# Extrovert Companion Piece **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 24, 2013, 1:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051 "2013-08-24T13:02:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![pancakes3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ba9def/32.png) [@pancakes3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pancakes3)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2013, 1:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051/1 "2013-08-24T13:02:27Z")
> **[15 Unmistakable, Outrageously Secret Signs You're an Extrovert](https://www.gawker.com/15-unmistakable-outrageously-secret-signs-youre-an-ex-1182875137?action_type_map=%7B%2210201093670602033%22%3A%22og.likes%22%7D&fb_action_types=og.likes&fb_source=other_multiline&action_object_map=%7B%2210201093670602033%22%3A617972771558428%7D&action_ref_map=%5B%5D&fb_action_ids=10201093670602033)** > > In recent weeks, introverts have been receiving a lot of attention on the internet, which they hate. Just kidding—they love attention! Talking about, reading about, and Facebook-sharing about introverts are an introvert’s favorite things to do. Of little merit and substance, imho. How say you? ---
**Author:** ![roxie\_monoxide](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/6bbea6/32.png) [@roxie\_monoxide](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/roxie_monoxide)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2013, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051/2 "2013-08-24T14:35:49Z")
The need to show introversion as a pathology is really getting tiresome. All this article says to me is “I am an extrovert, WHY ARE YOU NOT PAYING ATTENTION TO ME!!!” What is wrong with being an extrovert? Well, let’s see… • You seem to think having 1,000 facebook friends means something • Your fear of being alone causes you to jump into relationships that are sad and unfulfilling • You love social media because if you can’t broadcast every thing you feel and do you may cease to exist. • Your need to be involved with everything is not seen as being a go getter, can do kind of person, it makes you look like a hyperactive squirrel on meth. • You will become that person who shares really inappropriate information with strangers because silence is scary • The thought of doing any thing alone fills you with dread because you place a huge amount of value on other people judgment and don’t like to stray from the herd. • You constantly have to be “on” or you might disappear into the crowd and who will validate your need to be a precious flower • Time spent alone might lead to _gasp_ introspection and self awareness Actually line 8 in the article confirms what I said in the beginning Sometimes you do things alone without tweeting “OHHHH MY GODDDD I LOVE TO DO THINGS ALOOOOONE!!! #INTROVERT” is so not an introvert behaviour, it is a perfect example of the extrovert need to be noticed and validated by others. Social awkwardness is not the domain of the introvert and charisma is not the domain of the extrovert. Introversion/extroversion is simply how being around others energizes or depletes you. Extroversion may be the default and socially accepted norm but enough with the need to make a desire for solitude a defect. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2013, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051/3 "2013-08-24T15:10:20Z")
That list is obnoxious. But then again, so are most of the Introvert Lists. I wish people would just be what they are and shut up about it. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2013, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051/4 "2013-08-24T15:14:21Z")
Will no one think of the ambiverts? ---
**Author:** ![Ravenman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ravenman/32/2929_2.png) [@Ravenman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ravenman)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2013, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051/5 "2013-08-24T15:33:34Z")
> [@roxie\_monoxide](#): > > The need to show introversion as a pathology is really getting tiresome. All this article says to me is “I am an extrovert, WHY ARE YOU NOT PAYING ATTENTION TO ME!!!” > > What is wrong with being an extrovert? Well, let’s see… > • You seem to think having 1,000 facebook friends means something > • Your fear of being alone causes you to jump into relationships that are sad and unfulfilling > • You love social media because if you can’t broadcast every thing you feel and do you may cease to exist. > • Your need to be involved with everything is not seen as being a go getter, can do kind of person, it makes you look like a hyperactive squirrel on meth. > • You will become that person who shares really inappropriate information with strangers because silence is scary > • The thought of doing any thing alone fills you with dread because you place a huge amount of value on other people judgment and don’t like to stray from the herd. > • You constantly have to be “on” or you might disappear into the crowd and who will validate your need to be a precious flower > • Time spent alone might lead to _gasp_ introspection and self awareness > > Actually line 8 in the article confirms what I said in the beginning > > Sometimes you do things alone without tweeting “OHHHH MY GODDDD I LOVE TO DO THINGS ALOOOOONE!!! #INTROVERT” > > is so not an introvert behaviour, it is a perfect example of the extrovert need to be noticed and validated by others. > > Social awkwardness is not the domain of the introvert and charisma is not the domain of the extrovert. Introversion/extroversion is simply how being around others energizes or depletes you. > > Extroversion may be the default and socially accepted norm but enough with the need to make a desire for solitude a defect. Cummere and let me give you a hug!! How was your day? No, let me tell you about mine. OOH, what are you eating, can I Instragram it? (BTW: I think you need to look up extrovert in the dictionary; as well as compare and contrast the terms “friendly” with “attention whore.”) ---
**Author:** ![roxie\_monoxide](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/6bbea6/32.png) [@roxie\_monoxide](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/roxie_monoxide)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2013, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051/6 "2013-08-24T18:24:30Z")
Wikipedia - Extraversion is “the act, state, or habit of being predominantly concerned with and obtaining gratification from what is outside the self” Nothing in that list is off base with this definition. Again just because extroversion is the default and social norm doesn’t mean that some of the behaviours don’t have a unhealthy side the list is tongue in cheek. Introverts are portrayed as quiet mumbling antisocial wallflowers that go through life cowering and sulking. I am an introvert but if you asked most people who know me and meet me in various circumstances they will describe me as pleasant, empathetic, inquisitive, a team player and freaking hilarious. But if I am in a state of mind where I don’t want to engage with people, I will exchange the usual pleasantries, ask a few questions and be on my way. I won’t be doing a soft shoe and launching into a monologue about everything that has happened in my life since we last met " How was your day? No, let me tell you about mine" hmmmm friendly? attention whore? got to say I am leaning towards attention whore, no interest or empathy there ---
