# Explain to me about the red plastic testicles on the back of this truck **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 4, 2007, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760 "2007-04-04T20:15:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![chaoticbear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@chaoticbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chaoticbear)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2008, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/81 "2008-01-16T04:03:13Z")
[QUOTE=whole bean] [scroll down here](http://bullsballs.com/) [/QUOTE] I like how they’re made from “Poly-pro-py-lene Co-poly-mer”. Hyphens must have gone down in price since I last checked. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2008, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/82 "2008-01-16T04:51:32Z")
Wow! Zombie balls! ---
**Author:** ![movingfinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@movingfinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/movingfinger)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2008, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/83 "2008-01-16T05:12:14Z")
“Honey? Um, I got these at the auto supply store. Aren’t they cool?” “Hmf. And just what do you plan on doing with them?” “Uh, I’d like to put them on the trailer hitch of my pickup. Is that OK with you?” “Why, of course it’s all right, dear. Just remember though, to put a Hillary Clinton bumper sticker on the bumper as close as possible.” “Aww, do I hafta?” “Yes, dear, you hafta. Now put on your apron; it’s your turn to do the dishes.” ---
**Author:** ![Shamozzle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shamozzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shamozzle)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2008, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/84 "2008-01-16T05:17:19Z")
It’s funny. I just took a new job with a company that does oil and gas well completions. The job requires a truck full of computers and other technical whiz-bangery. The truck is worth about $900,000. Hanging off the rear bumper: Trucker Balls. I can’t help but think that i work with retards. ---
**Author:** ![Ruby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/13edae/32.png) [@Ruby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruby)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2008, 6:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/85 "2008-01-16T06:19:33Z")
I was following a retarded TruckerBalls kind o’ guy just yesterday. He had the big, gas-guzzling 4-wheel-drive pickup with the red swinging \ boys. However, he chose to install the boys under the truck about 18" left of the center line instead of the hitch. The result was, um, lopsided. Retard-o-rama. ---
**Author:** ![Argent\_Towers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e8c25b/32.png) [@Argent\_Towers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Argent_Towers)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2008, 7:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/86 "2008-01-16T07:48:56Z")
Yeah I think all the judgment upon the owners of these things is kind of unwarranted. It’s called “a sense of humor.” Maybe a little crude, but hey, we live in a crude world. ---
**Author:** ![AmbushBug](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ambushbug/32/4600_2.png) [@AmbushBug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AmbushBug)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2008, 9:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/87 "2008-01-16T09:13:24Z")
Having seen these truck-nuts before, I must relate that the funniest car accessory I’d ever seen, on a truck which resembled this [1938 Ford pickup](http://www.ford-trucks.com/pictorial/big2/1938_ford_a1.html), had tied hanging under the rear bumper on a piece of twine, a pair of 1-inch ‘nuts’ (of the type one would screw bolts into). Old school! ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2008, 10:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/88 "2008-01-16T10:33:50Z")
But what if they’re gen-u-ine [support the troops desert camo?](http://www.yournutz.com/store/support-the-troops-desert-camo-campaign-p-156.html) Are those going to be illegal, too? Why does Virginia hate America? ---
**Author:** ![Argent\_Towers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e8c25b/32.png) [@Argent\_Towers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Argent_Towers)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2008, 10:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/89 "2008-01-16T10:40:29Z")
Not genuine. Our troops wear MARPAT. That thing looks like a camel’s nutsack. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2008, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/90 "2008-01-16T15:35:41Z")
I think that if they are going to use these things they should always be blue because, despite the name, I don’t think pick-ups trucks get that much action. ---
**Author:** ![Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/50afbb/32.png) [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2008, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/91 "2008-01-16T16:36:44Z")
[QUOTE=Shoshana] Wow! Zombie balls! [/QUOTE] Yeah, I know. 😃 But the ill-fated Maryland attempt to legislate a ban was mentioned on page 1, so I thought this merited an addendum. ---
