# F$%&ing prove it yourself, bitch! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 21, 2003, 12:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013 "2003-04-21T12:07:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![green\_dragon\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/13edae/32.png) [@green\_dragon\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/green_dragon_1)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 12:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013/1 "2003-04-21T12:07:41Z")
University maths. Theorem, proof, theorem, proof, bloody theorem, proof. It’s coming out of my ears! I JUST DON’T CARE! _mutters_ shoulda done an arts degree _mutters_ And what exactly is the difference between a theorem, a lemma, and a proposition? I have a few sophomore year exams starting in two days and being far more interested in other things, I have barely done any work for them. I’m working at it now, but it’s hard to focus when I don’t actually find the subject that interesting anymore. ARRRGGGGHHHH! My head is going to explode. 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Maximum\_C](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b77776/32.png) [@Maximum\_C](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maximum_C)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 12:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013/2 "2003-04-21T12:20:39Z")
Proposition: Statement to be proven. Proof generally follows. Lemma: Lil’ baby theorem used in proving a larger theorem. Theorem: A statement that can be shown to be true. (When your math teacher says “theorem”, she usually means the whole proof. The proposition becomes a theorem when proof is supplied.) Now get to work, you slacking sod. RESPECT THE MATH. -C ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 12:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013/3 "2003-04-21T12:35:50Z")
Proposition: “Hey, baby. Ya wanna hook up and do the nasty?” Lemma: A small, ring-tailed primate found in Madagascar Theorem: a hypothetical word in Latin ---
**Author:** ![Maximum\_C](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b77776/32.png) [@Maximum\_C](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maximum_C)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013/4 "2003-04-21T12:50:31Z")
I said RESPECT THE MATH. That means you too, missy. Don’t make me come over there and differentiate something you might want to stay integrated. -C ---
**Author:** ![Lsura](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7993a0/32.png) [@Lsura](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lsura)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013/5 "2003-04-21T13:01:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\*I said RESPECT THE MATH. That means you too, missy. > \*\* _sneer_ I’m a librarian. I don’t have to respect math at all. Now just run along and read this fine piece of literature. It’s only 700 pages. > [@](#): > > **Don’t make me come over there and differentiate something you might want to stay integrated.** Promise? ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 1:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013/6 "2003-04-21T13:21:19Z")
Math is not worthy of my respect. How often do I actually give a frog’s fat ass about _x_ and _y_ and what happens if I square their differences? Never, that’s how often. _x_ and _y_ can go jump in the lake, for all I care! Robin ---
**Author:** ![UncaStuart](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/uncastuart/32/404_2.png) [@UncaStuart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncaStuart)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013/7 "2003-04-21T13:52:11Z")
Yeah, and if math is so great, how come I have to go to the dentist every six months and get the calculus scraped off my teeth? ---
**Author:** ![CRorex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CRorex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CRorex)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013/8 "2003-04-21T16:40:43Z")
I was going to say something about how I laugh at the math… Then I realized I use a HECK of a lot of math, from doing dilution calculations, regressions, stats, to calculus for a few choicer problems. On the plus side, if you can muddle through the equations you don’t have to proove crap with math in biology. ---
**Author:** ![Maximum\_C](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b77776/32.png) [@Maximum\_C](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maximum_C)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013/9 "2003-04-21T16:43:20Z")
Math kicks ass. Consider the following: -1 = -1 1/-1 = -1/1…Equivilant to the above statement sqrt(1/-1) = sqrt(-1/1)…Take the square root of both sides sqrt(1)/sqrt(-1) = sqrt(-1)/sqrt(1)…Distribute the root sqrt(1) = sqrt(-1)sqrt(-1)/sqrt(1)…Multiply both sides by sqrt(-1) sqrt(1) = -1 / sqrt(1)…Multiply sqrts together 1 = -1 / 1…Simply square roots. 1 = -1 …Simply further. Doesn’t that just make you happy? -C ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013/10 "2003-04-21T16:45:57Z")
I’m so happy I could just wet my pants. Robin ---
**Author:** ![Maximum\_C](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b77776/32.png) [@Maximum\_C](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maximum_C)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013/11 "2003-04-21T16:53:26Z")
Well, working from the conclusion I just drew above, I can PROVE you wet your pants. 1. Clearly 1 + 1 = 2. 2. So the statment “Either 1 + 1 = 2 or MsRobyn peed her pants” must be true. 3. But 1 = -1 4. So 1 + 1 can be rewritten as 1 - 1, and 1 - 1 = 0. 5. So 1 + 1 =! 2. 6. We already decided “Either 1 + 1 = 2 or MsRobyn peed her pants” must be true. Because 1 + 1 = 2 is false, in order for this statement to be true, the second part must be true. (Law of the Excluded Middle.) 7. Therefore, MsRobyn peed her pants. I recommend a diaper before you attempt any more math today. -C ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013/12 "2003-04-21T17:08:12Z")
A diaper might not be a bad idea. A calculator would be better. Robin ---
**Author:** ![Payton\_s\_Servant](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3da27b/32.png) [@Payton\_s\_Servant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Payton_s_Servant)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013/13 "2003-04-21T17:15:33Z")
Is it time for pie yet? ---
**Author:** ![Sqube](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aca169/32.png) [@Sqube](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sqube)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013/14 "2003-04-21T17:25:51Z")
Damn mathematicians and their tricky ways of proving people peed their pants because what isn’t false is true and the square root of the negative is true and \*_oh my DeityOfChoice THE LEMMINGS ARE COMING FOR MY PANCREASE HELP ME BEFORE IT’S TOO LAT)E(URFWJI)QC)HQOIWD_ There is nothing wrong. Continue enjoying the SDMB. ---
**Author:** ![Juniper200](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@Juniper200](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Juniper200)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013/15 "2003-04-21T17:26:08Z")
When come back, bring pi. ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013/16 "2003-04-21T17:26:55Z")
No, but it’s time for pi. ---
**Author:** ![Elza\_B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Elza\_B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elza_B)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013/17 "2003-04-21T17:42:06Z")
I’m still stuck on the following question from my “Math for Music Majors” course in college: 2+2 = 5. True or False? Off to balance my checkbook by making sure I haven’t bounced anything online. Ava ---
**Author:** ![Q.E.D](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/51bf81/32.png) [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013/18 "2003-04-21T19:37:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Maximum C \* > Math kicks ass. Consider the following: > > -1 = -1 > \*\*1/-1 = -1/1…Equivilant to the above \*\*statement > sqrt(1/-1) = sqrt(-1/1)…Take the square root of both sides > sqrt(1)/sqrt(-1) = sqrt(-1)/sqrt(1)…Distribute the root > sqrt(1) = sqrt(-1)sqrt(-1)/sqrt(1)…Multiply both sides by sqrt(-1) > sqrt(1) = -1 / sqrt(1)…Multiply sqrts together > 1 = -1 / 1…Simply square roots. > 1 = -1 …Simply further. > > Doesn’t that just make you happy? > > -C There’s your problem (in bold). You have to perform the same operation on both sides of the equation. The equation may balance, but that’s just the nature of unity. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Hauky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/0ea827/32.png) [@Hauky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hauky)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013/19 "2003-04-21T19:43:31Z")
But can your fancy math prove where the missing dollar went? ---
**Author:** ![LouisB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@LouisB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LouisB)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013/20 "2003-04-21T20:07:57Z")
What the hell kind of math term is a squirt? And pi = 3, don’t it? So circles ain’t so complicated after all. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/f-ing-prove-it-yourself-bitch/170013.md?page=2)