# Faking your own death to get back at your girlfriend **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 2, 2003, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212 "2003-09-02T21:32:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![anya\_marie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@anya\_marie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anya_marie)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 7:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212/41 "2003-09-03T07:16:23Z")
I find that amazingly twisted and warped for a breakup, that from the looks of it was two people drifting apart. I had to re-read it to understand how it went down. Although i can’t imagine doing anything like it to a person i had dated, as much as i can be an asshole. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212/42 "2003-09-03T07:25:02Z")
Hmmm **SPOOFE** is “good buddy” of Dick but does not know of Dick’s plan?😕 ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 7:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212/43 "2003-09-03T07:39:53Z")
First off, the names are pseudonyms. Second, source of info is me buddy Flip, who heard it from Shirley. And he’s been keeping me up-to-date on things. Third, yeah, as far as I’m aware, that’s how things happened. No, as far as I’m aware, all information came through the family, which, as we now know, was making it all up (to what end, I dunno). I’m also not aware of any newspaper confirmation, which I’m now kicking myself for not having checked (although a disappearing teenager ain’t exactly as big as Gary Coleman’s governorship candidacy). Fourth, I didn’t press to hard for details. I’ll get some more info in the next day or two. I was just amazingly miffed when I heard how things turned out (it was a pretty harsh bit of news in my circle of friends). And fifth, if I wanted to make things up, I’d have involved monkeys somehow. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 7:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212/44 "2003-09-03T07:43:47Z")
Change of smiley:eek: ---
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7bcc69/32.png) [@Mighty\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Girl)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 7:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212/45 "2003-09-03T07:57:01Z")
I am torn between “I can’t believe this” and “what and incredibly dastardly thing to do”. There must be some law around that can be thrown at this bunch of sickos. On a related note: A couple of years ago there was a somewhat similar incident here. After a heated discussion and the customary “pretend that I am dead” thrown at a dickhead boyfriend, he went ahead and had the most-read newspaper publish an invitation for her memorial. After everything came out he just said he was following her advice. The newspaper apologized and started demanding people brought death certificates before publishing something like that. I don’t know what happened to the idiot, I just hope he is somewhere suffering from one painful disease or other. ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 9:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212/46 "2003-09-03T09:22:54Z")
Wait, they were teenagers? In that case, was it really Mom’s idea\*? Where was he missing **from**? I was going to ask, “What about his job?” but if they’re high school or college students, his absence from school would be moot. Still, where was he when all this was going on? And how many people were in on it vs. the number of people who got the “he’s missing” story? \*I once started a Pit thread about an exchange with my mom. I had worked a double shift, and said to her on the phone, “So I came home and basically died for six hours…” After a loud silence, she said, “Don’t ever say that.” I started the thread because I thought she’d overreacted, but I was told that one should not **EVER** joke about death with one’s mom. And here’s this woman faking her own child’s death. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![d\_redguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/5fc32e/32.png) [@d\_redguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/d_redguy)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 10:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212/47 "2003-09-03T10:03:21Z")
I really hope that this isn’t true. I really really really do. My heebee-jeebee-acid-flashback-style-bells-and-whistles are going off about this story. So I hope that someone got this story fucked up somewhere along the way. But this does have UL written all over it. No offense, **SPOOFE** , but you do realize that in the telling of this drama on the SDMB, you have achieved FOAF status, right? I mean, we all know you ain’t no troll (I mean, c’mon, it’s **SPOOFE!** ), so we know you aren’t lying. But man, I really hope you are mistaken somehow. :brrr: God, though. That just gives me chills. How evil can people be? What makes the whole damn thing so scary is how easy it is for me to believe. I mean, there _could_ be people out there who really are that twisted. So, true or not, you’ve busted the gauge on my Creep-O-Meter this morning, **SPOOFE**. Thanks. I was gonna go to bed in about two hours, too. ☹ 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 11:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212/48 "2003-09-03T11:08:33Z")
Sounds like Shirley was well out of the relationship; imagine what her life might have been like if she’d married the guy. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 11:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212/49 "2003-09-03T11:19:09Z")
In a world of fuckedupness, that scores about 82 on my fuckedupometer. ---
**Author:** ![BoBettie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 11:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212/50 "2003-09-03T11:58:57Z")
> [@](#): > > And fifth, if I wanted to make things up, I’d have involved monkeys somehow Now THAT would be one hell of a story! Anyway, I wanted to pop in and say I really did not mean to imply that you are sitting there making up stories. I meant that however you got your info may not be reliable or factual. I didn’t mean for it to come off the way it did. ---
**Author:** ![Eats\_Crayons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Eats\_Crayons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eats_Crayons)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 12:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212/51 "2003-09-03T12:06:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by ooga booga \* > \*\*I’m siding with **Zette** here. My shenanigans meter is reading off the scale here…until proven otherwise, I’m convinced that someone fed you a real good story, **SPOOFE**. \*\* You know, I would just about agree with you… But then I thought of _The Jamie Kennedy Experiment_ and thought to myself “I can see how someone could be prusuaded that it’s all in good ‘fun’.” I don’t really, I think some of those shows are undeniably cruel, but with such a precendent, some seriously fucked up people could delude themselves into thinking they’d done a prank worthy of a TV show. Bastards. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 12:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212/52 "2003-09-03T12:18:32Z")
Or what about that terrible program presented by that gormless (yet ratehr attractive) bint Shannen Doherty? What’s that called again? That certainly sounds like it could inspire such fuckeduposity. (Not that I’m blaming the show - fuckedupracitomy would probably have happened anyway with such people.) ---
