Beer) ---
**Author:** ![misstee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/958977/32.png) [@misstee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/misstee)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2004, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/exit-polls-color-me-confoosed/272890/6 "2004-11-05T00:48:12Z")
> [@BJMoose](#): > > I I think, I was on the losing side of every office/issue I bothered to vote on. Oy. Excuse me; I think I’ll go cry in some Moosehead Beer) Got room for my tears in your Moosehead Beer? ---
**Author:** ![celestina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/258eb7/32.png) [@celestina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/celestina)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2004, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/exit-polls-color-me-confoosed/272890/7 "2004-11-06T19:14:35Z")
**BJMoose & misstee** , may I join you in a communal drowning of sorrows? ---
**Author:** ![pantom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/34f0e0/32.png) [@pantom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pantom)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2004, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/exit-polls-color-me-confoosed/272890/8 "2004-11-06T20:30:22Z")
The **rjung** cite just confirms what I’ve always thought all along: we shoulda burnt all them damn heretics back when we had the chance. Where’s the Spanish Inquisition when you need it? ---
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2004, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/exit-polls-color-me-confoosed/272890/9 "2004-11-06T21:20:26Z")
Those who vote decide nothing, those who COUNT the votes decide everything. - Stalin