# Favorite Books that don't really exist? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 5, 2002, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951 "2002-04-05T06:33:05Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![ITR\_champion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c67d28/32.png) [@ITR\_champion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ITR_champion)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2002, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951/41 "2002-04-06T01:32:43Z")
I’ve always wanted a copy of _The Monster Book of Monsters_. ---
**Author:** ![FisherQueen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/58f4c7/32.png) [@FisherQueen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FisherQueen)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2002, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951/42 "2002-04-06T02:17:36Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by G.B.H. Hornswoggler \* > \*\* > Or Twoflower’s book about his vacation in Ankh-Morpork (though I can’t remember the title, offhand.) \*\* It was _What I Did On My Holidays_, and I refused to feel embarrassed that I know that. ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2002, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951/43 "2002-04-06T03:23:13Z")
Mine used to be _The Book of Counted Sorrows_ but it actually is going to be (or very recently was) published. Weird. Now I guess it’s _How The Ghosts Stole Christmas_. ---
**Author:** ![knock\_knock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/22d042/32.png) [@knock\_knock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knock_knock)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2002, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951/44 "2002-04-06T03:50:30Z")
The Gutless Wonder by Kilgore Trout ---
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2002, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951/45 "2002-04-06T04:13:11Z")
What about the computer-book carried around by Penny in _Inspector Gadget_? ---
**Author:** ![Hometownboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/5e9695/32.png) [@Hometownboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hometownboy)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2002, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951/46 "2002-04-06T04:23:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Spiriting Lightly \* > \*\ ***The Junior Woodchuck Manual** > > In a fix, Huey, Dewey, and Louie always pull out this book and attain instant proficiency in any discipline. No wonder Uncle Scrooge took them everywhere. \*\* Dang! Beat me to it. And I have to add that it’s the book I would most like to OWN. Thanks to Carl Barks, at least we have it as a goal. ---
**Author:** ![LurkMeister](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@LurkMeister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkMeister)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2002, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951/47 "2002-04-06T04:51:43Z")
_The Stone Pillow_ by Robert A. Heinlein ---
**Author:** ![Dijon\_Warlock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9a28c/32.png) [@Dijon\_Warlock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dijon_Warlock)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2002, 5:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951/48 "2002-04-06T05:31:31Z")
How’s about The King in Yellow? Not the [collection of stories](http://www.litrix.com/kyellow/kyell001.htm) by that title; but rather the book by that title that some of the stories were about. A single glance at its contents will lead to madness and death; and it’s self-referential, to boot! A book called The King in Yellow about a book (but a _different_ one) called The King in Yellow…the mind boggles, more or less. I’ve GOT the Necronomicon. Hard-bound. Leather. Gilt page edges. Satin ribbon marker. Reeks like a charnel house…or maybe that’s my socks. Looks supercool lying casually around my apartment, though. ---
**Author:** ![Terminus\_Est](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terminus_est/32/3087_2.png) [@Terminus\_Est](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terminus_Est)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2002, 5:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951/49 "2002-04-06T05:34:16Z")
_The Encyclopedia Galactica_ ---
**Author:** ![scr4](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/59ef9b/32.png) [@scr4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scr4)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2002, 6:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951/50 "2002-04-06T06:22:24Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Terminus Est \* > \*\*_The Encyclopedia Galactica_ \*\* Which one, Asimov or Douglas Adams? There must be others, come to think of it. I think **Oolon Colluphid** (author of the God trilogy) also wrote _Everything you never wanted to know about Sex but have been forced to find out._ ---
**Author:** ![Terminus\_Est](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terminus_est/32/3087_2.png) [@Terminus\_Est](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terminus_Est)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2002, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951/51 "2002-04-06T16:56:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by scr4 \* > **Which one, Asimov or Douglas Adams? There must be others, come to think of it.** Asimov. From Adams, I’d like the more immediately useful _Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy_. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2002, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951/52 "2002-04-06T17:13:04Z")
Qadgop the Mercotan by Sybly Whyte, of course! ---
**Author:** ![ndorward](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c2a13f/32.png) [@ndorward](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ndorward)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2002, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951/53 "2002-04-06T22:17:41Z")
The Daubanus edition of _The Dictionary of the Khazars_. ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2002, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951/54 "2002-04-07T01:05:10Z")
And then there’s the _Book of Death_ and the _Book of Life_ from **The Mummy** and its sequel. You’ve got to like a book that can raise the dead. Kewl. ---
**Author:** ![Silentgoldfish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e36b37/32.png) [@Silentgoldfish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silentgoldfish)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2002, 5:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951/55 "2002-04-07T05:59:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Binarydrone \* > \*\* > > Or the sequel; Commander Coriander and er Single Hander Belly Lander \*\* Not only did you beat me to it, but I couldn’t remember the full title (on the other hand, can you really blame me? :)). I DO remember that it was Commander Coriander Salamander though. ---
**Author:** ![Weird\_AL\_Einstein](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c67d28/32.png) [@Weird\_AL\_Einstein](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weird_AL_Einstein)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2002, 8:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951/56 "2002-04-07T08:12:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by LurkMeister \* > \*\*_The Stone Pillow_ by Robert A. Heinlein \*\* Don’t forget the companion volume, “The Sound of His Wings”. ---
**Author:** ![nightshadea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7ba0ec/32.png) [@nightshadea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nightshadea)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2002, 9:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951/57 "2002-04-07T09:19:35Z")
In mario puzos book “fools die” the character osano who was a world famous author,book reviewer and provacature was writing book for years and had strung the world along for almost decades along with his publisher When he dies he leaves it to the main character and he finds its just tons of notes and thoughts Based on the descrption of how he lived the notes would be intersting themselves ---
**Author:** ![Mephisto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/48db29/32.png) [@Mephisto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mephisto)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2002, 10:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951/58 "2002-04-07T10:21:26Z")
Didn’t Hong Kong Fuey (sp?) have some kind of ancient Kung-Fu Manual that he would consult for advise when he found himself falling out of a twenty-story buildings or chained to an anchor at the bottom of a lake and stuff? Something like that would be nice to have. ---
**Author:** ![ianzin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/ed655f/32.png) [@ianzin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ianzin)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2002, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951/59 "2002-04-07T19:25:14Z")
I’m not a Trekkie, but I imagine if I could get hold of a copy of **The Captain’s Log** I’d get a good price for it at the next ST convention. ---
**Author:** ![GIGObuster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gigobuster/32/421_2.png) [@GIGObuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GIGObuster)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2002, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951/60 "2002-04-07T19:47:23Z")
From the Wallace & Gromit clay animation shorts: The books Gromit the dog reads: _Electronics for dogs Crime and punishment_ (Not that one, this is the one written by Fido Dogstoyevsky!) _The Republic by Pluto_ And from Wallace: _Cheese tours._ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-books-that-dont-really-exist/101951.md?page=4)