# Fat women and yoga pants/spandex **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 16, 2015, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825 "2015-02-16T16:57:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2015, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825/81 "2015-02-17T23:35:04Z")
> [@Wesley\_Clark](#): > > Are there any women who agree with me that women’s self criticism is harsher and more constant than the criticism they get from men? I think people are always gonna be their own harshest critic. ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2015, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825/82 "2015-02-17T23:49:39Z")
> [@monstro](#): > > I think people are always gonna be their own harshest critic. Thank you, thats the point I was trying to make. Superego attacks are something everyone has to deal with, and they are harsher than what other people direct at you. ---
**Author:** ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2015, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825/83 "2015-02-18T00:17:06Z")
> [@Wesley\_Clark](#): > > I don’t think I have a lot of concern about that. I’m not trying to get laid by playing the white knight, or acting like it is ok to be an asshole unless it is unpopular. I am expressing my opinion that women berate themselves about their bodies more than men berate them about their bodies. Others disagree. Why, exactly, have you chosen to express this opinion here, in a thread started by a man for the sole purpose of berating women about their bodies? > [@](#): > > Are there any women who agree with me that women’s self criticism is harsher and more constant than the criticism they get from men? Well, this thread wasn’t started by a woman criticizing herself for looking fat in yoga pants. It was started by a man who thought that the world needed to know that he thinks fat women look bad in yoga pants. ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanub/32/132_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2015, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825/84 "2015-02-18T00:19:03Z")
> [@Rushgeekgirl](#): > > hawhawhaw fat people are funny! Especially fat women in tight pants! hawhawhaw > > Oh and how DARE they offend our eyes with those pants! Uggh. No wonder so many young women are starving themselves. They’re terrified of being seen as whales. I fucking hate people sometimes. I agree with this sentiment to a point. On the one hand, I do feel like a person, _any person_, should feel free to dress as they please without being judged like a Four-H project. On the other hand, unfair as it is, our society as a whole does share the major character flaw of superficiality so questions like the OP are inevitable. As an adolescent of the ‘80s, I can remember one \*never \*wanting to show their bellies, thighs, butts. We had leggings, but you always wore a long shirt, jacket, whatever. It’s been several years since I’ve noticed that this trend has seemingly been retired.I’m torn between marveling at womens’ “fuck off, I’ll wear what I want” attitude and being perplexed at the way some people dress in public. Are women just more confident or do they not have a clue at how unattractive they (some of them) look? ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2015, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825/85 "2015-02-18T00:34:46Z")
> [@WOOKINPANUB](#): > > Are women just more confident or do they not have a clue at how unattractive they (some of them) look? I was serious when I said upthread that these women that everyone are always talking shit about usually have a man. (Or at least had one, as evidenced by children). So it’s not true they aren’t attractive. They aren’t attractive to _you_, but no offense, they ain’t concerned about you. They are more concerned about impressing the guys (or gals) who like seeing all that jigglin’ ass. And there’s a lot of those people. The internet is rife with lonely, bitter men who lack for any positive female attention, and yet they seem real confident about the ability of “fat chicks in yoga pants” to grab a mate. Strangely, we hardly ever read similar sad-sack stories from sexually frustrated fat chicks in yoga pants. What this says to me is that 1) men in general aren’t nearly as picky about who they find attractive as certain know-it-all men seem to think, and 2)neither fatness or a penchant for tight clothing is a barrier to finding a man. I’ve never seen a fat lady in yoga pants who looks like she’s lonely or especially socially isolated. I’ve seen plenty of skinny guys who do. Maybe the latter needs to start eating some sandwiches and wearing some yoga pants. Just sayin’. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Stuffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f17d59/32.png) [@Stuffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stuffy)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2015, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825/86 "2015-02-18T00:39:49Z")
> [@monstro](#): > > I’ve never seen a fat lady in yoga pants who looks like she’s lonely or especially socially isolated. I’ve seen plenty of skinny guys who do. Maybe the latter needs to start eating some sandwiches and wearing some yoga pants. Just sayin’. 🙂 I’m remembering the bicycle shorts fad and all I have to say to this is, please, please, just don’t. Well maybe the sandwich. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2015, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825/87 "2015-02-18T00:42:18Z")
> [@Rushgeekgirl](#): > > No wonder so many young women are starving themselves. They’re terrified of being seen as whales. I fucking hate people sometimes. Actually, most whales are [fairly slender.](http://whalewatchcabo.com/wp-content/uploads/Whale-Species-Chart-copy.jpg) I certainly wouldn’t complain if they were wearing yoga pants. ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanub/32/132_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2015, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825/88 "2015-02-18T01:24:57Z")
