# "Father's outrage over pornographic candy wrappers" - and it's not The Onion **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 27, 2009, 12:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896 "2009-08-27T12:07:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Scougs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scougs/32/3158_2.png) [@Scougs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scougs)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2009, 12:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896/1 "2009-08-27T12:07:31Z")
[Story from the UK Daily Mail here.](http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1209383/Not-sweet-Fathers-outrage-pornographic-candy-wrappers.html) Not much to add really, but I laughed out loud. I love the bit where the wife has to go and sit in the car park. One further observation - love the way the headline is in English English, and the page title is in American English. ---
**Author:** ![Philster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/13edae/32.png) [@Philster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Philster)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2009, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896/2 "2009-08-27T13:27:04Z")
The link says, “Father’s fury over children’s pornographic sweet wrappers” That’s English English to me. ---
**Author:** ![Philster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/13edae/32.png) [@Philster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Philster)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2009, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896/3 "2009-08-27T13:31:38Z")
Oops, I see what you are talking about. The page title (viewable in my page tab), is American English. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2009, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896/4 "2009-08-27T14:06:10Z")
Well, you know… It really does look like they’re having sex. ---
**Author:** ![dangermom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e274bd/32.png) [@dangermom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dangermom)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2009, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896/5 "2009-08-27T14:10:56Z")
Yep, they’re definitely getting pretty funky on those wrappers. I wouldn’t like them either. (Bummer; I like Maoam.) I wouldn’t cause a scene at the store, but I wouldn’t buy them. ---
**Author:** ![Colophon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f05b48/32.png) [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2009, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896/6 "2009-08-27T14:22:12Z")
> [@](#): > > Yep, they’re definitely getting pretty funky on those wrappers. I wouldn’t like them either. (Bummer; I like Maoam.) I wouldn’t cause a scene at the store, but I wouldn’t buy them. You would make a purchasing choice based on a cartoon on a sweet wrapper? Has the world gone totally insane, or is it just you? ---
**Author:** ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2009, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896/7 "2009-08-27T14:28:32Z")
It wouldn’t have any bearing on whether I’d purchase them, but yes, the lime is ravishing the lemon. And those cherries are being treated like the tramps they are. That is one lucky fruit. ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2009, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896/8 "2009-08-27T14:36:24Z")
That’s a lime? The artist needs to go back to anthropomorphic fruit drawing school. ---
**Author:** ![Hampshire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hampshire/32/4887_2.png) [@Hampshire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hampshire)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2009, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896/9 "2009-08-27T14:38:35Z")
No outrage here but what the hell is going on with those wrappers? What does the candy company explain it away as? Is he really supposed to be humping the fruit? ---
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2009, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896/10 "2009-08-27T14:39:11Z")
I’ve seen this candy on pages before this for the exact reason stated. I have to ask why his child would associate it with sex. Did daddy and mommy do something like that in front of the minors? The candy company is not portraying humping fruit as far as they are concerned. I think the first time this was brought to my attention it was a page about how some people tend to see sex objects in daily items. ---
**Author:** ![Colophon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f05b48/32.png) [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2009, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896/11 "2009-08-27T14:44:32Z")
And to make it worse, the sweets are called **MAOAM** , which as any fule kno is the exact noise a citrus fruit makes at the moment of climax. ---
**Author:** ![Giles](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giles/32/60_2.png) [@Giles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giles)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2009, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896/12 "2009-08-27T14:45:32Z")
> [@Harmonious\_Discord](#): > > I’ve seen this candy on pages before this for the exact reason stated. I have to ask why his child would associate it with sex. Did daddy and mommy do something like that in front of the minors? > > The candy company is not portraying humping fruit as far as they are concerned. My children are all grown up, but if a five-year-old asked me what the fruit were doing I’d just say they were kissing or cuddling. The fruit don’t seem to have any genitalia, let along be doing anything with them, so I only think somebody with a really dirty mind would think they are “having sex”. But, as I think D.H. Lawrence once observed, it’s the people with dirty minds who want the censorship. ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2009, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896/13 "2009-08-27T14:46:33Z")
It’s cartoon drawings of fruit with facial expressions. If you see humans having sex in that, you’re obsessed. P.S. The ideal Daily Mail :rolleyes: headline would be: Diana death due to immigration (fashion pictures on page 9) ---
**Author:** ![Colophon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f05b48/32.png) [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2009, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896/14 "2009-08-27T14:49:43Z")
> [@glee](#): > > P.S. The ideal Daily Mail :rolleyes: headline would be: > > Diana death due to immigration (fashion pictures on page 9) I think you mean: Diana death due to immigrant NHS workers: what will it mean for YOUR house price? ---
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2009, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896/15 "2009-08-27T14:52:38Z")
I would be interesting to know what the average time after release of a product that it takes to receive a graphics complaint. ---
**Author:** ![Yorikke](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yorikke/32/4335_2.png) [@Yorikke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yorikke)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2009, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896/16 "2009-08-27T14:59:38Z")
I laughed, and it’s funny, but seriously, fruit fucking on my kids’ candy wrappers would kinda piss me off too. Joe ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Zappa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Mama\_Zappa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Zappa)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2009, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896/17 "2009-08-27T15:00:22Z")
> [@bup](#): > > That’s a lime? The artist needs to go back to anthropomorphic fruit drawing school. Yeah, really. I personally see a lima or other bean, not exactly what I crave when I get a hankering for fruit-flavored sweets. That man has a very dirty mind. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2009, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896/18 "2009-08-27T15:06:39Z")
The lemon and lime are very much “bumpin’ rinds”. Where do you think 7-UP comes from? ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2009, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896/19 "2009-08-27T15:08:39Z")
> [@runner pat](#): > > The lemon and lime are very much “bumpin’ rinds”. > > Where do you think 7-UP comes from? You mean they wring out the wet spot into cans? Eww! ---
**Author:** ![Colophon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f05b48/32.png) [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2009, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896/20 "2009-08-27T15:09:18Z")
The newspaper story is even funnier if you imagine Mr Simpkins’ outraged comments voiced in a thick Yorkshire accent. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fathers-outrage-over-pornographic-candy-wrappers-and-its-not-the-onion/507896.md?page=2)