# Favorite "dirty" or novelty song? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 29, 2006, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169 "2006-11-29T03:52:06Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2006, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169/41 "2006-11-29T18:11:08Z")
Unclefucker from the South Park movie is a damned catchy tune, now that I think about it. ---
**Author:** ![Quasimodem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Quasimodem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quasimodem)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2006, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169/42 "2006-11-29T18:32:05Z")
[QUOTE=Argent Towers] This song must have been plagiarised, and sanitized, by Trick Pony, then, with _“Can’t Get No Lovin.”_ (Don’t ask me why I know this song.) [/QUOTE] Since you wrote that, **Argent** I did a search on GOOGLE and came up with an oblique reference here: [http://www.langston.com/Fun\_People/1999/1999AKH.html](http://www.langston.com/Fun_People/1999/1999AKH.html) How do you know this song? 😉 Q ---
**Author:** ![flight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bbce88/32.png) [@flight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flight)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2006, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169/43 "2006-11-29T19:04:26Z")
Rodney Peters, Dear Penis [ > [@](#): > > Dear Penis, > I don’t think I like you anymore, > You used to watch me shave, > Now all u do is stare at the floor. > Oh dear Penis, > I don’t like you anymore. ]([http://www.sinteticor.com/artist\_r/rodney\_carrington\_lyrics/dear\_penis\_lyrics.html](http://www.sinteticor.com/artist_r/rodney_carrington_lyrics/dear_penis_lyrics.html)) ---
**Author:** ![flight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bbce88/32.png) [@flight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flight)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2006, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169/44 "2006-11-29T19:05:31Z")
Whoops, make that Rodney Carrington. ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2006, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169/45 "2006-11-29T19:15:57Z")
[QUOTE=gigi] I almost hurt myself laughing at one about the Pope and rosaries and something…? My friend had some records from probably the 70s or 80s. Very funny. [/QUOTE] Vatican Rag - from That Was the Year That Was from 1965. Bow your head with great respect and genuflect genuflect genuflect He got in trouble playing that during a fundraiser for Ch. 13, the PBS station in New York. ---
**Author:** ![HoboStew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/f17d59/32.png) [@HoboStew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HoboStew)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2006, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169/46 "2006-11-29T19:23:16Z")
One of my favorites that I can’t find anywhere and cant remember the artist, was **The Mom Rap**. It was just a bunch of mom jokes and 80’s video game references, but I absolutely loved it. I remember most of the lyrics: _I saw your momma, wearing a rug, spending all of her quarters col’ playin Dig Dug Thats a pretty cool rhyme but your momma plays Burger Time eatin’ up the pickles with a little squeeze of lime There goes your momma playin Afterburner, jiggling the joystick like it’s a butter churner Your momma is wack man, always playing Pacman, tried to pick her up but I threw out my back man Isn’t that your momma playin Terminator 2 with her liquid metal booty all oozin that goo? Your momma gets none when she’s playin Outrun. She’s kinda like a steak 'cause she’s always gettin done. Rare, ya, over there, she played Elevator Action and they made her take the stairs._ Theres more but I don’t remember it all. Wish I could find the song… ---
**Author:** ![BunnyTVS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@BunnyTVS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BunnyTVS)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2006, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169/47 "2006-11-29T19:37:11Z")
**Your Mothers got a Penis** by **Goldie Lookin’ Chain** always makes me chuckle. > [@](#): > > It’s a shock to me and it’s a shock to you. > Your mothers got a beard, sandals and a penis too. > > You know it don’t look right when she’s walkin’ down the street, > To see her ball-bag jiggin’ to the beat of her feet. > > You know why? Your Mother’s got a penis And as the season approaches there’s always **Bob Rivers**. I particularly like the Nat King Cole impersonation on **Chipmunks Roasting on an Open Fire** ---
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2006, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169/48 "2006-11-29T19:42:26Z")
“Detachable Penis” by King Missle. Dirty songs I’d have to say: “Strokin’” by Clarence Carter “Baby Got Back” by Sir Mix-a-Lot (I like big butts and I cannot lie.) ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2006, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169/49 "2006-11-29T19:51:49Z")
