# Explain to me about the red plastic testicles on the back of this truck **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 4, 2007, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760 "2007-04-04T20:15:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/50afbb/32.png) [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/1 "2007-04-04T20:15:44Z")
Seriously. I _want_ to understand this. I’m _straining_ to understand this. Yes, I know they’re called trucker balls or trucker nuts, and yes, I know some politico is trying to get them banned in Maryland, but what I want is, to _understand_ them. I happened to follow a pair of 'em out of the Wal-Mart parking lot and some considerable way down Water Street today, so I had ample time to study them (not to mention the spanking-new pickup, the double glass packs, the light bar, the rollbars, the huge tires, and the overweight fifty-something white guy behind the wheel with “weekend warrior” all over his jowly face), and now I’m sitting here with my pair of X chromosomes, wondering. Just wondering. I’m married to a Y chromosome who doesn’t seem to feel a need to swing a pair of red plastic testicles from his Ford Taurus. So, does my guy just lack the 'nads to go down to Auto Zone and let it all hang out and shock the old ladies at Wal-Mart? Is the Weekend Warrior the one I should have selected to father my children? Does the ability to drive around Decatur, Illinois with a pair of red plastic testicles decorating one’s car denote a high-status male, and all the guys driving around without 'em are pussies, and inferior breeding material? ---
**Author:** ![Duke\_of\_Rat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Duke\_of\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke_of_Rat)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/2 "2007-04-04T20:21:26Z")
You should have congratulated him for wresting them from his wife’s purse. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/3 "2007-04-04T20:22:26Z")
Any chance of getting a picture of these things? I feel so out of the loop. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21825_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/4 "2007-04-04T20:25:42Z")
I can only guess that some guys think they’re funny and/or shocking. I dunno. I think they’re kinda silly - especially the camoflage patterned models - but I’m not the target market. I also don’t get filling the back window of your sedan with stuffed animals or installing neon lights or wheel spinners or spoilers or chrome tailpipes. Each to his own, I guess. ---
**Author:** ![whole\_bean](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/96bed5/32.png) [@whole\_bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whole_bean)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/5 "2007-04-04T20:26:51Z")
[QUOTE=Kalhoun] Any chance of getting a picture of these things? I feel so out of the loop. [/QUOTE] [scroll down here](http://bullsballs.com/) ---
**Author:** ![pinkfreud](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pinkfreud/32/17603_2.png) [@pinkfreud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pinkfreud)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/6 "2007-04-04T20:28:11Z")
But what if my truck already has a truck bra up front? Will hanging balls on its rear cause gender confusion? ---
**Author:** ![nashiitashii](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7c8e57/32.png) [@nashiitashii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nashiitashii)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/7 "2007-04-04T20:28:43Z")
I was driving behind a pair of silver ones this morning that were attached to the back of a pickup truck. Honestly, I thought a little silver garbage bag had gotten stuck to the bottom of the truck until I got a closer look. How odd. ---
**Author:** ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/8 "2007-04-04T20:31:37Z")
Whenever I see them I consider them overcompensation for some, um, shortcoming. If you really got it, you don’t have to show it. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/9 "2007-04-04T20:31:50Z")
[QUOTE=whole bean] [scroll down here](http://bullsballs.com/) [/QUOTE] You misspelled scrote. I’d love to hear the conversation if and when he ever calls in to report them cut off or stolen. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/10 "2007-04-04T20:31:52Z")
We’ve had many threads on this already. You can get them in all colors 9including blue), and from a variety of sites. I figure it’s only a matter of time before somebody markets a bull schlong or a Prepuce Tassle\* to mount under the truck as well. - That’s the official name for the thing sticking out under the buffalo on various US state dollar coins and certain nickels. ---
**Author:** ![vibrotronica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a9a28c/32.png) [@vibrotronica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vibrotronica)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/11 "2007-04-04T20:37:11Z")
Short explaination: The owner of the truck is a jerk. ---
**Author:** ![Zakalwe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zakalwe/32/270_2.png) [@Zakalwe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zakalwe)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/12 "2007-04-04T20:55:21Z")
[QUOTE=vibrotronica] Short explaination: The owner of the truck is a jerk. [/QUOTE] Out of curiosity, is the long explanation any different? ---
**Author:** ![Sage\_Rat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sage_rat/32/399_2.png) [@Sage\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sage_Rat)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/13 "2007-04-04T21:01:30Z")
[QUOTE=pinkfreud] But what if my truck already has a truck bra up front? Will hanging balls on its rear cause gender confusion? [/QUOTE] Very tempting to offer to pay you to do this… ---
**Author:** ![Gukumatz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/74df32/32.png) [@Gukumatz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gukumatz)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/14 "2007-04-04T21:07:03Z")
[QUOTE=Zakalwe] Out of curiosity, is the long explanation any different? [/QUOTE] Well, my poke at the long answer is that the balls’ owner feels that the greatest pleasure known to driving humankind is in the indeterminable torture of the faint souls driving behind them. . . . Which wakes in me the strange desire to mount a giant scissor on the front of my car. _HAH! MY scissors beats your stones, asshat!_ ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/15 "2007-04-04T21:07:37Z")
[QUOTE=Zakalwe] Out of curiosity, is the long explanation any different? [/QUOTE] Yes. The owner of the truck is an asshole. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/16 "2007-04-04T21:08:24Z")
[QUOTE=whole bean] [scroll down here](http://bullsballs.com/) [/QUOTE] What. EVAH. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Lamar\_Mundane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/85f322/32.png) [@Lamar\_Mundane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamar_Mundane)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/17 "2007-04-04T21:11:46Z")
Do they sell Calvin dolls? I could see tying one on straddling the hitch. With a confederate flag in his hand. ---
**Author:** ![Hampshire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hampshire/32/4887_2.png) [@Hampshire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hampshire)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/18 "2007-04-04T21:17:37Z")
It’s a lame-o attempt to show how tough their truck is. As in “my truck has balls”. ---
**Author:** ![Queen\_Bruin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Queen\_Bruin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queen_Bruin)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/19 "2007-04-04T21:40:57Z")
Every time I see a pair I have an overwhelming urge to kick 'em. ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2007, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/20 "2007-04-04T21:53:01Z")
Wow. I’ve never seen this before. Is this another Southern thing? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760.md?page=2)