# Extraterrestrials arrive - but they don't come to America **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 22, 2009, 12:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131 "2009-12-22T00:18:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![MacSpon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/34f0e0/32.png) [@MacSpon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacSpon)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 12:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131/1 "2009-12-22T00:18:31Z")
Inspired by [this thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=544634). Suppose the aliens come – and decide to ignore the USA and land somewhere else? Suppose they land in Argentina, for example, and can be seen on local TV having cordial meetings with President Kirchner (or whoever)? I know this scenario was touched on in **District 9** , but that film didn’t spend a whole lot of time on the issue. So … how would the US government react? How would US _citizens_ react? (Would this matter?) Especially if the locals at the landing zone seem to be getting on fine with their visitors, and possibly trading information or technology? ---
**Author:** ![MacSpon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/34f0e0/32.png) [@MacSpon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacSpon)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131/2 "2009-12-22T00:33:13Z")
Well, damn. Can a Mod fix the spelling error in the title? Thanks. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 6:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131/3 "2009-12-22T06:04:41Z")
Or better yet . . . suppose they land in Iran or N. Korea. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131/4 "2009-12-22T06:32:25Z")
I’ve got a great idea for a story. So do a lot of other people now, I’m sure. ---
**Author:** ![Declan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecae2f/32.png) [@Declan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Declan)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 9:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131/5 "2009-12-22T09:13:47Z")
> [@MacSpon](#): > > I know this scenario was touched on in **District 9** , but that film didn’t spend a whole lot of time on the issue. So … how would the US government react? How would US _citizens_ react? (Would this matter?) Especially if the locals at the landing zone seem to be getting on fine with their visitors, and possibly trading information or technology? It would depend a lot on the govt of the USA at that particular moment. Potus Nixon may have reacted differently from Potus Clinton. Step one , make sure that there is no threat to Conus Step two , ensure abassadorial relations if I assume that ET likes that particular country or came down in semi controlled fashion and is making the best of a crappy situation. I’l make an assumption on the rest, no matter what information or trade that ET makes, sooner or later its going to migrate to other countries, be it the states or china. If the aliens are a trading race, then they are gonna want the best bang for their buck or shekels and that means that the host nation may have to cede part of their country over to the ET’s as a special economic region. In order of what I would want, assuming a extra terrestrial trading delegation, would be their astrogation data, anything else would simply be decades in reverse engineering or just a better or different way of doing things that we are already doing. Declan ---
**Author:** ![Magiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4491bb/32.png) [@Magiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magiver)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 12:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131/6 "2009-12-22T12:27:48Z")
If Argentina is experiencing a shortage of illegal aliens we can fix that problem quickly. ---
**Author:** ![Noone\_Special](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/noone_special/32/2863_2.png) [@Noone\_Special](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Noone_Special)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 12:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131/7 "2009-12-22T12:40:54Z")
> [@Declan](#): > > I’l make an assumption on the rest, no matter what information or trade that ET makes, sooner or later its going to migrate to other countries, be it the states or china. If the aliens are a trading race, then they are gonna want the best bang for their buck **or shekels** and that means that the host nation may have to cede part of their country over to the ET’s as a special economic region. This. Even ET knows Jerusalem is The Center Of The World! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131/8 "2009-12-22T15:32:04Z")
Send them tapes of old Jerry Springer episodes. They’re bound to see the light. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131/9 "2009-12-22T15:42:46Z")
They come for Slaves: Industrious China, with 1.3 billion people, would provide a ready source. They come for Food: India, with 1 billion people, would seem a likely choice. They come for Ideology: Then wherever they want to land. They come for Resources: No need to land on Earth. They come for Conquest: Again, not much reason to land. At least not until after they’ve nuked certain spots from orbit “just to be sure”. Even then, the logistics of planet wide occupation dictate that they create bases in only a small number of key spots from which to terrorize and dominate the local population. No Klingon occupiers on every corner - that would take many many millions of Klingons. ---
**Author:** ![Frodo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/frodo/32/302_2.png) [@Frodo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frodo)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131/10 "2009-12-22T16:43:02Z")
They already [did](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/El_Eternauta) they knew that once Buenos Aires was in their hands the hard part was done… ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131/11 "2009-12-22T16:44:09Z")
Hell, I’d think we’d attack, on some trumped-up excuse…but then I have grown rather cynical in the wake of the Iraq war. ---
**Author:** ![Astroboy14](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/df705f/32.png) [@Astroboy14](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Astroboy14)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131/12 "2009-12-22T17:03:33Z")
As I established in the other thread, they’re here for women. With that in mind, and given that aliens are bound to be a bit perverted (look at the phallus-shaped rocket ships!), I’m betting they end up in Japan after surfing internet porn for a little while. And the weirdness coming out of Japan won’t change in any way.😃 ---
**Author:** ![Covered\_In\_Bees](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7ab992/32.png) [@Covered\_In\_Bees](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Covered_In_Bees)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131/13 "2009-12-22T17:21:47Z")
> [@Astroboy14](#): > > And the weirdness coming out of Japan won’t change in any way.😃 Well there would be a minor change: tentacle rape porn wouldn’t be limited to drawings and cartoons anymore. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Astroboy14](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/df705f/32.png) [@Astroboy14](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Astroboy14)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131/14 "2009-12-22T18:50:22Z")
> [@Covered\_In\_Bees](#): > > Well there would be a minor change: tentacle rape porn wouldn’t be limited to drawings and cartoons anymore. 😉 Actually, it isn’t now. I’ve seen live-action tentacle porn… :eek: ---
**Author:** ![GIGObuster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gigobuster/32/421_2.png) [@GIGObuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GIGObuster)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131/15 "2009-12-22T21:49:34Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > Send them tapes of old Jerry Springer episodes. They’re bound to see the light. More likely they will then nuke us out of orbit just to make sure that they don’t get infected with the stupid. ---
**Author:** ![Frodo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/frodo/32/302_2.png) [@Frodo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frodo)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131/16 "2009-12-22T22:09:34Z")
> [@GIGObuster](#): > > More likely they will then nuke us out of orbit just to make sure that they don’t get infected with the stupid. It’s the only way to be sure. ---
**Author:** ![MacSpon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/34f0e0/32.png) [@MacSpon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacSpon)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2009, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131/17 "2009-12-23T00:24:47Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > Hell, I’d think we’d attack, on some trumped-up excuse…but then I have grown rather cynical in the wake of the Iraq war. Okay. Suppose the aliens then look at you and say, “Why are you attacking our friends?” ---
**Author:** ![Declan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecae2f/32.png) [@Declan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Declan)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2009, 6:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131/18 "2009-12-23T06:45:44Z")
> [@MacSpon](#): > > Okay. Suppose the aliens then look at you and say, “Why are you attacking our friends?” We draft Hollywood into making a “video inteligence summation” directed by J Cameron, M Bey, and a few others. Give them the GDP of some small shithole to do the video and by the time ET has finished watching it, they are gonna be looking at their friends in a different manner. Declan ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2009, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131/19 "2009-12-23T13:28:48Z")
We send in Torchwood. ---
**Author:** ![TWDuke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e495f1/32.png) [@TWDuke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TWDuke)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2009, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131/20 "2009-12-23T19:41:15Z")
Right now, Torchwood consists of Gwen Cooper. Come to think of it, yeah, send her in. I never cared much for Gwen. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extraterrestrials-arrive-but-they-dont-come-to-america/522131.md?page=2)