# Fact: Same Sex Marriage is now legal in all states **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 13, 2014, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371 "2014-05-13T18:53:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Hari\_Seldon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hari_seldon/32/5173_2.png) [@Hari\_Seldon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hari_Seldon)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 11:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371/21 "2014-05-14T11:27:54Z")
Downside: God will punish us by raising the global temperature, causing more hurricanes, tornadoes, floods and burying coastal areas. See if that doesn’t happen. The only way to prevent that is to burn more coal; God loves CO2. ---
**Author:** ![leahcim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b4bc9f/32.png) [@leahcim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/leahcim)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371/22 "2014-05-14T12:48:14Z")
For the worse: Gay [clutter](http://boingboing.net/2013/05/31/billboard-gay-marriage-ga.html). ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371/23 "2014-05-14T12:53:20Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > In this scenario it was been decided that same sex marriage is now legal in all 50 states. > What changes for the better? > What changes for the worse? It depends on how the change came about. If it was mandated by the SCOTUS, then Democrats are going to have a more difficult time keeping the presidency. I guess that’s either good or bad depending on your political beliefs. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371/24 "2014-05-14T12:59:32Z")
> [@Simplicio](#): > > I’ve seen a decent number of older gay-people mourn the decline of a lot of gay-culture and gay institutions that were created back when being openly gay was taboo. I imagine that decline will continue as the last big institutional barrier against gays ends. > > Granted I doubt even people who feel that way would really call it “worse”. The change is certainly for the better. But I think its natural for marginalized groups to set up and become attached to their own cultural practices and institutions, and then miss feel nostalgic for those institutions as they lose their purpose once the group ceases to be marginalized. I could be one of those people . . . except that I’m not. As I said before, SSM will not be the end of homophobia, and in fact never was the “institutional barrier” than it has been in the last few years. There have always been other issues, and there will continue to be in the near future. Political solutions are the result of cultural changes, not the cause. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 1:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371/25 "2014-05-14T13:12:12Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > In this scenario it was been decided that same sex marriage is now legal in all 50 states. > What changes for the better? > What changes for the worse? How about ‘Scenario:’ or ‘Suppose’ or ‘Hypothetical:’ instead of ‘Fact:’ ? I opened this thread expecting a defense of a claim that due to various court decisions, SSM is or will shortly be effectively legal across the U.S. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371/26 "2014-05-14T13:13:53Z")
Hypothetical lame downside: The door is now open for people to start work on legalizing polygamous marriages, which would upset a great many legal situations concerning ownership of property, parental rights and inheritance, and it would really piss off the Mormons. > [@RTFirefly](#): > > How about ‘Scenario:’ or ‘Suppose’ or ‘Hypothetical:’ instead of ‘Fact:’ ? > > I opened this thread expecting a defense of a claim that due to various court decisions, SSM is or will shortly be effectively legal across the U.S. There have been a couple like this lately; I think people are using this as shorthand for “Hey, I’ve got an idea for something to discuss and I’d REALLY like it if people didn’t just fight the hypothetical like we always do, so let’s just take it as a given that…” Plus, you’d think if all 50 states had suddenly decided to legalize SSM, it would be on CNN or something like that. ---
**Author:** ![GreasyJack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/df705f/32.png) [@GreasyJack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GreasyJack)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 1:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371/27 "2014-05-14T13:25:23Z")
One very minor downside: there were some situations in which the not-quite-marriage civil unions/domestic partnerships came in handy for opposite sex couples. For example, widows with pensions or other survivor benefits that would expire in the case of remarriage could enter into a domestic partnership and get the benefits of medical visitation, end-of-life decisions, etc without losing those survivor benefits. In at least some states, the domestic partnerships/civil unions have just been automatically converted to marriages, so I’m not sure exactly what happened to opposite sex couples who took advantage of them. ---
