# Favorite last words **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 4, 2006, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841 "2006-12-04T18:53:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2006, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841/1 "2006-12-04T18:53:00Z")
“Crito, I owe a cock to Asclepius. Will you remember to pay the debt?” – Socrates What are your faves? What famous recorded/reputed last words do you consider most memorable, timeless, classic, and/or fucking-sick awesome? ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2006, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841/2 "2006-12-04T19:13:37Z")
“Hold my beer and watch this…” -Unknown Redneck ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2006, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841/3 "2006-12-04T19:36:02Z")
“Either that wallpaper goes, or I do.” (Oscar Wilde) ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2006, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841/4 "2006-12-04T19:47:37Z")
Edgar “Doc” Tillyer, the guru of American Optical, lay in a semi-coma in the Southbridge, MA Hospital. A doctor looked in and commented, “So this is the great Doc Tillyer with 100 patents?” Doc, still pretty much out of it, commented back “200 patents” He actually had about 150, but who’s going to correct a comatose dying genius? Especially one who scored a _bon mot_ in that state? ---
**Author:** ![Wee\_Bairn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/90db22/32.png) [@Wee\_Bairn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wee_Bairn)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2006, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841/5 "2006-12-04T19:50:38Z")
Probably a UL, but Terry Kath of Chicago supposedly said something to the effect of “don’t worry, it’s not loaded”, before blowing his brains out. ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2006, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841/6 "2006-12-04T19:51:05Z")
Purported story, but my fave nonetheless: Ethan Allen, the patriot was on his deathbed. Someone who was there said, “Ethan, the angels are waiting for you.” Ethan replied, “Well God damn them, let 'em wait.” ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2006, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841/7 "2006-12-04T19:53:29Z")
“It would be nearly impossible for the opposing forces to have their leaden shot successfully penetrate the epidermis of a member of _Proboscidea_ when there is this patently high amount of space betwe…” ---
**Author:** ![engineer\_comp\_geek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/engineer_comp_geek/32/504_2.png) [@engineer\_comp\_geek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/engineer_comp_geek)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2006, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841/8 "2006-12-04T19:54:09Z")
“They couldn’t hit an elephant at this dist–.” - General John Sedgwick, killed by a Confederate sharpshooter in 1864 “How about this for a headline for tomorrow’s paper? French fries.” - James French, executed by electric chair in Oklahoma, 1966 ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2006, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841/9 "2006-12-04T19:55:55Z")
Pioneering high-ass drag queen **Bert Savoy** was struck by lightning on a beach in 1923, after (supposedly, but it’s a great story) saying after a crash of thunder, “Mmm-mmm, ain’t Miss God kickin’ up something fierce!” ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2006, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841/10 "2006-12-04T20:06:01Z")
“Texas. Texas. Margaret…” - General Sam Houston This one is a tad macabre, but here you go: A link to the last statements of executed offenders from Texas’ Death Row. [http://www.tdcj.state.tx.us/stat/executedoffenders.htm](http://www.tdcj.state.tx.us/stat/executedoffenders.htm) ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2006, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841/11 "2006-12-04T20:15:13Z")
While Artist Toulouse-Lautrec was on his deathbed he looked at his father and said, “I knew you’d be here for the kill.” Later, his last words were reportedly (directed at his father), “look at the old fool.” ---
**Author:** ![MovieMogul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f08c70/32.png) [@MovieMogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MovieMogul)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2006, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841/12 "2006-12-04T20:37:12Z")
“Let us cross over the river, and rest under the shade of the trees.” – Stonewall Jackson “Dying is easy. Comedy is hard.” – Sir Donald Wolfit ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2006, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841/13 "2006-12-04T20:39:14Z")
[QUOTE=pravnik] A link to the last statements of executed offenders from Texas’ Death Row. [http://www.tdcj.state.tx.us/stat/executedoffenders.htm](http://www.tdcj.state.tx.us/stat/executedoffenders.htm) [/QUOTE] That is an absolutely fascinating website, thanks **pravnik.** ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2006, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841/14 "2006-12-04T22:22:19Z")
The last dispatch of writer/explorer Richard Halliburton, while at sea: “Southerly gales, rain squalls, lee rail under water, wet bunks, hardtack, bully beef. Having wonderful time. Wish you were here- instead of me” ---
**Author:** ![Menocchio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9de053/32.png) [@Menocchio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Menocchio)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2006, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841/15 "2006-12-04T22:40:49Z")
“This is funny.”-“Doc” Holliday ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2006, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841/16 "2006-12-04T22:46:46Z")
As Woody Allen said “I’m not afraid of dying. I just don’t want to be there when it happens!” ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2006, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841/17 "2006-12-04T23:22:11Z")
Nelson: “Engage the enemy more closely.” OK, it was his last signal - his last words to his men. ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2006, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841/18 "2006-12-04T23:36:27Z")
[QUOTE=pravnik] This one is a tad macabre, but here you go: A link to the last statements of executed offenders from Texas’ Death Row. [http://www.tdcj.state.tx.us/stat/executedoffenders.htm](http://www.tdcj.state.tx.us/stat/executedoffenders.htm) [/QUOTE] Wow. Thanks for the link. I read 15-20 of them, and they were pretty underwhelming. Most of them were just kind of sad and banal. An interesting window into what goes through the mind of someone who knows he’s about to die. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![jimmmy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/73ab20/32.png) [@jimmmy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jimmmy)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2006, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841/19 "2006-12-04T23:43:28Z")
To me John Adams death scene was always kind of goosebumpy - he dies on the 50th Anniversary of the Declaration of Independence, he is 92, his last words: “ **Thomas Jefferson still survives**.” Jefferson had died earlier that day - 50 years to the day the DoI was adopted by Congress. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841/20 "2006-12-05T01:37:52Z")
[QUOTE=OneCentStamp] Wow. Thanks for the link. I read 15-20 of them, and they were pretty underwhelming. Most of them were just kind of sad and banal. An interesting window into what goes through the mind of someone who knows he’s about to die. ☹ [/QUOTE] How come nobody ever says, “I’d do it all again!” or “I’ll see all you rat-bastard screws in Hell!”? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-last-words/382841.md?page=2)