# Fartbumbling Pittisms **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 3, 2003, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201 "2003-04-03T14:43:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Ben\_Hicks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bbce88/32.png) [@Ben\_Hicks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ben_Hicks)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2003, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201/1 "2003-04-03T14:43:21Z")
I don’t mean to be a cockbushwallering party pooper and I do love a good bit of inventive cumpocketing invective but am I the only one getting tired of fartbastarding made up, non-existant incon-luvcustardbubbling-ceivable pittisms? Y’know, where posters desperate to be recognised as the creater of the next ‘Asshat’ come up with silly sounding (and frankly just plain embarrassing) insults whereby they stick a normal, common or garden cocksprocketing swearword like **‘Fuck, shit, cock etc…’** and then concatenate it with either a completely inoffensive household appliance **(Plunger, Sponge, Corkscrew)** or non existant words which sound like they come from an Australian Geography Bee **(Dimble, Wozza, Hoola etc…)** or just miscellaneous words like **bubble, pocket, bucket** or **nugget**. Like I said, I don’t mean to piss on everyone’s parade like a cuntbouncing dildovideo but these fictitious ball-sac-sponging swearwords really get on my nippleclippers. They sound contrived, invariably detract from _any_ rant and always leave me of a mental image of someone with a [Rogers Profanisaurus](http://www.viz.co.uk/profanisaurus/profanis.htm) in one hand and some obscure kitchen/torture implement in the other in a desperate search for an original concate-clitwiddling-nation. Kinda sad, really. I pledge a jizzflicking return to traditional knobknockering cursing free from all bizarre bumblefucking bibbleywobbleybollocking combinations of decent swearwords and meaningless gibberish or inoffensive household items. No longer shall our good, wholesome tittytwizzling American profanities be sullied by random, dumbshit extensions! No longer shall the keystones of English invective be subject to halfbaked mutations like cumbubble, fucknugget or assclown! LET US RISE, AND BRING OUR MOST SACRED SWEARWORDS BACK TO THEIR ROOTS!! WHO’S WITH ME??? ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2003, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201/2 "2003-04-03T14:51:25Z")
You kiss yer momma with that mouth, son? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2003, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201/3 "2003-04-03T14:53:59Z")
Aw, can’t we wait till I’ve had the chance to use ‘weener wrangler’ at least once? ---
**Author:** ![Ben\_Hicks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bbce88/32.png) [@Ben\_Hicks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ben_Hicks)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2003, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201/4 "2003-04-03T15:04:31Z")
No. I’m sorry, but sacrifices have to be made. ---
**Author:** ![Ben\_Hicks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bbce88/32.png) [@Ben\_Hicks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ben_Hicks)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2003, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201/5 "2003-04-03T15:05:34Z")
[sub]oh, go on then but ONLY once[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![beagledave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6de8d8/32.png) [@beagledave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beagledave)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2003, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201/6 "2003-04-03T15:14:43Z")
**Cum guzzling gutter sluts** is still fair game though…right? If it’s in my porn spam…it’s got a recognized usage. ---
**Author:** ![elf6c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c57346/32.png) [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2003, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201/7 "2003-04-03T15:14:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by El\_Kabong \* > \*\*Aw, can’t we wait till I’ve had the chance to use ‘weener wrangler’ at least once? \*\* Do sigs count? Maybe you could make it into a sig? “Ain’t no tougher man than a pissed off Texas weener wrangler” “Are you tough enough to become a weener wrangler? Take the test at (insert ironic website choice here)” “The saloon instanty fell into a terrified silence, as one-eye Pete, the feared weener wrangler out of the Dakota territory strode through the door.” ---
**Author:** ![Maxxxie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f14d63/32.png) [@Maxxxie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maxxxie)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2003, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201/8 "2003-04-03T15:15:07Z")
**Ben** , that would be taking all the fun out of reading the Pit threads!!! Max Oh, and you forgot “cunt-twibble”… ---
**Author:** ![Ben\_Hicks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bbce88/32.png) [@Ben\_Hicks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ben_Hicks)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2003, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201/9 "2003-04-03T15:18:24Z")
[ ---
**Author:** ![Ben\_Hicks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bbce88/32.png) [@Ben\_Hicks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ben_Hicks)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2003, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201/10 "2003-04-03T15:19:25Z")
Shit, genuinely don’t know how tha happened. I meant to say _a-hem_ > [@](#): > > If it’s in my porn spam…it’s got a recognized usage. Sounds like a pretty good rule of thumb to me 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Ben\_Hicks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bbce88/32.png) [@Ben\_Hicks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ben_Hicks)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2003, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201/11 "2003-04-03T15:21:15Z")
