# Fake books I wouldn't mind reading **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 30, 2003, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203 "2003-04-30T18:52:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![thi6](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e99b99/32.png) [@thi6](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thi6)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203/1 "2003-04-30T18:52:45Z")
Such as: _Deathslaker_ by Simon Green, the first book of his Deathslaker series. _Renegades of Fern_ by Anne McCaffrey. A new series, how exciting. It must be about genetically engineered plants used to fight off the menace from the underground caves of Fern, a planet colonized by environmentalists banished from Earth in the future. (I wish people would double check these lists before printing them out in mass quantities and sending them to libraries, who then get volunteers like myself to wade through them to find out what they have. Funny, we don’t have either of the above.) I am also guilty of misreading book titles at first glance. I was convinced there was a book called _The Invisible Map_. I don’t remember what the title actually turned out to be (it wasn’t the Invisible Man 🙂 ), but now I’ve imagined a children’s book about a map that you can only see with your eyes closed. Maybe I’ll write it myself. Does anyone else do this? ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203/2 "2003-04-30T18:58:53Z")
I’d like to have read “Blood on the Badge,” the cop thriller that Harris was always working on in “Barney Miller.” ---
**Author:** ![Scarlett67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlett67/32/7387_2.png) [@Scarlett67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlett67)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203/3 "2003-04-30T19:19:25Z")
_Hamster Huey and the Gooey Kablooie!_ ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203/4 "2003-04-30T19:25:01Z")
Bimbos of the Death Sun. Not the actual novel, but the novel that the character in the novel wrote. That one. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203/5 "2003-04-30T19:29:17Z")
Qadgop the Mercotan by Sybly Whyte. Those few tantalizing sentences which were made public were just enough to incite my imagination! ---
**Author:** ![Tusculan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecd19e/32.png) [@Tusculan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tusculan)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203/6 "2003-04-30T20:16:01Z")
Most works mentioned by Jorge Luis Borges. He describes a lot of fictional books in his short stories. On top on the list: A first Encyclopaedia of Tlön (in _Tlön, Uqbar, Orbis Tertius_). ---
**Author:** ![DreadCthulhu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/db5fbb/32.png) [@DreadCthulhu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DreadCthulhu)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203/7 "2003-04-30T21:23:51Z")
First person who says the Necromonicon isn’t real will have to face the wrath of me. ---
**Author:** ![CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crankyasanoldman/32/11670_2.png) [@CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrankyAsAnOldMan)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203/8 "2003-04-30T21:36:09Z")
“How To Hypnotize Your Boss Into Giving You A Huge Raise” ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203/9 "2003-04-30T21:39:54Z")
In _The World According to Garp_, the title character is an author and there is mention of some of the novels and stories this character writes. There are even some passages from these stories included in the real novel, but I remember that as I was reading _Garp_ I kept thinking, “I’d really like to read more of what Garp has written.” Even though he’s just a fictional character. ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203/10 "2003-04-30T21:48:32Z")
In _The World According to Garp_, the title character is an author and there is mention of some of the novels and stories this character writes. There are even some passages from these stories included in the real novel, but I remember that as I was reading _Garp_ I kept thinking, “I’d really like to read more of what Garp has written.” Even though he’s just a fictional character. ---
**Author:** ![Ich\_Bin\_s](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Ich\_Bin\_s](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ich_Bin_s)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203/11 "2003-04-30T21:52:57Z")
I suppose **The King In Yellow** wouldn’t be a bad one to have on the shelf. But then I’d get tempted to read it and fall into an opium stupor, unaware that the undead dwelling-challenged individual I’d passed every night was creeping into my house on broken fingers to kill me. Or something. ---
**Author:** ![Daniel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Daniel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daniel)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203/12 "2003-04-30T22:00:21Z")
Don’t let Philip Jose Farmer see this thread . . . last time he heard of a fake book (Venus on the Half Shell by Kilgore Trout), he actually bothered to write it himself. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203/13 "2003-04-30T22:03:00Z")
All those damned stories in _If on a winter’s night a traveller_ that never get finished (yes, I know that’s the point, but even so…) ---
**Author:** ![RawkStah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/46a35a/32.png) [@RawkStah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RawkStah)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203/14 "2003-04-30T22:50:21Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Scarlett67 \* > \*\*_Hamster Huey and the Gooey Kablooie!_ \*\* Again? Look at all these other books you have! _Timequake One_ by Kurt Vonnegut sounded damned cool. I don’t remember why he only wound up publishing the sequel. _Buttercup’s Baby_ by Stephen King. The citizens of Florin decided that King would be a better person to translate the sequel to _The Princess Bride_ after William Goldman butchered the original. All the spread beavers must make anything by Kilgore Trout a good read… I’m guessing that all the books by Princess Irulan would be interesting. So would the Bene Gesserit manuals. The Wudan Mountain Fighting Manual that Jade Fox couldn’t read… I MUST get that! ---
**Author:** ![penny\_dreadful](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/71c47a/32.png) [@penny\_dreadful](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/penny_dreadful)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203/15 "2003-04-30T23:05:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by thi6 \* > \*\*I am also guilty of misreading book titles at first glance. I was convinced there was a book called _The Invisible Map_. I don’t remember what the title actually turned out to be (it wasn’t the Invisible Man 🙂 ), but now I’ve imagined a children’s book about a map that you can only see with your eyes closed. Maybe I’ll write it myself. > > Does anyone else do this? \*\* I do this all the time, but I can only think of one incident at the moment: After spending way too much time at a Sanrio shop, I went into the nearby book store. I saw [Chocolat](http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/014100018X/qid=1051743812/sr=2-1/ref=sr_2_1/104-6211069-5615150), and my first thought was, “Wow, someone wrote a novel about [Chococat](http://www.sanrio.com/main/charactersection/co.html) !” As for books that are only alluded to in other works of literature, TV shows, etc.: I’d really like to read _Charlotte Light and Dark_ from _Six Feet Under_. ---
**Author:** ![penny\_dreadful](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/71c47a/32.png) [@penny\_dreadful](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/penny_dreadful)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203/16 "2003-04-30T23:40:46Z")
Speaking of _Six Feet Under_, I’d also probably like the “Nathaniel and Isabel” books. They sound very Lemony Snickety. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203/17 "2003-05-01T00:19:30Z")
Tobin’s _Spirit Guide_. I wanted to be Egon Spengler when I grew up. ---
**Author:** ![MyFootsZZZ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/myfootszzz/32/12580_2.png) [@MyFootsZZZ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MyFootsZZZ)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203/18 "2003-05-01T00:20:57Z")
JOSE CHUNG’S _“FROM OUTER SPACE”_ from **“The X-Files”**. ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203/19 "2003-05-01T00:29:18Z")
_The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy_ (I mean the electronic version mentioned in the novel.) ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203/20 "2003-05-01T00:41:45Z")
The 100 or so Sherlock Holmes stories that Dr. Watson mentioned but never bothered to have published. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fake-books-i-wouldnt-mind-reading/172203.md?page=2)