# Favorite fake product names? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 3, 2021, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158 "2021-02-03T19:57:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2021, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158/21 "2021-02-04T01:50:51Z")
Cheeseys, a Cheetohs fake in a comic book titled “Fusion.” They also had Bheer. I don’t remember where Cheesey-poofs come from. And…this might actually be real, but my dad liked to sing the jingle for “Finnegan’s Fartless Frijoles.” (I just searched and got no hits.) ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2021, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158/22 "2021-02-04T02:10:37Z")
_ **The Nut Bra** _— to keep saggy old men from sagging! **CAUTION:** Slightly NSFW. 😏 [Nut Bra - YouTube](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s6Xaa6R9rGA) ---
**Author:** ![TiberiusNeroClaudius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f04885/32.png) [@TiberiusNeroClaudius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TiberiusNeroClaudius)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2021, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158/23 "2021-02-04T02:17:13Z")
“Beer Bad” episode of “Buffy the Vampire Slayer Slayer” had “Black Frost” beer. Perfect for turning snotty college students into Neanderthals for a day thanks to a warlock brother in law. Once upon a time for fictitious movies they refer to it as “Another Dawn”. So when they couldn’t think of a name for a mediocre 1937 Errol Flynn movie ( which had a good score by Erich Korngold) guess what they called it. I remember one sitcom where a radio station said its call sign was WIFE…the station most men were married to. ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2021, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158/24 "2021-02-04T05:58:28Z")
> [@Trinopus](#): > > I don’t remember where Cheesey-poofs come from _South Park_. I don’t know why, but that’s what we call Cheetos now. And, of course, if my childhood viewing habits taught me anything, it’s to steer clear of any ACME products. ---
**Author:** ![Banksiaman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/banksiaman/32/3334_2.png) [@Banksiaman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Banksiaman)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2021, 6:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158/25 "2021-02-04T06:47:25Z")
A blink-and-you’ll-miss-it one from the _Simpsons_ - **Gorilla’s Choice brand bananas**. ---
**Author:** ![Kimble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kimble/32/19185_2.png) [@Kimble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimble)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2021, 6:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158/26 "2021-02-04T06:57:35Z")
I liked 30 Rock’s knockoff Cheetos, Sabor de Soledad. > [@Jackmannii](#): > > You may remember Provasic a.k.a. RDU-90 had a sensational if short vogue back in the early '90s when it was marketed by Devlin MacGregor Pharmaceuticals. (“absolutely no side effects”) I looked into that. Turned out it caused liver damage. Whoops! ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2021, 6:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158/27 "2021-02-04T06:58:56Z")
Bear Whiz Beer: “It’s in the water. That’s why it’s yellow.” ---
**Author:** ![F.U.Shakespeare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aca169/32.png) [@F.U.Shakespeare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/F.U.Shakespeare)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2021, 7:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158/28 "2021-02-04T07:11:21Z")
On _Beavis and Butthead_, there was “Home Labyrinth” (Home Depot?). _The Simpsons_ had the gun shop, “Blood Bath and Beyond”. And many others. ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2021, 7:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158/29 "2021-02-04T07:17:42Z")
> [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > In the 70 before generics became popular (BEER), and before [art departments got really creative](https://insidethecask.com/2019/08/20/do-you-recognise-these-fictional-drinks-brands-from-hollywood-films-and-tv/), a lot of TV shows used a fake beer can that looked similar to a Budweiser but just said “beer”. I spotted them in both red and blue. Somewhat similarly, take a close look at any magazine a character in a 70s or 80s sitcom is reading. The title can be plausible according to the character (an adult male might be reading “Playpen,” or “Sports In Pictures”; while an adult woman might be reading “Women’s House Journal”, and anybody might be reading “Tempo”), which fit the OP’s criteria; but then, look to the back cover of the magazine. Often, you’ll see a “V” in a circle, and if you’re lucky, the word “Valiant.” It’s an advertisement for Valiant cigarettes, a brand that doesn’t exist, but that an ad could be designed for, and reused in many sitcoms; much like your fake Budweiser beer cans. Interestingly, the imaginary brand of Valiant cigarettes, with much the same logo, were an important part of the plot in the 1971 movie _Cold Turkey_, about a town that agrees to quit smoking for 30 days. I guess that’s where the Valiant brand and ads started. If I’ve noticed these things, I’ve probably watched too many old reruns. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2021, 8:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158/30 "2021-02-04T08:02:27Z")
