# Favorite Futurama Episodes/Quotes **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 18, 2004, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494 "2004-12-18T05:58:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Not\_A\_Tame\_Lion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/e36b37/32.png) [@Not\_A\_Tame\_Lion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Not_A_Tame_Lion)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2004, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494/101 "2004-12-20T20:48:27Z")
Along with many alread quoted: The end of Hermes’s Bureaucracy song: Bender: “I am Bender, please insert liquor!” The whole sequence in “Brannigan Begin Again” (I think that’s the right title) that parodies _Midnight Cowboy_ just sends me rolling off the couch every time I see it. Zoidberg, courting Edna on his home planet: Fry: “Tell her she looks thin.” Zoidberg: “You look malnourished. Do you have internal parasites?” ---
**Author:** ![Katisha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bcef8e/32.png) [@Katisha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Katisha)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2004, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494/102 "2004-12-20T21:18:15Z")
This thread makes me ridiculously happy. 😉 > [@Merkwurdigliebe](#): > > Farnsworth has the best delievery of any character in the series. I like this bit from “The Day The Earth Stood Stupid”: Leela: Ow! Fire hot! Professor: The Professie will help! [_reaches into fireplace to retrieve burning note_] Waugh! Fire indeed hot! …okay, that one doesn’t really work in text, but it’s inexplicably hilarious in the episode. 😉 BTW, I got the “You changed the outcome by measuring it!” joke, and I’m an English major. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Alma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecd19e/32.png) [@Alma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alma)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2004, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494/103 "2004-12-20T21:26:13Z")
> [@continuity eror](#): > > “Fix it fix it fix it fix it fix it… fix it fix it.” You know, no matter how much an IT guy likes Futurama, when something goes wrong with your computer, I’ve learned it’s a _bad_ idea to toss this quote at him. Anyway, my boyfriend and I can’t drink or be near that fizzy white beverage without calling it Cham-pag-in in an ultra pseudo-sexy voice. ---
**Author:** ![Cliffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/59ef9b/32.png) [@Cliffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cliffy)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2004, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494/104 "2004-12-20T21:31:35Z")
> [@Not A Tame Lion](#): > > Zoidberg: “You look malnourished. Do you have internal parasites?” Why yes! Thank you for noticing. –Cliffy ---
**Author:** ![Avumede](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/avumede/32/7235_2.png) [@Avumede](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Avumede)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2004, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494/105 "2004-12-20T21:33:43Z")
Greatest Fry line: Coin-operated gypsy: Have you heard of the Monks of [something or other]? Fry: I’ve _not_ heard of them. It’s all in the delivery, which is so perfect I’m just waiting for the opportunity to use this line myself. ---
**Author:** ![Not\_A\_Tame\_Lion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/e36b37/32.png) [@Not\_A\_Tame\_Lion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Not_A_Tame_Lion)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2004, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494/106 "2004-12-20T22:19:20Z")
From “Anthology Of Interest I”: Mr. Pannuci: Hey! You forgot your pizza. Stephen Hawking: Throw it in the garbage. and Hawking (stealing Fry’s idea): I call it a Hawking hole… Maybe it’s just that computerized voice… also — I love the episode when Bender adopts the orphans, and he entertains them by reading his arrest record (and shows them his mug shot). ---
**Author:** ![Battle\_Pope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4bbf92/32.png) [@Battle\_Pope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Battle_Pope)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2004, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494/107 "2004-12-20T22:53:04Z")
“A Pharoah to Remember” does have one great moment when the Priests are choosing a new Pharoah: High Priest: Great Wall of Prophecy, reveal to us God’s will so that we may blindly obey. Worshipers: Free us from thought and responsibility. High Priest: We shall read things off you… Worshipers: …and do them. High Priest: You’re words guide us. Worshipers: We’re dumb. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2004, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494/108 "2004-12-20T23:48:52Z")
From the episode where Bender turns into a were-car (why no Transformer jokes?): > [@](#): > > **Bender** : Uh, pardon me, my good simpleton, could you take us to yon castle? > > [He points to a huge imposing castle on a mountain top. The townsfolk mutter and run indoors. An old hunchbacked robot hobbles towards the crew.] > > **Robot #1** : Some say unholy things happen up there. > > **Robot #2** : For example: All of us say that. > > **Farnsworth** : Fuf! Superstitious robot mumbo-jumbo. > > **Robot #2** : Mumbo, perhaps. Jumbo, perhaps not! With all your modern science are you any closer to understanding the mystery of how a robot walks or talks? > > **Farnsworth** : Yes, you idiot. [He opens the robot’s chest cabinet.] The circuit diagram is right here on the inside of your case. > > [The robot slams it shut.] > > **Robot #2** : I choose to believe what I was programmed to believe. A classic riff off all the Universal Horror Classic flicks. 🆒😃 ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2004, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494/109 "2004-12-20T23:52:10Z")
