# Fat Albert: The Movie **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 14, 2004, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122 "2004-10-14T00:13:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Angel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d26b3c/32.png) [@Johnny\_Angel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Angel)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122/1 "2004-10-14T00:13:53Z")
How does one even say it? It’s not like the promo for White Chicks, which is kind of like being pushed off of a building – you immediately know how bad it’s going to get. It’s more like being in an elevator which seems to be descending faster than you expected, but it accellerates slowly enough that you have time to wonder how bad it really is and how bad it’s going to get. I mean, look at this trajectory: [Link to Fat Albert trailer.](http://www.apple.com/trailers/fox/fat_albert/) **Oh, boy.** It’s live action. **Fuck me.** It’s the cartoon Fat Albert sucked into the real world. **Jesus fucking Christ.** He raps. **Aaaaaagh! Get it off of me!** He goes to meet Bill Cosby in person. **Where were you, God? Where were you?!?** ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122/2 "2004-10-14T00:15:28Z")
> [@Johnny Angel](#): > > **Where were you, God? Where were you?!?** I saw that. There is no God. ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122/3 "2004-10-14T00:20:10Z")
::sigh:: You know what I coulda done with the money they spent on making this movie? I coulda done a lot with the money they spent on making a movie. I coulda made ten good movies. Hell, I could have spent the money on seventeen thousand gallons of spit and it would’ve been a better investment than this movie. If God existed, surely he’d smite all of humanity because of this movie, right? ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122/4 "2004-10-14T00:24:09Z")
> [@Johnny Angel](#): > > He goes to meet Bill Cosby in person. **Where were you, God? Where were you?!?** Does Bill Cosby give him an angry lecture about race relations? ---
**Author:** ![Askia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/96bed5/32.png) [@Askia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askia)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122/5 "2004-10-14T02:00:13Z")
…damn gerbils ate my post. Grrrr. I made a few pithy comments how I liked the trailer, lightweight as it is, and about postmodern humor and the pervasiveness of pop culture meeting reality and a 21st century sensibility. I liked the in-jokes the Fat Albert makes about his own surreality (In a clothing store: “Let’s take off that sweater and see what!” “I can’t… I don’t don’t know what’s under here.”) Dumb Donald’s comment about him having no face under his hat was equally amusing… I just hope all the jokes aren’t like that. Fat Albert meeting his Maker is not (necessarily) the disaster the OP would have you believe. As someone who first heard Bill Cosby’s Fat Albert stories from comedy albums thirty years ago, this is just Cos and the original Cosby Kid coming full circle. Isn’t it nice to see a kid’s film trailer blissfully free of scatological humor? ---
**Author:** ![rjung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/45deac/32.png) [@rjung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjung)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122/6 "2004-10-14T05:30:37Z")
I thought the trailer was okay. While Fat Albert rapping was a definite turn-off, the rest of the trailer gave me the impression of a **Brady Bunch** -style self-parody, where Fat Albert _et al_ aren’t going to change just because the rest of the world has. The existential humor (“I don’t have a face!”) was good for a chuckle, and Albert-meets-Cos _can_ be fun if it’s done right. Despite whatever socio-political rants he may be delivering of late, I still have enough confidence in Mr. Cosby’s comic skills to think he might be able to pull this off. At a minimum, it looks better than the two **Scooby Doo** movies. ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 9:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122/7 "2004-10-14T09:48:36Z")
Is there a non-Quicktime version of the trailer? I uninstalled QT lastweek and refuse to further subject myself to its crapiness and invasiveness. ---
**Author:** ![Trunk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/87869e/32.png) [@Trunk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trunk)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 11:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122/8 "2004-10-14T11:53:21Z")
What’s wrong with Fat Albert rapping? They played in a funk band. If he was around today, it would probably be a hip-hop band. Who do you think Biggie Smalls based his persona on? 😃 It’s not like having Scooby Doo rap. (he didn’t did he? I never saw it.) ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122/9 "2004-10-14T16:06:08Z")
> [@Trunk](#): > > It’s not like having Scooby Doo rap. (he didn’t did he? I never saw it.) I believe his annoying nephew did at the end of [Scooby-Doo and the Ghoul School](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0189071/combined). ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122/10 "2004-10-14T16:09:26Z")
I agree with **rjung**. This may not be as bad as I feared when I first heard of the concept. But I’d still rather just see a movie of Fat Albert based on the old Cosby routines. They’ve just gotta work the Frankenstein bit in somehow. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122/11 "2004-10-14T16:17:17Z")
> [@Cisco](#): > > Is there a non-Quicktime version of the trailer? I uninstalled QT lastweek and refuse to further subject myself to its crapiness and invasiveness. [Moviefone](http://movies.channel.aol.com/franchise/exclusives/fatalbert.adp) has an AOL Player option but knowing AOL, it’s probably worse than having QT on your system. ---
**Author:** ![JoeSki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b487fb/32.png) [@JoeSki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JoeSki)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122/12 "2004-10-14T17:17:43Z")
Try watching the trailer at [Rotten tomatoes](http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/fat_albert/trailers.php). ---
**Author:** ![B.Serum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/b.serum/32/14266_2.png) [@B.Serum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/B.Serum)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122/13 "2004-10-14T18:22:31Z")
That movie is like school in the summer! ---
**Author:** ![Redsland](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9de0a6/32.png) [@Redsland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Redsland)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122/14 "2004-10-14T18:31:25Z")
School in the summer? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122/15 "2004-10-14T18:34:45Z")
> [@rjung](#): > > I thought the trailer was okay. While Fat Albert rapping was a definite turn-off, the rest of the trailer gave me the impression of a **Brady Bunch** -style self-parody, where Fat Albert _et al_ aren’t going to change just because the rest of the world has. The existential humor (“I don’t have a face!”) was good for a chuckle, and Albert-meets-Cos _can_ be fun if it’s done right. Okay, I just saw the RealPlayer version in **JoeSki** ’s link and snickered through pretty much the entire thing. Unless all the good parts are in the trailer, this movie won’t be all that bad. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Angel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d26b3c/32.png) [@Johnny\_Angel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Angel)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122/16 "2004-10-14T21:01:28Z")
**Redsland** wrote: > [@](#): > > School in the summer? Nooo claaaas. ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122/17 "2004-10-14T21:11:57Z")
> [@Redsland](#): > > School in the summer? Yea bitch, school in summertime! Shit, open your %^&\* ears hoe! ^& ^&_(_& (\*&!!! ---
**Author:** ![Chastain86](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Chastain86](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chastain86)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122/18 "2004-10-14T21:21:05Z")
> [@SPOOFE](#): > > ::sigh:: > > You know what I coulda done with the money they spent on making this movie? I coulda done a lot with the money they spent on making a movie. I coulda made ten good movies. > > Hell, I could have spent the money on seventeen thousand gallons of spit and it would’ve been a better investment than this movie. > > If God existed, surely he’d smite all of humanity because of this movie, right? I just read this post in [Strong Bad’s](http://www.homestarrunner.com) voice, and it made me giggle. ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2004, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122/19 "2004-10-15T00:28:11Z")
Ironically, when I took the “What Homestar Character Are you?” quiz, it said I was Strong Bad. And I type with boxing gloves on, too. But that’s where the similarities end. My head is not - repeat, NOT - bigger than my torso. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2004, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122/20 "2004-10-15T05:18:12Z")
I sat through a rough cut of this movie. Due to my amazing powers, I naturally escaped unharmed. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-albert-the-movie/269122.md?page=2)