> [@monstro](#): > > I was serious when I said upthread that these women that everyone are always talking shit about usually have a man. (Or at least had one, as evidenced by children). > > So it’s not true they aren’t attractive. They aren’t attractive to _you_, but no offense, they ain’t concerned about you. They are more concerned about impressing the guys (or gals) who like seeing all that jigglin’ ass. And there’s a lot of those people. > > The internet is rife with lonely, bitter men who lack for any positive female attention, and yet they seem real confident about the ability of “fat chicks in yoga pants” to grab a mate. Strangely, we hardly ever read similar sad-sack stories from sexually frustrated fat chicks in yoga pants. What this says to me is that 1) men in general aren’t nearly as picky about who they find attractive as certain know-it-all men seem to think, and 2)neither fatness or a penchant for tight clothing is a barrier to finding a man. > > I’ve never seen a fat lady in yoga pants who looks like she’s lonely or especially socially isolated. I’ve seen plenty of skinny guys who do. Maybe the latter needs to start eating some sandwiches and wearing some yoga pants. Just sayin’. 🙂 Eep; I have done an extremely shite job of expressing myself here. By “unattractive” I mean in the conventional / media sense (if \*that \*makes sense). My judgement may be colored by where I spent those adolescent '80s years (SoCal)but my point is that I feel that there has been a definite shift in the mind set of women, as far as trying to hide their bodies / try to fit into the dreaded “mold”. I guess, in the context of the OP (if we’re assuming it’s an actual question as opposed to a veiled insult to larger women) I find myself wondering if the beauty standard has shifted (which would be great) or perhaps I just live in a place where the beauty standard is _different_ from where I spent the first half of my life. For the record, I’m a smallish, fairly in shape middle aged lady and to this day I still cover my butt, belly and thighs when I’m not at the beach or the gym. I realize this may be my personal baggage, but one only knows what one only knows:) ---
**Author:** ![jz78817](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jz78817/32/1028_2.png) [@jz78817](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jz78817)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2015, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825/89 "2015-02-18T01:25:20Z")
> [@WOOKINPANUB](#): > > Are women just more confident or do they not have a clue at how unattractive they (some of them) look? I highly doubt any of them give a shit what you find attractive. A wise man (whose name I forget) once said: “Nobody is thinking about you as much as you think they are.” ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanub/32/132_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2015, 1:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825/90 "2015-02-18T01:46:12Z")
> [@jz78817](#): > > I highly doubt any of them give a shit what you find attractive. > > A wise man (whose name I forget) once said: “Nobody is thinking about you as much as you think they are.” I \*get \*that they don’t give a shit what I (and by" I " I’m refering to the general “I”) think. My thoughts are more related to \*if \*not, \*why \*not? And I don’t mean that in a judgemental way, like, “how dare they offend our sensibilites?” I’m wondering if they are lucky enough to have the confidence / positive self-image to wear what they like, or if they are oblivious that they present themselves in a way that much of society does not find attractive. I’m not saying that _I_ automatically find a larger figure unattractive by any means. A sloppy person (of any size) with ill fitting clothes? Yep. But that’s not what I’m talking about. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2015, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825/91 "2015-02-18T02:01:25Z")
> [@WOOKINPANUB](#): > > I find myself wondering if the beauty standard has shifted (which would be great) or perhaps I just live in a place where the beauty standard is _different_ from where I spent the first half of my life.) The most parsimonious explanation is that the beauty standard has changed like it always does with each generation. I don’t think we live in a society where “everything goes”. I think women are still largely conforming to what’s fashionable. Like, I don’t see a whole lot of girls wearing baggy jeans, because baggy jeans aren’t considered fashionable for females. But skinny jeans, like yoga pants and leggings, are. I don’t know how fat girls feel about their bodies. But I imagine that you can still pretty lousy about the way you look and still desire to wear fashionable “cool” clothes. I look at pictures of people from the 70s and can’t believe at how tight everyone’s bell bottoms were. Especially the nut-huggers the men would wear. So it seems to me we’re just circling back, except with plumper bodies. ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanub/32/132_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2015, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825/92 "2015-02-18T02:53:27Z")
> [@monstro](#): > > The most parsimonious explanation is that the beauty standard has changed like it always does with each generation. > > I don’t think we live in a society where “everything goes”. I think women are still largely conforming to what’s fashionable. Like, I don’t see a whole lot of girls wearing baggy jeans, because baggy jeans aren’t considered fashionable for females. But skinny jeans, like yoga pants and leggings, are. > > I don’t know how fat girls feel about their bodies. But I imagine that you can still pretty lousy about the way you look and still desire to wear fashionable “cool” clothes. > > I look at pictures of people from the 70s and can’t believe at how tight everyone’s bell bottoms were. Especially the nut-huggers the men would wear. So it seems to me we’re just circling back, except with plumper bodies. Not to belabor the point (she said as she went on to belabor the point), but I guess your last sentence kind of approaches part of my question: are plumper bodies becoming more acceptable / the norm? I surely do hope so, 'cause I know it would personally take a helluva lot of pressure off of me 😉 ---