[QUOTE=control-z] “Strokin’” by Clarence Carter [/QUOTE] Hee hee! My friend saw him perform that on PBS and loved it (he’s 53 with the dirty mind of a 14-year-old); his son subsequently got the mp3 or whatever you whippersnappers call it (hippity hoppity music) and blasted it throughout the house. ---
**Author:** ![Critical1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@Critical1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Critical1)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2006, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169/50 "2006-11-29T20:01:37Z")
Steely Dan “the Fez” its a safe sex anthem that no-one seems to know about. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2006, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169/51 "2006-11-29T20:17:20Z")
25 years ago a song was making the rounds via cassette tape, but a Google search fails to reveal who originally did it. It was a woman with a very sexy voice doing the crooner thing with a big band. The name of the song was Everybody’s Fucking But Me. I can still hear the song in my head, but the only lyrics I can remember are Men seem to look right through me Even my dog won’t do me ---
**Author:** ![fishbicycle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aeb1de/32.png) [@fishbicycle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fishbicycle)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2006, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169/52 "2006-11-29T20:25:55Z")
Nobody’s mentioned Meri Wilson’s “Telephone Man” yet. That’s more double-entendre than actual dirt. Still funny, though! And back in the '50s, there was Ruth Wallis, who made a career out of double-entendre songs, the most famous of which is “The Dinghy Song”. She even started her own record label. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2006, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169/53 "2006-11-29T20:35:29Z")
[QUOTE=fishbicycle] Nobody’s mentioned Meri Wilson’s “Telephone Man” yet. [/QUOTE] That’s because it was a dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb song. Yech. But if we’re talking about novelty songs that weren’t dirty, there was one in the late 70s called Eugene. These sexy-sounding girls would sing “Ooh, who’s that sexy guy?” Then a really doofy sounding guy would respond “Uh… uh… uh… Eugene!” ---
**Author:** ![Ferd\_Burfel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecccb3/32.png) [@Ferd\_Burfel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferd_Burfel)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2006, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169/54 "2006-11-29T21:28:33Z")
One of my favorites from Dr. Demento was “Please Don’t Bang On The Piano” ---
**Author:** ![Ca3799](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9f8e36/32.png) [@Ca3799](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ca3799)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2006, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169/55 "2006-11-29T23:33:37Z")
“Let’s Talk dirty to the Animals” by Gilda Radner is one I enjoyed! lyrics: [http://home.rochester.rr.com/dietch/lyrics/letstalk.txt](http://home.rochester.rr.com/dietch/lyrics/letstalk.txt) listen here: [http://play.rhapsody.com/gildaradner/livefromnewyork/letstalkdirtytotheanimals?didAutoplayBounce=true](http://play.rhapsody.com/gildaradner/livefromnewyork/letstalkdirtytotheanimals?didAutoplayBounce=true) ---
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2006, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169/56 "2006-11-30T00:43:48Z")
Came back here to mention “Detachable Penis” but someone beat me to it. So I’ll go with “I Wanna be your Dog” And…there was a song they used to play on my college radio station called “Fist Fuckers Inc.” Catchy little tune. ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2006, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169/57 "2006-11-30T02:27:29Z")
'We’re having a gang bang" by Black Lace is a catchy little tune. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2006, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169/58 "2006-11-30T02:40:41Z")
[QUOTE=lieu] Yep. **Chefguy** , this was on the jukebox at _The Birdhouse_ before it burned down. [/QUOTE] A sad, sad day, that. ---
**Author:** ![NicePete](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ee7513/32.png) [@NicePete](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NicePete)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2006, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169/59 "2006-11-30T03:22:54Z")
Over 50 posts and nobody has mentioned Frank Zappa yet. Criminal! How about: Titties and Beer Do You Like My New Car? Why Does it Hurt When I Pee? The Illinois Enema Bandit or Bobby Brown to name but a few… ---
**Author:** ![Max\_the\_Immortal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/6de8d8/32.png) [@Max\_the\_Immortal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_the_Immortal)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2006, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169/60 "2006-11-30T03:33:19Z")
I rather like Electric Six’s “Vibrator”. An honorable mention goes to Family Guy’s “You Have AIDS” song. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-dirty-or-novelty-song/382169.md?page=4)