# Favorite scenes in Family Guy **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 17, 2003, 6:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091 "2003-07-17T06:42:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![theendisnear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a4c791/32.png) [@theendisnear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/theendisnear)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2003, 7:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091/61 "2003-07-18T07:03:16Z")
Ahh found it! > [@](#): > > Girl: You are the weakest link. Goodbye! > Stewie: Oh, gosh, that’s funny. That’s really funny. Do you write your own material? Do you? Because that is so fresh. “You are the weakest link. Goodbye!” I’ve never heard anyone make that joke before. Mmm. You’re the first. I’ve never heard anyone reference, um, reference that outside the program before. Because that’s what she says on the show, right? “You are the weakest link. Goodbye!” And yet you’ve taken that, and used it out of context, to insult me in this everyday situation. Gosh, what a clever, smart girl you must be to come up with a joke like that by yourself. Mmm. That’s so fresh, too. Any Titanic jokes you want to throw at me while we’re hitting these phenomena at the height of their popularity? Because I’m right here. God, you’re so funny! ---
**Author:** ![utkik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/e8c25b/32.png) [@utkik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/utkik)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2003, 10:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091/62 "2003-07-18T10:24:14Z")
In Series 3, the one where Peter takes Chris to the Irish Museum to show him his heritage. Man I nearly pissed myself laughing when I saw that one. Especially the ‘typical Irish home’ displays - woman is on her knees praying, she falls back, and out pops a baby… funny cos it’s true ---
**Author:** ![Gerome](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/85e7bf/32.png) [@Gerome](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gerome)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2003, 1:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091/63 "2003-07-18T13:14:44Z")
_Quahog has a competition to pick the theme of their annual parade. Peter’s entry wins, and his theme was an episode of “Who’s the boss”._ Lois: Peter, I’m glad you won, but isn’t your idea a bit esoteric? Peter: Esoteric? _Zoom inside Peter’s head to reveal a bunch of guys sitting around a conference table, with a big whiteboard reading “Esoteric”._ Guy One: Could it mean “sexy”? Guy Two: I think it’s a science term. Guy Three: Guys guys guys, “esoteric” means delicious. _Zoom out of Peter’s head back to reality._ Peter: Lois…“Who’s the boss” isn’t a food. ---
**Author:** ![Nonsuch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nonsuch/32/2922_2.png) [@Nonsuch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nonsuch)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2003, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091/64 "2003-07-18T16:32:00Z")
(Chris is in the back seat of the car, waiting to be taken to soccer practice, talking to Raggedy Ann & Andy dolls he believes are Lois and Peter.) “We’re going to be late! _ **Why won’t you talk to me?!** _” ---
**Author:** ![BabaBooey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/dfb087/32.png) [@BabaBooey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BabaBooey)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2003, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091/65 "2003-07-18T19:26:27Z")
Peter’s description of an attempt to book Cheesey Charlie’s for Stewie’s birthday gone wrong: Manager dressed as Satan: "Hi, welcome to Cheesey Charlies. HEIL HITLER! ---
**Author:** ![Incubus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c68b51/32.png) [@Incubus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Incubus)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2003, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091/66 "2003-07-18T20:23:20Z")
Peter: “I’m toilet training my son, and was wondering what books you would suggest.” Bookstore Clerk: "Well, you could go with the standard, _Everybody poops_ and the not-quite-as-popular _Nobody poops except you_. Peter: "Well, see my family’s Catholic… Bookstore Clerk: "Ah, well then you’ll want _You’re a naughty boy, and that’s concentrated **evil** coming out of you_ " ---
**Author:** ![Iguana\_Boy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/ed655f/32.png) [@Iguana\_Boy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iguana_Boy)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2003, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091/67 "2003-07-18T20:39:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Gerome \* > \*\*_Quahog has a competition to pick the theme of their annual parade. Peter’s entry wins, and his theme was an episode of “Who’s the boss”._ > > Lois: Peter, I’m glad you won, but isn’t your idea a bit esoteric? > > Peter: Esoteric? > > _Zoom inside Peter’s head to reveal a bunch of guys sitting around a conference table, with a big whiteboard reading “Esoteric”._ > > Guy One: Could it mean “sexy”? > > Guy Two: I think it’s a science term. > > Guy Three: Guys guys guys, “esoteric” means delicious. > > _Zoom out of Peter’s head back to reality._ > > Peter: Lois…“Who’s the boss” isn’t a food. \*\* Immediately after which Brian says “Swing and a miss!” ---
**Author:** ![YellowTail](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/b5ac83/32.png) [@YellowTail](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YellowTail)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2003, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091/68 "2003-07-18T23:05:31Z")
The ep when Brian becomes a porno movie director was funny. Does anybody remember the movie titles? One was Shaving Private Ryan. Just got Seasons 1 & 2 on DVD yesterday. I loved Peter saying the only problem with their neighborhood was too many Jemimah’s Witnesses as a black lady tries to sell them pancakes. ---