**Author:** ![even\_sven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dfb087/32.png) [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2015, 3:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825/93 "2015-02-18T03:10:16Z")
> [@WOOKINPANUB](#): > > Not to belabor the point (she said as she went on to belabor the point), but I guess your last sentence kind of approaches part of my question: are plumper bodies becoming more acceptable / the norm? I surely do hope so, 'cause I know it would personally take a helluva lot of pressure off of me 😉 I don’t think it’s so much that plumper bodies are the norm, as much as the ways that leggings are revealing are no longer considered revealing, and our minds just kind of gloss over it. Think about a swimsuit. On the beach, you aren’t looking at all the women wearing swimsuits and wondering how they make sense of wearing something so revealing. You just see a bunch of people in swimsuits, and it pings in your head as perfectly normal. But of course, if someone wore a swimsuit to a dinner party, you’d think it was too revealing and would question what they were thinking. Leggings used to be a swimsuit at a dinner party, but now they are a swimsuit on a beach. People just don’t process them mentally as “revealing.” ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanub/32/132_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2015, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825/94 "2015-02-18T03:31:16Z")
> [@even\_sven](#): > > I don’t think it’s so much that plumper bodies are the norm, as much as the ways that leggings are revealing are no longer considered revealing, and our minds just kind of gloss over it. > > Think about a swimsuit. On the beach, you aren’t looking at all the women wearing swimsuits and wondering how they make sense of wearing something so revealing. You just see a bunch of people in swimsuits, and it pings in your head as perfectly normal. But of course, if someone wore a swimsuit to a dinner party, you’d think it was too revealing and would question what they were thinking. > > Leggings used to be a swimsuit at a dinner party, but now they are a swimsuit on a beach. People just don’t process them mentally as “revealing.” Wow, what a great, interesting take on it. I think what’s hanging me up is less so the “revealing” aspect, as the "let’s not look _fat_ at any costs angle. Which brings me back to the "has the idea of what looks _fat_ standard changed or are people, as a whole, changing their standards? ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2015, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825/95 "2015-02-18T03:36:10Z")
> [@WOOKINPANUB](#): > > Not to belabor the point (she said as she went on to belabor the point), but I guess your last sentence kind of approaches part of my question: are plumper bodies becoming more acceptable / the norm? I surely do hope so, 'cause I know it would personally take a helluva lot of pressure off of me 😉 Well, there certainly are a lot more plumper bodies walking around than there used to be. It would make sense that with this would come more acceptance of curvy silhouettes. But I don’t know. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2015, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825/96 "2015-02-18T03:54:24Z")
> [@Wesley\_Clark](#): > > Thank you, thats the point I was trying to make. Superego attacks are something everyone has to deal with, and they are harsher than what other people direct at you. But they build on what you’ve been told. Every time when I got my grades, my father would say “we need to talk”. This would generally be on a weekday. Then on Saturday, we had The Talk. My mother sitting in her armchair, her lamp the only light in the room, spotlighting her knitting. My father in his armchair, dissecting all my failings as a student and rejecting beforehand any defenses I could come up with. And me in a creaky chair that for some reason never stayed glued, knowing that not only would any movement in my part result in a loud noise but it might lead the chair to come apart (again). How do you think I felt about my grades? Never mind that my grades were good enough to get into any school and program I would have chosen, that’s irrelevant! Never mind “I got the highest grade in the class”, that’s irrelevant! Never mind “I improved clearly from last period”, that’s irrelevant! Any time I’m around men who think of me as “one of the guys” or who don’t realize I’m a woman (hello internet) I hear women rated like show ponies. Those two natural-streaky-blonde twins? What bad dye jobs! That brunette? Cute but she’s got such short legs. Etc, etc, etc. Since I know any guy who looks at me is going to find even more defects than I do, I’m not going to bother change into “officewear” just to go get a box of milk. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2015, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825/97 "2015-02-18T04:12:41Z")
> [@WOOKINPANUB](#): > > For the record, I’m a smallish, fairly in shape middle aged lady Holy smokes, all this time I thought you were a big guy. Probably because my big guy brother’s nickname is Wookie. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanub/32/132_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2015, 1:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825/98 "2015-02-18T13:04:49Z")
> [@gigi](#): > > Holy smokes, all this time I thought you were a big guy. Probably because my big guy brother’s nickname is Wookie. :smack: I wondered how many people were reading my posts and thinking I’m a dude. My name comes from an Eddie Murphy skit in SNL, not Chewbacca in a bar 😛 ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2015, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825/99 "2015-02-18T13:11:31Z")
> [@WOOKINPANUB](#): > > I wondered how many people were reading my posts and thinking I’m a dude. > > My name comes from an Eddie Murphy skit in SNL, not Chewbacca in a bar 😛 **Buckwheat** would have sown more confusion. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2015, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825/100 "2015-02-18T13:29:04Z")
> [@WOOKINPANUB](#): > > I wondered how many people were reading my posts and thinking I’m a dude. > > My name comes from an Eddie Murphy skit in SNL, not Chewbacca in a bar 😛 Mind blown! I always just made the Wookie connection, too, and did assume you were a man. Of the burly persuasion. The Eddie Murphy thing makes more sense now that you mention it! 🙂 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fat-women-and-yoga-pants-spandex/712825.md?page=6)