# Father of the Bride Wins One! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 9, 2007, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595 "2007-09-09T19:11:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![LiveOnAPlane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3d9bf3/32.png) [@LiveOnAPlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LiveOnAPlane)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2007, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595/1 "2007-09-09T19:11:21Z")
Just thought you all would get a chuckle out of this, nothing more. After the wedding of our daugther, we were doing pictures afterwards and at one point The Daughter, WhatsHisName(just kidding) and me were posed for pics. I’m on the left, the new husband is in the middle, and the bride is on the right. She leans over and around New Husband and sez to me: “Hey, Dad. X and I are going to have SEX tonight!” Nice try, kid. I leans over and around New Husband, and sez to her: “And I sincerely hope you all enjoy it as much as your mother and I have all through the years!!” …It ain’t about how the hapless NH sincerely wished he wuz somewhere else about then (God, they’re so CUTE when they’re young and naive)… It wuz about how my daughter’s jaw just freaking’ dropped… Score one for the Old Fart and thanx fer listening. ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2007, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595/2 "2007-09-09T19:17:08Z")
[QUOTE=LiveOnAPlane] Just thought you all would get a chuckle out of this, nothing more. After the wedding of our daugther, we were doing pictures afterwards and at one point The Daughter, WhatsHisName(just kidding) and me were posed for pics. I’m on the left, the new husband is in the middle, and the bride is on the right. She leans over and around New Husband and sez to me: “Hey, Dad. X and I are going to have SEX tonight!” Nice try, kid. I leans over and around New Husband, and sez to her: “And I sincerely hope you all enjoy it as much as your mother and I have all through the years!!” …It ain’t about how the hapless NH sincerely wished he wuz somewhere else about then (God, they’re so CUTE when they’re young and naive)… It wuz about how my daughter’s jaw just freaking’ dropped… Score one for the Old Fart and thanx fer listening. [/QUOTE] You and your wife had sex with your daughter all those years? :eek: 😉 ---
**Author:** ![NinetyWt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/cc9497/32.png) [@NinetyWt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinetyWt)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2007, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595/3 "2007-09-09T19:18:16Z")
Heh. Good one. 🙂 My son came knocking on the door one morning and teasingly said “Are you kids NEKKKKKID?”… When my Hubby replied with “Actually, yes…”… son laughed and said “Well I’m glad SOMEBODY’s gettin’ some !” 😛 ---
**Author:** ![LiveOnAPlane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3d9bf3/32.png) [@LiveOnAPlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LiveOnAPlane)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2007, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595/4 "2007-09-09T19:22:19Z")
[QUOTE=Malthus] You and your wife had sex with your daughter all those years? :eek: 😉 [/QUOTE] Well, that would keep it in the family, huh? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![LiveOnAPlane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3d9bf3/32.png) [@LiveOnAPlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LiveOnAPlane)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2007, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595/5 "2007-09-09T19:24:44Z")
[QUOTE=NinetyWt] Heh. Good one. 🙂 My son came knocking on the door one morning and teasingly said “Are you kids NEKKKKKID?”… When my Hubby replied with “Actually, yes…”… son laughed and said “Well I’m glad SOMEBODY’s gettin’ some !” 😛 [/QUOTE] Equally good 'un! I’m sure that through the years, New Husband will learn how to do that also! (Um, if not, he’s in for a real baaaaaaad time. :o ) ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2007, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595/6 "2007-09-09T23:57:23Z")
[QUOTE=LiveOnAPlane] Well, that would keep it in the family, huh? 😛 [/QUOTE] The family that lays together stays together. Ow! stop hitting me. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2007, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595/7 "2007-09-10T13:26:27Z")
Did your daughter just get married? Congrats dude! May her first child be a masculine child. ---
**Author:** ![Sophistry\_and\_Illusion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@Sophistry\_and\_Illusion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sophistry_and_Illusion)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2007, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595/8 "2007-09-10T13:56:08Z")
[QUOTE=Rick] The family that lays together stays together. Ow! stop hitting me. [/QUOTE] I’m hitting you because you stole my line, bastard! ---
**Author:** ![hotflungwok](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/edb3f5/32.png) [@hotflungwok](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hotflungwok)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2007, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595/9 "2007-09-10T14:28:22Z")
At my brother’s wedding we were packing things up and getting ready to leave, and my brother and the father in law were joking around. At one point my brother jumps up on a table and bellows ‘I’m having sex with your daughter tonight!’. I pointed at him and said ‘Hey I don’t know who you think you are, but you have to wait in line just like the rest of us.’ ---