**Author:** ![Spit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/76d3ee/32.png) [@Spit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spit)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2008, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/92 "2008-01-16T17:01:12Z")
My Lord, my God- What the idiots have done to the great Commonwealth of Virginia. I’m not sure whether it speaks to the citizenry, the politicians, or both. With that said, I am going to go buy a case of these retarded (oops- [can’t say that here either](http://hamptonroads.com/2008/01/delegates-vote-ban-usage-retardation)) things, plaster them all over my car, and drive around town. As I live within minutes of the capitol, I can only hope he sees me and is so distraught he must leave the Commonwealth. ---
**Author:** ![Sophistry\_and\_Illusion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@Sophistry\_and\_Illusion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sophistry_and_Illusion)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2008, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/93 "2008-01-16T17:12:47Z")
[QUOTE=Hampshire] It’s a lame-o attempt to show how tough their truck is. As in “my truck has balls”. [/QUOTE] If the balls are hanging from your rear end, you’re not necessarily the one with the balls, dear. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2008, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/94 "2008-01-16T17:22:25Z")
[QUOTE=Argent Towers] Our troops wear MARPAT. That thing looks like a camel’s nutsack. [/QUOTE] Err… would that make the hitch a camel tow? ---
**Author:** ![Ruby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/13edae/32.png) [@Ruby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruby)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2008, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/95 "2008-01-17T01:27:37Z")
[QUOTE=lieu] Err… would that make the hitch a camel tow? [/QUOTE] \ ---
**Author:** ![Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maggie_the_Ocelot)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2008, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/96 "2008-01-17T02:05:07Z")
I can’t believe that this link hasn’t come up yet; are the ranks of Achewood fans Doper-free? > **[Todd's Ana-Tomix](https://achewood.com/2006/01/11/title.html)** > > In the future, a Honda Pilot will mount your Honda Civic and you will honk to try to scare it off. (theme continues for 3 or 4 strips after this one) Behold, the next evolution of scrotal status symbology! ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2008, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/97 "2008-01-17T02:26:08Z")
[QUOTE=Tuckerfan] But what if they’re gen-u-ine [support the troops desert camo?](http://www.yournutz.com/store/support-the-troops-desert-camo-campaign-p-156.html) Are those going to be illegal, too? Why does Virginia hate America? [/QUOTE] The thought of _pinning a ribbon_ to anyone’s balls makes me wince. ---
**Author:** ![mangeorge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d78d45/32.png) [@mangeorge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mangeorge)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2008, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/98 "2008-01-17T02:51:16Z")
[QUOTE=Shamozzle] It’s funny. I just took a new job with a company that does oil and gas well completions. The job requires a truck full of computers and other technical whiz-bangery. The truck is worth about $900,000. Hanging off the rear bumper: Trucker Balls. I can’t help but think that i work with retards. [/QUOTE] In the 70’s I worked for Welex in Bakersfield doing down-hole logging (I think that’s what they called it), perforating, and the like. I guarantee you that if these gross things were available then, we’d have had then on out truck. I told a guy in a parking lot that somebody was humping his truck up the ass. I think he wanted to kill me. 😃 Peace, mangeorge ---
**Author:** ![Achren](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/898d66/32.png) [@Achren](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Achren)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2008, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/99 "2008-01-17T04:14:55Z")
This makes me think of the flash video [Gonads and Strife](http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/weeee). (Ok, it’s real name is “Weeeeeeee!” but the gonads and strife was the bit that got me laughing.) ---
**Author:** ![Crocodiles\_And\_Boulevards](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ee7513/32.png) [@Crocodiles\_And\_Boulevards](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crocodiles_And_Boulevards)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2008, 4:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760/100 "2008-01-17T04:44:41Z")
If I wanted to be a real ass to the person behind me, I’d set up a gizmo that looks like a pair of butt cheeks on the back of my truck. If they honk at me, press button on the console and it’ll take a fake crap into a small reservoir jutting from beneath it. It’s like poetry. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/explain-to-me-about-the-red-plastic-testicles-on-the-back-of-this-truck/398760.md?page=6)