# Eyeballs on Stalks or Prehensile Tail? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 4, 2013, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431 "2013-12-04T02:41:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431/1 "2013-12-04T02:41:41Z")
We’re having a sale at the BodyMods Shoppe - big savings on two of our most popular body mods, eyeballs on stalks or a prehensile tail. You can only have one, though, for reasons that make perfect sense. Which do you choose? ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431/2 "2013-12-04T02:46:41Z")
I picked the tail. Prehenisle tails and eyes on stalks both stick out, but if my tail was cut off I could still live with less handicap that if someone chopped my eyes. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431/3 "2013-12-04T02:50:18Z")
But being able to look around corners! Oh yeah, the eyeballs on stalks are able to move around and stretch out and stuff. ---
**Author:** ![thelurkinghorror](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7c8e57/32.png) [@thelurkinghorror](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thelurkinghorror)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431/4 "2013-12-04T03:00:48Z")
A tail you can potentially hide, and it’s useful. Eyes give some advantages, but binocular vision is compromised, and you’ll give everyone a “kill it with fire!” reaction. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431/5 "2013-12-04T03:06:18Z")
I literally cannot count the number of times I’ve joked about and/or wished for an extra hand. A prehensile tail would be a nice alternative, and if my cats are any indication, I’d love to find out what it’s like to be scritched at the base of one’s tail. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![ZenBeam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/3ab097/32.png) [@ZenBeam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZenBeam)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431/6 "2013-12-04T03:18:03Z")
Eyeballs on stalks would be fun for about a day. Each one looks at the other. Make weird eyes at someone. OK, now what? A prehensile tail would be fun as well, but would also be useful. Hold things. Shut doors or drawers when your hands are full. Whip-crack near one of **Cat Whisperer** ’s eyeball on a stalk. Yeah, I’ll take the tail. ---
**Author:** ![Aquadementia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aquadementia/32/555_2.png) [@Aquadementia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aquadementia)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431/7 "2013-12-04T03:26:44Z")
I picked Tail. I always wondered if it would help with rollerblading or running. But I think a second thumb on each hand would come in so _handy_ when I’m working on stuff. ---
**Author:** ![thelurkinghorror](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7c8e57/32.png) [@thelurkinghorror](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thelurkinghorror)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431/8 "2013-12-04T03:43:54Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > I literally cannot count the number of times I’ve joked about and/or wished for an extra hand. A prehensile tail would be a nice alternative, and if my cats are any indication, I’d love to find out what it’s like to be scritched at the base of one’s tail. 😃 Sounds good, but I’d hope an arm comes with that hand! But yeah, a grasping tail is good enough. Bonus if it can hold your weight. > [@ZenBeam](#): > > Eyeballs on stalks would be fun for about a day. Each one looks at the other. Make weird eyes at someone. OK, now what? It would either be cool, or a way to put your brain into a BSOD, if you perceived each eye looking into the other, [Portal-style](http://liztellsfrank.files.wordpress.com/2011/05/portal_mirror-2.jpg). ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431/9 "2013-12-04T04:08:08Z")
Of the two I’d go for the tail due to it being more durable and useful. But I picked “Other Body Mod That I Will Describe”; I’ll go for a second set of arms. > [@Aquadementia](#): > > But I think a second thumb on each hand would come in so _handy_ when I’m working on stuff. I’ve often thought that would be a better design; turn the pinky into a second thumb. In fact, make my second pair of arms like that if I can’t have both pairs that way. ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431/10 "2013-12-04T05:38:24Z")
> [@Der\_Trihs](#): > > Of the two I’d go for the tail due to it being more durable and useful. But I picked “Other Body Mod That I Will Describe”; I’ll go for a second set of arms. . . . You beat me to it, with the only difference that I want two additional sets of arms. (Spiral and Spinnerette are my two very favorite comics characters!) (I also thought that Spider-Man was kinda cool when he sprouted four additional arms…) ---