**Author:** ![Kimmy\_Gibbler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Kimmy\_Gibbler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimmy_Gibbler)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2013, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051/7 "2013-08-24T19:35:59Z")
I love Caity Weaver. Especially “Thatz Not OK” ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2013, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051/8 "2013-08-24T19:57:51Z")
There are pros and cons to everything. One thing I’ve noticed about extroverts is some seem to lack a sense of shame or two way conversation. They either can’t or won’t pick up hints that other people aren’t interested in what they are talking about, or that they find the conversation insulting. Conservation involves a lot of two way verbal and non-verbal signals. Some extroverts are oblivious to the negative signals others give them as a warning, then when people get mad at them they are surprised. One extrovert I know is constantly fighting with people, and it is never her fault (in her view). I might be confusing extroverts with narcissists. ---
**Author:** ![sandra\_nz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eada6e/32.png) [@sandra\_nz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sandra_nz)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2013, 6:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051/9 "2013-08-25T06:25:14Z")
> [@Wesley\_Clark](#): > > There are pros and cons to everything. One thing I’ve noticed about extroverts is some seem to lack a sense of shame or two way conversation. They either can’t or won’t pick up hints that other people aren’t interested in what they are talking about, or that they find the conversation insulting. Conservation involves a lot of two way verbal and non-verbal signals. Some extroverts are oblivious to the negative signals others give them as a warning, then when people get mad at them they are surprised. > > One extrovert I know is constantly fighting with people, and it is never her fault (in her view). > > I might be confusing extroverts with narcissists. I think a lot of people who identify as either introvert or extrovert tend to stereotype the other as the more extreme example (as you have done). I quite like this definition: [Differences between Shy, Introverted, Extroverted, Obnoxious](http://thoughtcatalog.com/2013/the-differences-between-shy-introverted-extroverted-and-obnoxious/) ---
**Author:** ![Napier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ce73a5/32.png) [@Napier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Napier)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2013, 1:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051/10 "2013-08-25T13:25:02Z")
Of little merit and substance. A wry addition to the pile of dubiously worthwhile articles the author was complaining about – or at least it seems wry. Is the author poking fun at themselves? Hard to tell quickly, and not engaging enough to keep working on figuring it out. And, not that anybody asked, but I really like the efforts for introverts (and extroverts) to understand themselves as such. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Panic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/don_t_panic/32/398_2.png) [@Don\_t\_Panic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Panic)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2013, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051/11 "2013-08-25T14:19:47Z")
Oh, well. You know, there are two kinds of people. Those who think there are two kinds of people, and those who don’t. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2013, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051/12 "2013-08-25T14:40:12Z")
So. Intros and Extros get all the attention while us Pervs are ignored? ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Panic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/don_t_panic/32/398_2.png) [@Don\_t\_Panic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Panic)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2013, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051/13 "2013-08-25T15:38:57Z")
[All’s I’m saying.](http://img153.imageshack.us/img153/4494/2lsy.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Tethered\_Kite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a5b964/32.png) [@Tethered\_Kite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tethered_Kite)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2013, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051/14 "2013-08-25T15:47:54Z")
> [@roxie\_monoxide](#): > > Introversion/extroversion is simply how being around others energizes or depletes you. This. How it plays out is the function of other aspects of your personality and social evolution. My husband and I and our daughter and son are all introverts. _We_ think we’re fun. 😛 What’s interesting is that most people would guess that daughter and I are extroverts. ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2013, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051/15 "2013-08-25T17:05:30Z")
What’s great is when you want to be social, and you try to be, but you’re up against exclusive, unbreachable cliques. So you get branded as an introvert, only because you never learned how to win over people who don’t want to be won over. Never being given a chance != introverted. ---
**Author:** ![Tethered\_Kite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a5b964/32.png) [@Tethered\_Kite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tethered_Kite)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2013, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051/16 "2013-08-25T22:11:57Z")
> [@Rilchiam](#): > > What’s great is when you want to be social, and you try to be, but you’re up against exclusive, unbreachable cliques. So you get branded as an introvert, only because you never learned how to win over people who don’t want to be won over. Never being given a chance != introverted. “I don’t want to belong to any club that would accept me as a member.” Groucho Marx 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2013, 4:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051/17 "2013-08-26T04:34:49Z")
What does that have to do with what I said? ---
**Author:** ![Tethered\_Kite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a5b964/32.png) [@Tethered\_Kite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tethered_Kite)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2013, 1:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051/18 "2013-08-26T13:02:28Z")
> [@Rilchiam](#): > > What does that have to do with what I said? Maybe you’re trying for the wrong crowd. If they condescended to accept you how happy would you be with that bunch? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Flywheel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb8c5e/32.png) [@Flywheel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flywheel)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2013, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051/19 "2013-08-26T13:57:14Z")
On the [third hand](http://happyplace.someecards.com/25864/signs-that-you-are-neither-an-introvert-nor-an-extrovert)… ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Panic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/don_t_panic/32/398_2.png) [@Don\_t\_Panic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Panic)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2013, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051/20 "2013-08-26T13:59:39Z")
> [@Flywheel](#): > > On the [third hand](http://happyplace.someecards.com/25864/signs-that-you-are-neither-an-introvert-nor-an-extrovert)… Yeah, but middle-of-the-scale people are boring. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/extrovert-companion-piece/667051.md?page=2)