# Favorite Joss Whedon Lines **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 26, 2016, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189 "2016-04-26T15:09:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2016, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189/41 "2016-04-26T23:23:48Z")
The exchange that sold me on the show was from “Some Assembly Required:” Xander: And speaking of love… Willow: We were talking about the reanimation of dead tissue. Xander: Do I deconstruct _your_ segues? Yeesh! Right then I turned to the cat and proclaimed “This show is written by English majors!” ---
**Author:** ![Motorgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e36b37/32.png) [@Motorgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Motorgirl)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2016, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189/42 "2016-04-26T23:43:38Z")
Jayne: If wishes were horses, we’d all be eating steak. ---
**Author:** ![Goofus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7feea3/32.png) [@Goofus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Goofus)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2016, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189/43 "2016-04-26T23:51:16Z")
I looked up the episode and it seems my favorite Buffy line was written by Jane Espenson, so I got nuthin’. ---
**Author:** ![Mahaloth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mahaloth/32/1079_2.png) [@Mahaloth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mahaloth)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2016, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189/44 "2016-04-27T00:25:07Z")
I misquote is somewhat, but I love to use the line “Seriously…how did your brain even learn human speech?” From Firefly. ---
**Author:** ![outlierrn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/outlierrn/32/3005_2.png) [@outlierrn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/outlierrn)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2016, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189/45 "2016-04-27T01:10:45Z")
More of a scene than a line, but… I adore you, _shove_ but I need the other guy. ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2016, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189/46 "2016-04-27T02:26:06Z")
From the _Buffy The Vampire Slayer_ movie: “You ruined my new jacket! Kill him a lot.” ---
**Author:** ![Fugazi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f08c70/32.png) [@Fugazi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fugazi)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2016, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189/47 "2016-04-27T04:13:56Z")
This is a paraphrase, but I’m pretty close Principal Snyder. “There’s something going on here, I can smell it. Like a 6th sense” Giles, “No, that would be one of the five” ---
**Author:** ![Rick\_Kitchen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rick_kitchen/32/522_2.png) [@Rick\_Kitchen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick_Kitchen)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2016, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189/48 "2016-04-27T04:33:57Z")
Willow: “I’m so evil and… skanky. And I think I’m kinda gay.” ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2016, 4:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189/49 "2016-04-27T04:44:40Z")
> [@](#): > > Giles: Can you move? > > Ben: Need a… a minute. She could’ve killed me. > > Giles: No, she couldn’t. Never. And sooner or later, Glory will reemerge and make Buffy pay for that mercy, and the world with her. Buffy even knows that, and still she couldn’t take a human life. She’s a hero, you see. She’s not like us. > > Ben: Us? My favorite moment in the series. Giles as the quiet badass who does the things the Buffy should never do. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2016, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189/50 "2016-04-27T04:57:04Z")
> [@Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](#): > > That really proves my point. Whedon took one mildly funny toss off line that was probably worth of a single callback and tried to turn it into a running gag about how Steve Rogers is so old fashioned. Obviously I disagree. I don’t feel it was overused. I think the way Whedon kept having different characters make the joke was what made it work. Having different characters participating in the same inside joke quietly illustrating how close the team had gotten. It made it obvious that they hung out together and talked between the onscreen scenes without belaboring the point. ---
**Author:** ![Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stranger_On_A_Train)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2016, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189/51 "2016-04-27T05:10:00Z")
Did you find _Avengers: Age of Ultron_ as consistently engaging and entertaining as the original _Avengers_? Because if you did, you are (in my experience) in the minority. _Avengers_ was Whedon in peak form; _Age of Ultron_ was Whedon in formulaic mode, which even he admitted to being creatively drained by the process along with all of the other work and doubtless some script doctoring he was doing for the other MCU films and the lackluster _Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D_. I look forward to future good work from Joss Whedon; he’s certainly demonstrated that he is capable of it, especially when he has full creative control of a project. But _Age of Ultron_ does not reflect that, either in the dialogue or plotting. It’s a fairly by the numbers and neutral flim only occasionally punctuated by the kind of wit that is usually a highlight of his other work. Stranger ---