**Author:** ![Ulf\_the\_Unwashed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Ulf\_the\_Unwashed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ulf_the_Unwashed)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371/28 "2014-05-14T13:31:44Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > Plus, you’d think if all 50 states had suddenly decided to legalize SSM, it would be on CNN or something like that. Not CNN. They’re too busy looking for that plane. ---
**Author:** ![nevadaexile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb8c5e/32.png) [@nevadaexile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nevadaexile)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371/29 "2014-05-14T13:33:03Z")
Noticeable downside: Many long-term SSM relationships would breakup. It seems that when many gays are allowed to marry, they either don’t or the relationship that they have seems to end within a few years. Not certain why this occurs. Perhaps the “chase” is better than the “kill.” ---
**Author:** ![Ulf\_the\_Unwashed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Ulf\_the\_Unwashed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ulf_the_Unwashed)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371/30 "2014-05-14T13:46:23Z")
> [@nevadaexile](#): > > Noticeable downside: Many long-term SSM relationships would breakup. It seems that when many gays are allowed to marry, they either don’t **or the relationship that they have seems to end within a few years.** Do you have a cite for this? The bolded part especially seems difficult to justify, particularly since “a few years” is longer than almost all gays have been allowed to marry. ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371/31 "2014-05-14T14:00:44Z")
> [@GreasyJack](#): > > One very minor downside: there were some situations in which the not-quite-marriage civil unions/domestic partnerships came in handy for opposite sex couples. For example, widows with pensions or other survivor benefits that would expire in the case of remarriage could enter into a domestic partnership and get the benefits of medical visitation, end-of-life decisions, etc without losing those survivor benefits. > > In at least some states, the domestic partnerships/civil unions have just been automatically converted to marriages, so I’m not sure exactly what happened to opposite sex couples who took advantage of them. I don’t think that they automatically converted in any states. Couples would have to actually get a marriage license regardless of whether or not they had a domestic partnership. In CA at least, the other kind of domestic partnership will stay in place for the reasons that you gave (pension issues) and have nothing to do with SSM anyway. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371/32 "2014-05-14T14:14:37Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > There have been a couple like this lately; I think people are using this as shorthand for “Hey, I’ve got an idea for something to discuss and I’d REALLY like it if people didn’t just fight the hypothetical like we always do, so let’s just take it as a given that…” Yeah, and some people use ‘literally’ where they mean ‘figuratively’ but eroding the distinction doesn’t exactly help people communicate clearly. > [@](#): > > Plus, you’d think if all 50 states had suddenly decided to legalize SSM, it would be on CNN or something like that. Maybe you should read my post again? ETA: The part that goes “due to various court decisions, SSM is **or will shortly be** effectively legal across the U.S.” (Bolding added.) Given the way court decisions have been running lately, it would be a defensible claim. ---
**Author:** ![GreasyJack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/df705f/32.png) [@GreasyJack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GreasyJack)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371/33 "2014-05-14T14:17:53Z")
> [@hajario](#): > > I don’t think that they automatically converted in any states. Couples would have to actually get a marriage license regardless of whether or not they had a domestic partnership. In CA at least, the other kind of domestic partnership will stay in place for the reasons that you gave (pension issues) and have nothing to do with SSM anyway. I know Washington State did, but looking at the notice [here](http://www.sos.wa.gov/corps/domesticpartnerships/Notice-regarding-same-sex-marriage-and-domestic-partnerships.aspx),it looks like only same-sex ones are getting converted automatically. I hadn’t realized that the law only allowed for opposite sex domestic partnerships if one of the people was over 62. It looks like that will also still remain an option, but I’m not sure if that’s the case in every state, though. ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371/34 "2014-05-14T14:29:00Z")