**Author:** ![paulberserker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c4cdca/32.png) [@paulberserker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/paulberserker)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212/53 "2003-09-03T12:45:43Z")
to me, this scam rocks. i would be doing this right now to the ex mrs berserker, if i ever thought i could convince my mother to make that phone call. it does smack of UL though hmmm, talking of which, maybe i should pit my ex. not that it would make any difference as shes not on the SDMB. “Hi mum, listen, i wonder if you could…” ---
**Author:** ![SpaceDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spacedog/32/9932_2.png) [@SpaceDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpaceDog)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212/54 "2003-09-03T12:59:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by LilyoftheValley \* > \*\*Damn, I was hoping to find out that I had missed the words “Urban Legend” somewhere in the OP. **SPOOFE** , that is truly sick…especially the part where everyone _laughed_ at her! \*\* But you just know this going to end up as an Urban Legend anyway, all it needs is an appropriate moral ending, i.e. he dies anyway or she shoots him on the spot or … > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mr. Miskatonic \* > **"…then she mentioned that she gave her friends the key to his place and told them they could have his furniture if they picked it up that afternoon."** that would work nicely. I can’t help feeling we’ve not got the whole story. I could see someone maybe, in a drunken fit of rage or self-pity, thinking up this scheme. But to go through with it and get family and friends to help I just can’t see that. Someone, somewhere at some point during the fiasco must have realised what a truely awful thing they were doing I can’t see why they didn’t tell Dick to stop being a dick or do something else. Frankly I can’t imagine that a group of people could be found who would all willing let this happend and apparently endorse and enjoy it. That’s some fucked up folks right there. Sorry about your friend **SPOOFE**. SD Who’s mind is still boggleing (sp?) ---
**Author:** ![cheesepickles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/57b2e6/32.png) [@cheesepickles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cheesepickles)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212/55 "2003-09-03T13:13:02Z")
Awesome! this guy rocks! i love stunts like that but if what you say is true i have to hand it to such a sick yet creative fucker who would try something like that. i am of the opinion that all of life is absurd one way or another…who says we can’t joke about death? Also, it half-proves u can fake your own death, within a certain degree. Rock on, Dick. I wonder what his next stunt will be… ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 1:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212/56 "2003-09-03T13:21:09Z")
_Scare Tactics_, that’s the show. It’s full of stunts like that. Aside: it’s just occurred to me - Shannen is clearly of Irish-American heritage. If her parents were going to name her after an Irish river, you’d think they’d **look the fucking thing up in an atlas** and spell it right, wouldn’t you? ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212/57 "2003-09-03T13:36:18Z")
Maybe I could see one guy trying to pull something like this. But I can’t imagine him convincing anyone else to play along. Was she some sort of evil pscho hosebeast who only thought of herself? If she was so evil, why would they think she would care if the dude was dead? I, too, think it’s a case of shenanigans. No way moms went along with it. ---
**Author:** ![ArtyDooDoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/13edae/32.png) [@ArtyDooDoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ArtyDooDoo)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212/58 "2003-09-03T13:47:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Manatee \* > \*\*Nothing to add, except for the fact that my in-laws are named Dick and Shirley. > > For real. > > It added a whole other level of surreality to SPOOFE’s story for me. \*\* My parents neighbours are Dick and Shirley too. Do your inlaws go to Florida for the winter? ---
**Author:** ![sperfur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9adbd/32.png) [@sperfur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sperfur)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212/59 "2003-09-03T13:59:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SPOOFE \* > \*\*And fifth, if I wanted to make things up, I’d have involved monkeys somehow. \*\* And underpants. Don’t forget the underpants. ---
**Author:** ![Skerri](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f04885/32.png) [@Skerri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skerri)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212/60 "2003-09-03T14:42:25Z")
My ex-boyfriend played a similar trick on me. He didn’t go as far as having a wake for himself, but I’m thinking right now he wishes he really WAS dead. He moved to a city 100 miles from where I and most of his friends were living. He then got one of his ‘new’ friends to call back home to tell us he was dead. Apparently he was “shot in the face” during a bad drug deal. He did this to get certain people off his back, and to see how I would react. I reacted appropriately at the time, as I went into the bar and bought a round for my friends. (This was the same guy that beat the crap out of me the night before I left him.) We toasted to “dead motherfuckers!” and I went home. At some point, it started affecting me, because I didn’t sleep through the night once in six months. I had nightmares every night that he was coming into my bedroom and talking to me. I thought I was going insane. I was ready to seek the treatment of a psychiatrist when I found out it was all a big joke and he did it to see what I would say. None of our mutual friends know about the no-sleep thing, so he got no satisfaction out of it. When we all found out that it was a big lie, most of my friends decided that if he showed his face anywhere, it would be trouble. And I started sleeping regularly, knowing that there’s some guy out there probably beating the crap out of his new girlfriend. I wonder how I’ll feel when he really dies. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faking-your-own-death-to-get-back-at-your-girlfriend/199212.md?page=4)