**Author:** ![Johanna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johanna/32/8318_2.png) [@Johanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johanna)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2016, 8:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189/52 "2016-04-27T08:50:21Z")
Buffy: Willow, what are you doing for Christmas? Willow: Being Jewish. Hello! ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2016, 9:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189/53 "2016-04-27T09:24:34Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > And this: > > Steve Rogers: You get hurt, hurt 'em back. You get killed… walk it off. Cap: …but if you put the hammer in an elevator… Stark: It would still go up. Cap: Elevator’s not worthy. Thor: I’m going to miss these little talks of ours. ---
**Author:** ![Dante\_G](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/977dab/32.png) [@Dante\_G](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dante_G)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2016, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189/54 "2016-04-27T14:44:50Z")
> [@Goofus](#): > > I looked up the episode and it seems my favorite Buffy line was written by Jane Espenson, so I got nuthin’. I’ll allow it … it’s from Whedon’s show, so have it. ---
**Author:** ![JSexton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/96bed5/32.png) [@JSexton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JSexton)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2016, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189/55 "2016-04-27T15:30:17Z")
> [@Goofus](#): > > I looked up the episode and it seems my favorite Buffy line was written by Jane Espenson, so I got nuthin’. I’d imagine that despite the credits, most shows had input from all the writers. So that line may well be a Whedon line. Or, conversely, half the lines in this thread may actually be Espenson lines for all we know. ---
**Author:** ![Banquet\_Bear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/banquet_bear/32/373_2.png) [@Banquet\_Bear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Banquet_Bear)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2016, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189/56 "2016-04-27T15:35:09Z")
[quote=“Santos\_L\_Halper, post:26, topic:753189”] I gotta say Joss’s shows are responsible for a good bit of my favorite lines (Aaron Sorkin’s created a bunch too) but my all-time favorite bit of dialog is this scene: [/QUOTE] …did you see this back when it happened? > **[A Russian Woman Speaks Out For LGBT Rights Using A Line From A Joss Whedon Show](https://www.buzzfeed.com/ellievhall/the-daily-show-found-a-woman-in-russia-to-speak-out-for-lgbt?utm_term=.pdG1zB3w2B)** > > As she said on The Daily Show, "If nothing we do matters, then all that matters is what we do." That scene was literally inspirational. ---
**Author:** ![epbrown01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ba0ec/32.png) [@epbrown01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/epbrown01)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2016, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189/57 "2016-04-27T16:34:34Z")
“He’s gotta be old. I heard him say ‘newfangled’ once.” “We’ll split up and search - it’ll be faster.” Everyone rushes off but Willow, who mutters “…but not _safer_.” “He said he was going through all these changes - then he went through all these changes, and he’s a werewolf!” “Are you not used to being given orders?” “When Giles sends me on a mission, he says ‘Please.’ And when I get back, I get a cookie!” “You’re not helping.” “I know. I feel just sick about it.” “Bit of sunlight, stake though the heart. It’s like falling off a log.” “Buffy. Seriously. You need every square inch of your ass kicked.” ---
**Author:** ![Dante\_G](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/977dab/32.png) [@Dante\_G](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dante_G)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2016, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189/58 "2016-04-27T17:06:30Z")
From\* Buffy\* Willow : He said he wasn’t coming back until he’d driven to all fifty states. Buffy : Did you explain about Hawaii? Willow : Well, he seemed so determined. ---
**Author:** ![RikWriter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/49beb7/32.png) [@RikWriter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RikWriter)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2016, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189/59 "2016-04-27T17:42:38Z")
> [@Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](#): > > Did you find _Avengers: Age of Ultron_ as consistently engaging and entertaining as the original _Avengers_? Because if you did, you are (in my experience) in the minority. If you say so. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2016, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189/60 "2016-04-27T17:47:24Z")
> [@Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](#): > > Did you find _Avengers: Age of Ultron_ as consistently engaging and entertaining as the original _Avengers_? Because if you did, you are (in my experience) in the minority. No, I don’t feel the second movie was as good as the first one. But I also don’t feel it was as bad as you seem to. May I ask how many times you saw it? Personally, I found it worked a lot better the second time I watched it. The first time I watched it, it seemed chaotic and unstructured. But the second time, I knew the overall plot going in and I noticed it actually held up pretty well with a lot of apparently meaningless details that fit together to support the story. So the structure is there. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-joss-whedon-lines/753189.md?page=4)