**Author:** ![TroubleAgain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e480ec/32.png) [@TroubleAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroubleAgain)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2007, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595/10 "2007-09-10T17:02:38Z")
[QUOTE=Zebra] Did your daughter just get married? Congrats dude! May her first child be a masculine child. [/QUOTE] But only if it’s a boy. ::d&r:: ---
**Author:** ![Sunrazor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sunrazor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunrazor)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2007, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595/11 "2007-09-10T17:39:45Z")
I love this! Why is it today’s youngsters have such a high squick reaction to the idea of us old fuckers … um … fucking? From the time I was eight, I knew damn well why I wasn’t supposed to EVER go into my parents’ bedroom without knocking. My sons can make with the locker room talk all they want, but let me make a salacious comment and :eek: ! Here’s to sex after 50! ---
**Author:** ![Swampwolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8edcca/32.png) [@Swampwolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Swampwolf)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2007, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595/12 "2007-09-10T18:04:55Z")
I once used the zinger inthe third panel of [this](http://somethingpositive.net/sp11142003.shtml) strip to my pelvic affiliate’s parents…Fortunately, they’re sick f\*\*\*ers, and apreciated it. Of course, this is the family where the grandfather used to tell the kids, “Welp, I’m-a goin’ upstairs to f\*\*\* your gramma now. See you kids later!” ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2007, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595/13 "2007-09-10T18:09:10Z")
[QUOTE=LiveOnAPlane] “And I sincerely hope you all enjoy it as much as your mother and I have all through the years!!” [/QUOTE] You are a sick, twisted person. Fabulous, but sick. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Rocketeer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rocketeer/32/4437_2.png) [@Rocketeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rocketeer)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2007, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595/14 "2007-09-10T18:53:30Z")
We were at the dinner table, and somehow the subject came up. I looked at Littlest R and said, “Well, you know your mother and I have had sex.” (ewwwww, Dad, ugh, eeeew) I looked at Oldest R and said, “…twice!” 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2007, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595/15 "2007-09-10T19:04:30Z")
Umpteen years ago at a girlfriend’s house, she, I, and her little brother were folding laundry. Little bro picks up an old, worn-out, towel with many holes and says he’s just going to throw it away. I respond, “Don’t do that, it’s probably your parents favorite after-sex towel.” The look on his face was priceless. Him holding it by the corner as if it had just come out of the bedroom instead of the drier was more so. ---
**Author:** ![susan\_foster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d9b06d/32.png) [@susan\_foster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan_foster)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2007, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595/16 "2007-09-10T20:56:28Z")
I know my parents have had sex 4 times. Once for each of us kids, and once for the time I walked in on them when I was little. Man, what were the odds that I would catch them that one time! Susan ---
**Author:** ![stolichnaya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bcef8e/32.png) [@stolichnaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stolichnaya)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2007, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595/17 "2007-09-10T21:02:27Z")
Listen, I have come to terms with the fact that my parents have sex. My Dad is male, and my Mom is female. ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2007, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595/18 "2007-09-10T22:38:24Z")
I was actually in the seventh grade before I learned “how babies were made”. We had a sex-ed class in gym class and the book gave a very physiological description of intercourse. Once the words percolated through my brain, and I finally visualized what was being described, my first thought was “Then mom and dad, they…Ewwwww!” ---
**Author:** ![mnemosyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2007, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595/19 "2007-09-10T22:57:44Z")
For Christmas, my sister gave my parents a get-away in a hotel, and for various reasons they had to keep delaying the date, until finally, a few months later, they were able to go. My father calls me about something unrelated, and since I wasn’t home, he leaves a message on the machine. He decides to mention that him and mom are going to the hotel that weekend and > [@](#): > > who knows what’s gonna happen there! Ok! Talk to you Monday! Bye! Um…::eek::! Actually, I was laughing too hard to really be shocked, I mean, how many people’s fathers call to say they’re gonna get some!!! My parents have been together over 34 years, and my mom has commented to the effect that they have a pretty active sex life, so it isn’t as if this is a rare event for him. It was just…_bizarre_! ---
**Author:** ![LiveOnAPlane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3d9bf3/32.png) [@LiveOnAPlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LiveOnAPlane)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2007, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595/20 "2007-09-11T04:37:45Z")
Thanks for the funny anecdotes! Nice to know I’m not the only diseased one here. And it’s just a wonderful gift that for whatever reason, mentioning his or her parents having sex to an offspring trumps EVERYTHING. Puts a real brain worm in their heads… [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/father-of-the-bride-wins-one/418595.md?page=2)