# Facebook Friends Friending Friends of Friends Who are Strangers - Odd? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 22, 2009, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/facebook-friends-friending-friends-of-friends-who-are-strangers-odd/511051 "2009-09-22T04:55:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Bearflag70](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Bearflag70](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bearflag70)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2009, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/facebook-friends-friending-friends-of-friends-who-are-strangers-odd/511051/1 "2009-09-22T04:55:29Z")
I’m a guy, and about 10 years ago, I had a friend in San Diego. She’s an attractive woman, IMHO. Just friends though. Let’s call her Mary. Mary and I lost touch, I moved from San Diego to Sacramento. I got married. In the last year or so, IRL, my wife and I befriended one of my wife’s co-workers, call her Nancy, and Nancy’s husband, call him Jim. The 4 of us are all Sacramento area residents. My wife and I are both Facebook friends with Nancy and Jim. I reconnected with Mary through FB a few months ago. Mary and I are FB friends now. Turns out, Mary moved from San Diego to Virginia. Mary sent me an email today asking who this guy Jim is because Jim sent her a friend request. She accepted it, thinking Jim was someone from San Diego she had simply forgotten about. I wrote back explaining that Jim is a Sacramento friend of mine and is my wife’s co-worker’s husband. The ONLY connection between Jim and Mary is that each of them is my friend, but they know nothing of each other. I have never even mentioned Mary to Jim or vice versa. Within hours, Jim commented on Mary’s wall because Jim’s child and Mary’s child both happen to be sick this week. My wife and I think Jim is being kinda CREEPY in this situation. I suggested Mary “unfriend” Jim because I think it’s creepy. I have about 110 FB friends. I doubt Jim is sending friend requests to all my FB friends, wholesale. Thus, I can only conclude that Jim singled Mary out for a friend request based solely upon her FB photo on my friends list. What do you think? Is thins some kind of breach of FB etiquette? ---
**Author:** ![ChrisBooth12](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e95f7d/32.png) [@ChrisBooth12](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChrisBooth12)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2009, 6:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/facebook-friends-friending-friends-of-friends-who-are-strangers-odd/511051/2 "2009-09-22T06:02:13Z")
only if it bothers you ---
**Author:** ![Transistor\_Rhythm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/77aa72/32.png) [@Transistor\_Rhythm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Transistor_Rhythm)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2009, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/facebook-friends-friending-friends-of-friends-who-are-strangers-odd/511051/3 "2009-09-22T06:03:57Z")
Is she hot? If so, there’s your answer. ---
**Author:** ![Bearflag70](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Bearflag70](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bearflag70)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2009, 6:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/facebook-friends-friending-friends-of-friends-who-are-strangers-odd/511051/4 "2009-09-22T06:24:21Z")
I just can’t see myself browsing through Nancy’s friends list, finding some hottie, and sending a friend request to a complete stranger. Just seems odd to me. ---
**Author:** ![AboutAsWeirdAsYouCanGet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@AboutAsWeirdAsYouCanGet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AboutAsWeirdAsYouCanGet)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2009, 7:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/facebook-friends-friending-friends-of-friends-who-are-strangers-odd/511051/5 "2009-09-22T07:19:49Z")
Oh lord this happened to me. Back when FB was still college only, you could see everyone on the college network. Some guy who was the resident of my friend who was an RA, facebooked me b/c he thought I was cute. OMG…that was HORRIBLE. He had NO social skills. He’d randomly IM me ALL THE FREAKING TIME. He would constantly ask to cyber, he was always going " when you come up to visit we can play"…VERY OOGY!!! _shudders_ He even told me he thought he loved me?!? Then right after that, he was all "I’m sorry, but who is this?"I blocked him right after that. ---
**Author:** ![Lunchy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Lunchy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lunchy)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2009, 9:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/facebook-friends-friending-friends-of-friends-who-are-strangers-odd/511051/6 "2009-09-22T09:08:33Z")
I believe you may be reading into it too much! ---
**Author:** ![Scougs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scougs/32/3158_2.png) [@Scougs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scougs)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2009, 9:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/facebook-friends-friending-friends-of-friends-who-are-strangers-odd/511051/7 "2009-09-22T09:24:51Z")
Facebook “suggests” friends of friends to each other. Some people feel validated by the number of friends they have, and use every suggestion to build their friend lists. It’s probably as simple as that. ---
**Author:** ![dalej42](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/67e7ee/32.png) [@dalej42](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dalej42)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2009, 12:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/facebook-friends-friending-friends-of-friends-who-are-strangers-odd/511051/8 "2009-09-22T12:28:39Z")
I think you’re reading way too much into it. I will often friend people I don’t know if we have another friend in common. Typically, I tend to friend people who I see making frequent comments. I don’t feel bad if they don’t accept. Still, it’s your facebook. If it does bother you, then defriend them. If someone I don’t know posts something about their child being sick, I’d probably post, “Hope they get better soon!” or something like that. Of course, if someone I don’t know starts posting endless political rants or nutjob anti-vaccine stuff, I’d defriend them in a heartbeat. I don’t want to post, “I’m sick” and then come home to read a three paragraph rant about how when I get sick under Obama’s health care plan… ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2009, 12:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/facebook-friends-friending-friends-of-friends-who-are-strangers-odd/511051/9 "2009-09-22T12:43:17Z")
I have two FOAF Friends on Facebook (out of 100 or so total), both of whom friended me after we found each other amusing when posting comments on the mutual friend’s page. It’s not a biggie; it’s just the occasional bit of typing. Mary needs to make up her own mind whether it’s creepy. ---
**Author:** ![Bearflag70](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Bearflag70](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bearflag70)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2009, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/facebook-friends-friending-friends-of-friends-who-are-strangers-odd/511051/10 "2009-09-22T14:52:50Z")
Thanks for the input,folks. Just to be clear, I wasn’t going to unfriend him. I suggested that Mary unfriend him. Apparently, she did. ---
**Author:** ![Bearflag70](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Bearflag70](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bearflag70)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2009, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/facebook-friends-friending-friends-of-friends-who-are-strangers-odd/511051/11 "2009-09-22T14:55:59Z")
> [@Scougs](#): > > Facebook “suggests” friends of friends to each other. Some people feel validated by the number of friends they have, and use every suggestion to build their friend lists. > > It’s probably as simple as that. I forgot about that feature. I can see that happening. I still think it’s a bit creepy to send a friend request to a total stranger just because the recommended friend is a hot chick. Maybe it’s just me. ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2009, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/facebook-friends-friending-friends-of-friends-who-are-strangers-odd/511051/12 "2009-09-22T15:06:58Z")
You know you’re getting old when new verbs like ‘facebook’ and ‘unfriend’ surface. :eek:😉