# Farting Federal Employee gets Written Reprimand. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 22, 2012, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/farting-federal-employee-gets-written-reprimand/644808 "2012-12-22T04:09:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 4\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![aceplace57](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aceplace57/32/3500_2.png) [@aceplace57](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aceplace57)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2012, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/farting-federal-employee-gets-written-reprimand/644808/21 "2012-12-22T22:48:11Z")
It wasn’t every meeting. But often enough that I knew it was deliberate. It would have served him right to stain his boxers with a fluffy fart. 😛 > [@Seanette](#): > > How in the world did he cut loose on demand? > > I personally find it very painful to not vent gas. ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2012, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/farting-federal-employee-gets-written-reprimand/644808/22 "2012-12-22T23:24:56Z")
> [@aceplace57](#): > > Who was the anal retentive jerk that logged every fart? Maybe they could get some office work done instead of harassing this guy. Buy a scented candle for gosh sakes. > > [Five page reprimand for farting.](http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/coworkers-attacked-by-gas-645132) That stinks. 😛 I dunno, man. You ever been around someone who’s lactose intolerant and keeps snarfing the dairy anyway? I’d be afraid to have an open flame in the building. And I say this as someone with a fair degree of lactose intolerance. If I have a grilled cheese and an ice cream on the same day and forget to take Lactaid, _I_ can barely stand to be in the same room as me without a respirator. I wouldn’t have a problem with someone getting a formal reprimand for routinely dousing themselves with cologne even after being spoken to repeatedly about the issue and how it was affecting others. Or any other completely controllable action that affects others. And this is indeed controllable. The guy’s defense isn’t that he has IBS or some other medical issue where your body just does shit and you don’t really get a vote. His defense is that he’s lactose intolerant, which is the single most controllable GI issue you can possibly have. You don’t put lactose into your gob, or you accompany lactose with a dose of lactase, and eye watering stink doesn’t roll out of your ass. It’s that simple. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2012, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/farting-federal-employee-gets-written-reprimand/644808/23 "2012-12-23T03:53:59Z")
I just want to say that I think the Farting Federal Employees would make a great band name. ---
**Author:** ![Cicero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cicero/32/3594_2.png) [@Cicero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cicero)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2012, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/farting-federal-employee-gets-written-reprimand/644808/24 "2012-12-23T15:42:19Z")
We used to have a fart tin at work. If you let one rip it would cost you 25 cents. If you let one rip in front of a female it was double. Some people paid in advance. At the end of the year it was donated to charity. There was a hell of a lot of money there. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/farting-federal-employee-gets-written-reprimand/644808.md?page=1)