No, it’s not the same thing. As shown above, there are, in reality, four equally likely ways to end up with two kids. And of those, there are three equally likely ways to end up with two kids, one of which is a daughter. But if you say he has a daughter and his wife’s pregnant, then there are only two equally likely ways to end up with two kids, one of which is a daughter - you’ve eliminated the possibility of him already having a son and his wife being pregnant with a daughter.
You’re absolutely right - the fact that someone has a daughter has no bearing on whether or not they also have a son. It seems like that’s what is being claimed here. But it’s not.
The problem is, odds are never absolute, only relative. The odds of anything happening depend on how you define the context in which it happens. In my line of work, data analysis, we call this context a “universe”. If you alter your universe, you alter the odds. So in the universe of “all two-kid families”, you have a 50% chance of having “one of each”, and a 50% chance of having “two of the same”. Or, you have a 25% chance of having each of “boy-girl”, “girl-boy”, “girl-girl”, and “boy-boy”. But if you narrow your universe to include only “all two-kid families where one kid is a girl”, you eliminate one of the above possibilities, and so the odds of the three remaining possibilities all go up to 33%.
And if you further narrow your universe to include only “all two-kid families where the first kid is a girl”, you again eliminate one of the above possibilities, and the odds of the two remaining possibilities go up to 50%. And this is what you’re doing when you say, “They have a girl and are pregnant.” You’ve eliminated the “boy-girl” possibility.
Consider a totally different example: health statistics. We hear stuff all the time like, “The average person has X% odds of getting cancer.” In this case, without any other context, we can only assume that the universe includes everyone in the entire world. But we also know that your personal chances of getting cancer can vary greatly depending on things like health, family history, exposure to toxins, etc. So if you don’t smoke or drink, you eat well and exercise, you avoid too much sun exposure, you have no family history of cancer, etc. then your personal odds of getting cancer are much lower than the average, say 1/3 X%. That makes sense, right? But what are your odds of getting cancer, then? Are they X, or 1/3 X? Is X wrong? No, not if we’re including you as one person in the universe of “everybody”. But if we narrow the universe down to “you”, then your odds change.
Now let’s say you move to another part of the world, where for those who can’t afford it (which is most people) nutrition is poor and medical care is terrible. People in this community are therefore likely to die fairly young of causes other than cancer. You, however, can afford good food and good care, exactly like when you were living here. Great, right? Except that now - in the universe of your community - your odds of getting cancer go way, way up. You are much more likely than most people in your community to get cancer, because you’ll be living long enough to get it! Now, does the fact that you moved, or that these other people are dying have any bearing on your actual health? Obviously not. But describing a universe that includes only them and you does have bearing on your odds. *Relative *to their odds, yours increase.
So to come back to the OP, what is the universe described? “There is a family with two children. You have been told this family has a daughter. What are the odds they also have a son, assuming the biological odds of having a male or female child are equal? (Answer: 2/3.)”
“There is a family with two children. You have been told this family has a daughter.” = the universe of families with two children, one of which is a daughter.
This universe includes all families that had a boy and then a girl, all families that had a girl and then a boy, and all families that had a girl and then a girl. For the one-of-eaches, the order doesn’t matter; whether they had a girl and then a boy OR a boy and then a girl, we’re including them in the universe. But in doing so, we’re including twice as many one-of-eaches as girl-girls, and so having one of each is twice as likely - in this particular universe.