# Eye surgery jokes / music needed! **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 28, 2018, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231 "2018-11-28T22:32:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Mama\_Zappa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Mama\_Zappa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Zappa)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2018, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231/1 "2018-11-28T22:32:50Z")
Going in for cataract surgery a week from tomorrow, finally!! (now-fired doc kept putting it off for no good reason, finally went to someone else). And as always when I’m terrified, I like to have a few topical jokes handy - distracts ME, if nothing else. I could reuse one [colonoscopy joke](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=15656592&postcount=34) but any others would be appreciated (especially as I’m having the _other_ one done 4 weeks later). And music to listen to on my iPod beforehand… or if the drugs are good enough, to “sing” afterward. A couple of obvious ones would be [I Can See Clearly Now](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FscIgtDJFXg) [Blinded by the Light](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rpq35wyDi7I) ---
**Author:** ![ioioio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ioioio/32/316_2.png) [@ioioio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ioioio)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2018, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231/2 "2018-11-29T03:04:55Z")
[Doctor My Eyes (Jackson Browne)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x0GhjlmlEwQ) ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2018, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231/3 "2018-11-29T03:31:41Z")
[Blue Eyes](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4CiyKeSnSxk)-Elton John [Hungry Eyes](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s---09mo6Ms)-Eric Carmen [Blue Eyes Crying In The Rain](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r8b8I2_Ik3E)-Willie Nelson [Private Eyes](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JsntlJZ9h1U)-Hall and Oates ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2018, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231/4 "2018-11-29T03:39:26Z")
[She Blinded Me With Science](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-FIMvSp01C8)-Thomas Dolby [The First Cut Is The Deepest](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dK9eLe8EQps)-Sheryl Crow [Blinded By The Light](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rpq35wyDi7I)-Manfred Mann [I’m Looking Through You](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gH6i9JAdJrQ)-The Beatles ---
**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2018, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231/5 "2018-11-29T03:45:31Z")
Pink Cataract by Bruce Springsteen ---
**Author:** ![Biotop](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biotop/32/321_2.png) [@Biotop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biotop)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2018, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231/6 "2018-11-29T03:49:37Z")
Wishing you the luck of the Iris! ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2018, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231/7 "2018-11-29T04:18:00Z")
No need to be terrified. My wife just had hers done. The surgery itself is about 10 minutes. They had her on I-don’t-care IV, and everything was numb. She’s thrilled with her new outlook on life. ---
**Author:** ![Defensive\_Indifference](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/defensive_indifference/32/6502_2.png) [@Defensive\_Indifference](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Defensive_Indifference)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2018, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231/8 "2018-11-29T04:27:54Z")
[I Only Have Eyes for You](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FvzNeh4Mq1o&pbjreload=10), by the Flamingos [Behind Blue Eyes](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dMrImMedYRo) by The Who [Windy (“Windy Has Stormy Eyes”)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bPYT9Vyu62A) by the Association ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2018, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231/9 "2018-11-29T04:38:58Z")
[Open My Eyes](https://youtu.be/PjKx-yLOGEY) [Ebony Eyes](https://youtu.be/oUMA8zyuqcs) ---
**Author:** ![Defensive\_Indifference](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/defensive_indifference/32/6502_2.png) [@Defensive\_Indifference](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Defensive_Indifference)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2018, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231/10 "2018-11-29T04:42:27Z")
Are your eyes angry? [Angry Eyes](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0D5NYtc-2zU) ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2018, 6:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231/11 "2018-11-29T06:09:57Z")
Any song by Donnie Iris (such as “[Ah! Leah!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YH5Arbm47IQ)”) would be appropriate. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2018, 6:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231/12 "2018-11-29T06:12:35Z")
Also: [Suite: Judy Blue Eyes](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cMJug2iz3NA), by Crosby, Stills and Nash ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2018, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231/13 "2018-11-29T13:06:36Z")
“Brain Stew” by Green Day. Oh, you know! “My eyes feel like they’re gonna bleed…” Seriously though, good luck on your surgery! ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2018, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231/14 "2018-11-29T13:28:13Z")
Van Morrison, **Brown Eyed Girl**. ---
**Author:** ![Turble](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8dc957/32.png) [@Turble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Turble)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2018, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231/15 "2018-11-29T14:43:48Z")
Oh, great. My cataract surgery is in four hours and the earworm has already started. I can see clearly now … ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2018, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231/16 "2018-11-29T14:46:19Z")
There’s the national anthem (“O say, can you see?”), but then you’d have to stand up. ---
**Author:** ![jerseymule](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jerseymule/32/3155_2.png) [@jerseymule](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jerseymule)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2018, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231/17 "2018-11-29T14:51:46Z")
[What A Wonderful World](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=21LGv8Cf0us) by Louis Armstrong: “I see trees of green, red roses too” and a whole lot more. ---
**Author:** ![Peter\_Morris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peter_morris/32/359_2.png) [@Peter\_Morris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peter_Morris)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2018, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231/18 "2018-11-29T15:26:11Z")
[Everybody Say Eye.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KzlpKGJZ-HU&ytbChannel=null) Are these jokes bad enough, or do you need them cornier? ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanub/32/132_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2018, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231/19 "2018-11-29T15:34:01Z")
[Eye in the Sky](https://www.google.com/search?q=eye+in+the+sky+song&rlz=1C1GCEU_enUS821US821&oq=eye+in+the+sky&aqs=chrome.1.69i57j0l5.5802j0j8&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8) is a pretty and pretty mellow song. [Bette Davis Eyes](https://www.google.com/search?q=bette+davis+eyes&rlz=1C1GCEU_enUS821US821&oq=bette+da&aqs=chrome.1.0l2j69i57j0l3.4136j0j7&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8) is pretty jiggy (though I hope you don’t end up with BD eyes 😛 ). Very best of luck, and tell us how you do when\* [del] the pus clears up and the dizzy spells go away [/del] you’re feeling up to it. - COMPLETELY KIDDING. I know many people who have had it done and all, bar none, have said it’s a snap. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2018, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231/20 "2018-11-29T15:41:50Z")
Hey Mama. Glad you’re moving forward with this. We discussed this a lot in my thread about my surgery. It IS very fast and pain free. It is the most common surgery in the USA. They have got it figured out. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eye-surgery-jokes-music-needed/825231.md?page=2)