**Maxxxie** , I couldn’t even bear to _type_ cunt-twibble. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![skankweirdall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c6cbf5/32.png) [@skankweirdall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/skankweirdall)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2003, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201/12 "2003-04-03T15:30:05Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by El\_Kabong \* > \*\*Aw, can’t we wait till I’ve had the chance to use ‘weener wrangler’ at least once? \*\* Ah, come on, don’t tell me that is the first time you’ve heard that. ---
**Author:** ![Sapphire\_Wolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f14d63/32.png) [@Sapphire\_Wolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sapphire_Wolf)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2003, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201/13 "2003-04-03T16:04:44Z")
Hey! I just picked three good ones out of the OP - using all words that was supplied in the OP. Fuckplunger Cocksponge Shitbubble Can you continue to spew such language, **Ben**? I need more good ones. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2003, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201/14 "2003-04-03T16:38:33Z")
**weener wranglers** > [@](#): > > Ah, come on, don’t tell me that is the first time you’ve heard that. That was the first time I’ve ever heard that. You should understand that I was born far north of the Arctic Circle, to a desititute family of Finnish fish-scrapers. We had no radio or television, and our nightly entertainment primarily consisted of sitting around the parlor and fondly buttering each others’ hair. Times were hard and when I was five, I was sent to live with an abusive uncle on a small South Pacific Island, where I was forced daily to chase down and catch Guinea hens which we would sell for a few Guineas to visitors from neighboring New Guinea. I eventually made my escape and worked for several years as a dogsbody to the captain of a tramp freighter; why the captain didn’t simply get a dog I’ll never know, but I was grateful for the work, and the bowl of kibble I wolfed down once a day. Since my arrival in these Great United Snakes, I’ve mostly been working nights as a labor organizer in a local maternity ward, and thus have had little time for recreation, or to learn the mysterious ways of the natives. I did make it to the Houston rodeo this year and, while there were many Wranglers, which appear to be a certain type of pants, on view, there were no obvious weeners visible within them, and I was too shy to enquire further. All the above is just by way of explaining that I am not so worldly as many of the esteemed posters here, and I beg your forgiveness for never previously having come across this quaint expression. ---
**Author:** ![Banger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8491ac/32.png) [@Banger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Banger)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2003, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201/15 "2003-04-03T21:15:48Z")
This works for me. Of course, I’ve only used “asshat” in one post, and it was in response to a prior post specifically using that word. Heck, I don’t even know what “asshat” means, although I’m guessing it has some tenuous connection with having one’s head up one’s ass. I’m still not sure how this would make someone an “asshat”, as opposed to it making that person’s ass itself an “asshat”. And why didn’t “asshelmet” become popular instead? On a related note, outside of quoting others’ posts, I have used the word “fuck” (or any variation thereof) in only one post out of nearly 700 :eek: Oops, make that twice now 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Sister\_Vigilante](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9de0a6/32.png) [@Sister\_Vigilante](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sister_Vigilante)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2003, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201/16 "2003-04-03T21:55:30Z")
I’m just waiting for the Pit Curse Generator. Surely someone has the skills to create one… ---
**Author:** ![cuauhtemoc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecb155/32.png) [@cuauhtemoc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cuauhtemoc)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2003, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201/17 "2003-04-03T21:58:11Z")
“Fuckdimble” “Cockhoola” “Shitwozza” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Casey1505](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dc4da7/32.png) [@Casey1505](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Casey1505)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2003, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201/18 "2003-04-03T22:12:45Z")
> [@](#): > > If it’s in my porn spam…it’s got a recognized usage Words to live by, I’d say. ---
**Author:** ![Sqube](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aca169/32.png) [@Sqube](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sqube)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2003, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201/19 "2003-04-03T22:25:51Z")
Yeah, what about fuckleduck? I **love** fuckleduck! ---
**Author:** ![Dijon\_Warlock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9a28c/32.png) [@Dijon\_Warlock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dijon_Warlock)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2003, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201/20 "2003-04-04T04:23:24Z")
Anorchus. Eructator. Paskudnak. Fecaloid phaneromaniac. Orf. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fartbumbling-pittisms/166201.md?page=2)