> [@F.U.Shakespeare](#): > > On _Beavis and Butthead_ , there was “Home Labyrinth” (Home Depot?). Oh, that reminds me: Quest Buy! > **[Quest Buy (store)](https://starvstheforcesofevil.fandom.com/wiki/Quest_Buy_(store))** > > Quest Buy is a maze-like retail store that is first featured in the episode with the same name. The store goes out of business and shuts down in "Out of Business". The store has a medieval theme to it, with flags and other middle ages-style objects... ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2021, 8:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158/31 "2021-02-04T08:12:29Z")
“We used to roast Stay Puft Marshmallows around the fire, at camp…” ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2021, 9:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158/32 "2021-02-04T09:50:01Z")
From _L’il Abner_: Kickapoo Joy Juice. I think someone may have actually tried marketing a product called that once. but the comic came first. ---
**Author:** ![Fiendish\_Astronaut](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fiendish_astronaut/32/3295_2.png) [@Fiendish\_Astronaut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiendish_Astronaut)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2021, 10:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158/33 "2021-02-04T10:07:34Z")
Ritalout in South Park (the opposite of the drug Ritalin) ---
**Author:** ![N9IWP](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/n9iwp/32/3154_2.png) [@N9IWP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/N9IWP)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2021, 11:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158/34 "2021-02-04T11:45:36Z")
Not a fake product, but a fake company. In the city builder game Suburbia, one of the tiles is name “Lactose Princess” Brian ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2021, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158/35 "2021-02-04T14:32:31Z")
[Food Clown](https://mittendrinnen.files.wordpress.com/2010/03/1f3b3-email0638.jpg) Grocery store from National Lampoon. Many fine items there like Turkey Flakes, canned salad, etc. [Crelm toothpaste](https://montypython.gifglobe.com/scene/?id=4d44MxlZGy6V) from MPFC ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2021, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158/36 "2021-02-04T14:46:18Z")
Powdermilk Biscuits - “Made from whole wheat raised in the rich bottomlands of the Lake Wobegon river valley by Norwegian bachelor farmers; so you know they’re not only good for you, but pure… mostly. Buy them ready-made in the big blue box with the picture of the biscuit on the cover, or in the brown bag with the dark stains that indicate freshness. Whole wheat that gives shy persons the strength to get up and do what needs to be done. Heavens, they’re tasty, and expeditious!” from Prairie Home Companion ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2021, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158/37 "2021-02-04T15:10:38Z")
Loogggg… Rolls down stairs Alone or in pairs Rolls over your neighbor’s dog What’s great for a snack? And fits on your back It’s Log, Log, Log! It’s Lo-og, it’s Lo-og, It’s big, it’s heavy it’s wood. It’s Lo-og, it’s Lo-og, Better than bad it’s good! From Ren & Stimpy. It’s a toy that’s a log. The jingle is a take-off on Slinky. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2021, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158/38 "2021-02-04T15:13:37Z")
> On _Beavis and Butthead_ , there was “Home Labyrinth” (Home Depot?). One of the fun things about watching reruns of _Chuck_ is that the characters work at a big box electronics store… the BUY MORE. The level of detail and parody of Best Buy is great. [![](https://filming.90210locations.info/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/buy_more_orig1.jpg) ](https://filming.90210locations.info/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/buy_more_orig1.jpg) In the mall, next to LargeMart and Underpants Etc. Notice the “Nerd Herd”(like BB’s Geek Squad) fleet of Toyota Yarises. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2021, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158/39 "2021-02-04T15:24:56Z")
Acme (from the Roadrunner cartoons) made many fine products, like the Jet-Powered Pogo Stick, Triple-Strength Fortified Leg Muscle Vitamins, the Giant Rubber Band, and Earthquake Pills (why wait, create your own earthquake!). ---
**Author:** ![wjChia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/d6d6ee/32.png) [@wjChia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wjChia)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2021, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158/40 "2021-02-04T15:26:00Z")
We have Kickapoo Joy Juice here in Malaysia! Pretty tasty drink, IMO [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-fake-product-names/932158.md?page=3)