**Author:** ![ekedolphin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ekedolphin/32/10003_2.png) [@ekedolphin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ekedolphin)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 6:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431/11 "2013-12-04T06:51:46Z")
I went with prehensile tail. Opposable toes or wings would also be nice. In any event, if I had a prehensile tail, even if I was the only person with one, I wouldn’t hide it, I like to think. ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 7:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431/12 "2013-12-04T07:04:12Z")
Years and years ago, I read the “Tarzan” comic strip by Russ Manning, and specifically the sequence where Tarzan encounters the tailed men. Ordinary (caucasian appearing) men and women…with a tail. I was fairly young at the time, but I found the idea strongly sexually arousing. (I’d never heard of Sigmund Freud at the time!) ---
**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 10:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431/13 "2013-12-04T10:23:30Z")
I picked other - I would love gills and to be amphibian. I adore swimming [not enough to become totally aquatic, because I like being on the surface in the air as well. Hard to cook shrimp underwater and I don’t want to be stuck with a life of raw fish.] I suppose I would go for the tail, it would be nice to have effectively a third hand. But I really want to be amphibian. ---
**Author:** ![Atomic\_Alex](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atomic_alex/32/175_2.png) [@Atomic\_Alex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atomic_Alex)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 11:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431/14 "2013-12-04T11:14:37Z")
Wasn’t sure whether this was ‘other’ or not. I want a tail but not prehensile, a big, long, bushy fox-tail _wag wag wag_ 😃 I always thought humanity had been shafted in the tail department. Either that or perky and fully functional fox-ears, major boost in the hearing department. Or how about a functioning canids nose? _(you’d probably have to go for the muzzle as well)_ Now _that_ would be interesting. Goddamit I don’t nose, I mean know. ---
**Author:** ![DSeid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dseid/32/20194_2.png) [@DSeid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DSeid)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 12:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431/15 "2013-12-04T12:14:42Z")
Prehensile tail no question … only problem being what brain real estate does it take from to manage it? It’s got to require as much as a hand does, anyway, and that is a fair amount of brain power. Maybe it comes with its own mini-brain like octopus arms do and only require the broad brushstroke higher brain command of the goal, doing its own processing of how to get it done and reacting reflexively to much else? ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431/16 "2013-12-04T12:39:17Z")
Tail, definitely. Having an extra limb would be useful a lot of the time - carrying things, bracing yourself while you work with both of your hands (e.g. reading a book on the subway), scratching your back, and so on. Eyeballs on stalks would be a novelty, but I think would offer far less utility. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431/17 "2013-12-04T13:24:19Z")
> [@DSeid](#): > > Prehensile tail no question … only problem being what brain real estate does it take from to manage it? It’s got to require as much as a hand does, anyway, and that is a fair amount of brain power. Maybe it comes with its own mini-brain like octopus arms do and only require the broad brushstroke higher brain command of the goal, doing its own processing of how to get it done and reacting reflexively to much else? I’m willing to give it the neural real estate currently occupied by 80’s ad jingles and the memory of that time my skirt got tucked into my pantyhose in the bathroom of a snooty restaurant and I didn’t notice until I’d walked all the way back to my table… ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431/18 "2013-12-04T13:30:16Z")
…these are few of my Favorite Things! ---
**Author:** ![Rachellelogram](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rachellelogram/32/8689_2.png) [@Rachellelogram](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rachellelogram)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431/19 "2013-12-04T13:33:44Z")
One tail, please! I think extra eyes would have more of a learning curve. There would be a lot of accidents until I learned how to process the extra input. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431/20 "2013-12-04T14:33:56Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > …these are few of my Favorite Things! Eyeballs on long stalks and prehensile tails Bloodhound-like noses and razor-sharp nails Full racks of antlers and leathery wings These are a few of my favorite things! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/eyeballs-on-stalks-or-prehensile-tail/675431.md?page=2)