> [@GreasyJack](#): > > I know Washington State did, but looking at the notice [here](http://www.sos.wa.gov/corps/domesticpartnerships/Notice-regarding-same-sex-marriage-and-domestic-partnerships.aspx),it looks like only same-sex ones are getting converted automatically. I hadn’t realized that the law only allowed for opposite sex domestic partnerships if one of the people was over 62. It looks like that will also still remain an option, but I’m not sure if that’s the case in every state, though. I just looked it up. WA same sex domestic partnerships are treated the same legally as same sex marriages within the State but weren’t converted to actual marriages. I don’t think that this is a distinction without a difference because an actual marriage would have to happen in order to get Federal benefits. BTW, it’s the same in CA for opposite sex domestic partnerships. One of the couple has to be older than a certain age. I suppose that there can also still be a same sex domestic partnership with one of them over 62 for the same reason. ---
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371/35 "2014-05-14T17:16:23Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > In this scenario it was been decided that same sex marriage is now legal in all 50 states. > What changes for the better? > What changes for the worse? Better: More equality and rights for people Worse: We don’t get to have these scintillating conversations with people debating gay marriage which is pretty much a given. Its kind of fun to debate from the position of knowing your side is right and I’m going to miss that for this topic. Oh well, I suppose there’s always robot masturbation ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371/36 "2014-05-14T17:19:19Z")
> [@Lord\_Feldon](#): > > A lawmaker in Oklahoma has already proposed [abolishing civil marriage](http://www.newson6.com/story/24543033/lawmakers-consider-preventing-all-marriage-in-oklahoma) to spite gay people. It doesn’t seem to be a very popular idea…so far. You’d think. But there were places fifty years ago that shut down their schools rather than integrate them. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371/37 "2014-05-14T17:23:14Z")
> [@nevadaexile](#): > > Noticeable downside: Many long-term SSM relationships would breakup. It seems that when many gays are allowed to marry, they either don’t or the relationship that they have seems to end within a few years. Not certain why this occurs. > > Perhaps the “chase” is better than the “kill.” A few of the high profile couples did divorce within a few years. I would attribute that more to the stress of multi-year legislation and being thrust into the limelight than just ‘oh, the chase is over’. ---
**Author:** ![Hershele\_Ostropoler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e47c2d/32.png) [@Hershele\_Ostropoler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hershele_Ostropoler)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371/38 "2014-05-14T19:31:50Z")
> [@XT](#): > > Same sex marriage couples will now have to deal with the same issues of divorce and such that straight couples have to deal with. 😛 On the contrary, it’s next to impossible to dissolve a union that never existed in the first place. All that stuff currently has to be resolved by detailed and protracted negotiations between people who by definition aren’t getting along all that well. Divorce has processes and precedents. Divorce is one of the benefits of marriage. > [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > I don’t know if there’s such a term for men who previously would have married lesbians, but given that the women are named as if they provide a gay man with a secondary sexual characteristic befitting a man, I suggest that men who marry lesbians be called boobs, and should likewise sue. I’ve been saying “ponytail” on the rare occasion that I need such a term, though I realize men can have ponytails too. > [@Antinor01](#): > > A few of the high profile couples did divorce within a few years. I would attribute that more to the stress of multi-year legislation and being thrust into the limelight than just ‘oh, the chase is over’. And I think people who aren’t on board with SSM like to point to same-sex divorce and say “see, they divorced, so they shouldn’t have been allowed to marry in the first place” ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371/39 "2014-05-14T19:39:11Z")
> [@Antinor01](#): > > A few of the high profile couples did divorce within a few years. I would attribute that more to the stress of multi-year legislation and being thrust into the limelight than just ‘oh, the chase is over’. Human nature being what it is, I imagine some of the couples knew they shouldn’t get married, but by the time all of the hullaballoo was over, they felt in a sense obligated. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371/40 "2014-05-14T19:41:50Z")
> [@Hershele\_Ostropoler](#): > > I’ve been saying “ponytail” on the rare occasion that I need such a term, though I realize men can have ponytails too. You could call them “Subarus”, but maybe that’s a Berkeley thing. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fact-same-sex-marriage-is-now-legal-in-all-states/688371.md?page=3)