And from the same episode– > [@](#): > > Yokelbot: Get ye to your house, ye ignorant villagers. > > [He pokes Bender with his pitchfork.] > > Leela: We are not ignorant villagers, we’re sophisticated New New Yorkers. _ **Whup his butt!** _ 😃 ---
**Author:** ![pepperlandgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f17d59/32.png) [@pepperlandgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pepperlandgirl)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2004, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494/110 "2004-12-21T00:12:03Z")
Bender: Ahhh, Christmas Eve. Another worthless day where I accomplish absolutely nothing. ---
**Author:** ![Sir\_Dirx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b77776/32.png) [@Sir\_Dirx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sir_Dirx)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2004, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494/111 "2004-12-21T02:30:16Z")
> [@Avumede](#): > > Greatest Fry line: > > Coin-operated gypsy: Have you heard of the Monks of [something or other]? > Fry: I’ve _not_ heard of them. > > It’s all in the delivery, which is so perfect I’m just waiting for the opportunity to use this line myself. I love those monks 😃 Trapped Monk: “Let us out! We cooked our shoes in the dryer and ate them! Now we’re bored!” and (horribly paraphrased) Monk 1: “He speaks out of love for his friend. What if this love _is_ God?” Monk 2: “Oh, how convenient, a theory about God that doesn’t involve looking through a telescope! Get back to work!” ---
**Author:** ![Ike\_Witt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ike_witt/32/283_2.png) [@Ike\_Witt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ike_Witt)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2004, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494/112 "2004-12-21T03:02:03Z")
**Preacher Bot** : Wretched sinner unit the path to robot heaven lies here, in the good book 3.0. **Bender** : Hey, do I preach to you when you’re lying stoned in the gutter? Noooo, so beat it. **Fry** : Who was that guy? **Bender** : Your momma. Now shut up and drag me to work. ---
**Author:** ![Kamino\_Neko](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kamino_neko/32/34_2.png) [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2004, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494/113 "2004-12-21T03:03:13Z")
After Zoidberg’s underwater shell house burns down. \ How did this happen? \ _confused_ That’s a very good question… \ Oooh, that’s where my cigar went. \ THAT JUST BRINGS UP MORE QUESTIONS!!! ---
**Author:** ![SolGrundy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bbce88/32.png) [@SolGrundy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SolGrundy)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2004, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494/114 "2004-12-21T03:13:37Z")
I just found this quote on a website, from an episode I haven’t seen yet. May be my new favorite: Gay Hippie: They called me crazy for building this ark. Old Hippie: You ARE crazy. You filled it with same sex animal couples. Gay Hippie: Hey, there are parts of the bible I like and parts I don’t like. And my favorite bit from the Star Trek episode: Bender: But what about those of us who don’t like “Star Trek?” Walter Koenig: Yeah! ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2004, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494/115 "2004-12-21T04:19:31Z")
Fry: I’m gonna spin until I fall down! [completes half a spin and falls down] For some reason this always cracks me up. Similarly: Fry: I’ve got an idea. Leela: [instantly] I’ve got a better idea. Of course hearing Sigourney Weaver as the ship was a wild combination of sexy and really really really creepy. ---
**Author:** ![Arch\_Trout](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9f8e36/32.png) [@Arch\_Trout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arch_Trout)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2004, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494/116 "2004-12-21T04:31:11Z")
**Calculon** “Great Shatner’s ghost.” Love the fact that a hammy robot actor should revere the Shat-Man. ---
**Author:** ![Kamino\_Neko](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kamino_neko/32/34_2.png) [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2004, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494/117 "2004-12-21T04:37:44Z")
Oh, another good one from the episode I quoted above… \ (After failing to pour wine from a sunken pirate ship into his mouth underwater) Aaarr…the Laws of Science be a harsh mistress. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2004, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494/118 "2004-12-21T04:39:54Z")
> [@Arch Trout](#): > > **Calculon** “Great Shatner’s ghost.” > > Love the fact that a hammy robot actor should revere the Shat-Man. “I was all of history’s great acting robots! Acting Unit 0.8, Thespo-mat, David Duchovny!” ---
**Author:** ![Fern\_Forest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/71c47a/32.png) [@Fern\_Forest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fern_Forest)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2004, 6:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494/119 "2004-12-21T06:35:33Z")
One of my favorite episodes that hasn’t been mentioned yet is “Teenage Mutant Leela’s Hurdles.” The sequence that cracks me up the most is the complete insensitivity of Fry, Bender and Zapp when they’re captured in “Amazon Women in the Mood.” ---
**Author:** ![Trion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ccd318/32.png) [@Trion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trion)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2004, 11:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494/120 "2004-12-21T11:26:44Z")
Favorite Episode: Roswell That Ends Well President Truman to Zoidberg: Are you here to create some kind of human-alien hybrid? Zoidberg: Are you coming on to me? President Truman: Hot crackers! I take exception to that! Zoidberg: I’m not hearing a no. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-futurama-episodes-quotes/280494.md?page=7)