**Author:** ![Teelo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8491ac/32.png) [@Teelo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Teelo)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2003, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091/69 "2003-07-18T23:07:25Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by herwono \* > \*\*(Peter walks up from the basemnet in a gas suit) > Chris: OH MY GOD THE GOVERNMENT HERE…RUN E.T. RUN!!! > > (ET runs across the screen screaming) \*\* What episode was this one? Peter: Don’t worry Brian I read about this in a book somewhere. Brian: Peter, are you sure it was a book? Are you sure it wasn’t nothing? Peter: Oh yeah. Peter: uh…lois go get the medical dictionary and look up, “lung and fork” Lois: Why? Peter: Times a factor lois. Doctor: Well Rudolph, we finally now what makes your nose red. Rudolph:Is it Pixie dust? Or Leprechaun tails? D:No, its a tumor. R:You mean, like a megical christmas tumor? D:No, a malignant tumor. The base of which is logged directly in your brain. R:Oh…like a happy speci– D: Your going to die. ---
**Author:** ![Jello](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f05b48/32.png) [@Jello](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jello)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2003, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091/70 "2003-07-19T04:11:30Z")
Stewie: Don’t you dare or I’ll do to you what I did to the Beatles! _FLASHBACK_ Stewie: John, I’d like you to meet Yoko; Yoko, John. … Peter’s pondering something, and he strokes his chin. Suddenly he grabs it, mutters, “What? How’d these get up here?” and puts his “chin” in his pants. ---
**Author:** ![Ms2001](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ms2001/32/18463_2.png) [@Ms2001](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms2001)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2003, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091/71 "2003-07-19T05:07:55Z")
Quagmire: Hey, honey! Why don’t you turn around and show me the lower East Side! Woman: Sure! (…in a gruff, manly voice.) Quagmire: Whoa! Transvestite! Back off! Wait a sec, pre-op or post-op? Woman: Pre-op. Quagmire: Whoa! Transvestite! Back off! Diane: And now, back to Action News Five. Our top story tonight: when toys attack. Quite a situation we’ve got here, Tom. Tom: Quite a situation we’ve got here Tom indeed, Diane. And the chumba-wumba song from “Wasted Talent”: Life can be hard when you’re stuck in a chair Finding it hard to go up and down stairs What do you think of the one you call God? Isn’t his absence slight…ly…odd? Maybe he’s forgotten you! ---
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2003, 5:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091/72 "2003-07-19T05:45:04Z")
In “Lethal Weapons”, I love what Peter says to the New Yorker Peter: Is your refriderator running? Because if it is, I bet it runs like you…very homosexually. another one Peter: That’s my seat, and I had sex with your mother. New Yorker: What did you say? Peter: What? About the seat or me plowing your father’s wife. When Stewie was born, they found a map of Europe and bombing sites were labled. ---
**Author:** ![Kamino\_Neko](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kamino_neko/32/34_2.png) [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2003, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091/73 "2003-07-19T05:48:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Incubus \* > \*\*Peter: "Well, see my family’s Catholic… > > Bookstore Clerk: "Ah, well then you’ll want _You’re a naughty boy, and that’s concentrated **evil** coming out of you_ " \*\* Which reminds me of another favourite. Chris: ‘God is watching me go number 2? Great, now I’m a sinner. And God’s a pervert.’ (10 points to anyone who fills in the setup. ^\_\_~) ---
**Author:** ![LWL](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f4b2a3/32.png) [@LWL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LWL)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2003, 6:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091/74 "2003-07-19T06:48:33Z")
“Let’s Go to the Hop” was already mentioned, but I have to say I have a soft spot for that episode. Besides the bondage gear scene, I also liked: – Subtitles in Korean! – “How many licks does it take to get to the center of Quohog State Prison? JUST ONE.” – The heartwarming ending where Meg shows her true feelings for that dorky A/V kid. 🙂 – And my favorite part, the song and dance number. “Your life will hit the skids, and your kids will be born without eyelids.” (Incidentally, does anyone know what song, if any, that bit was parodying?) ---
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2003, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091/75 "2003-07-19T07:01:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Tengu \* > \*\*Which reminds me of another favourite. > > Chris: ‘God is watching me go number 2? Great, now I’m a sinner. And God’s a pervert.’ > > (10 points to anyone who fills in the setup. ^\_\_~) \*\* Grandfather:I know what you’re doing in there. And, it’s a sin. if you ever do it again, you’ll burn in hell. Chris: But I do it every day. Sometimes twice. Grandfather:Mark my words lad, you may think you’re alone in there, but God’s watching! Don’t do it again! Chris:God’s watching me go number two? Oh man, I’m a sinner. And God’s a pervert. Ten poins for me. ---
**Author:** ![herwono](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/9f8e36/32.png) [@herwono](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/herwono)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2003, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091/76 "2003-07-19T14:50:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Teelo \* > **What episode was this one?** DaBoom Some more favourites: Peter: Jeez, Lois, what are ya doing lying on the couch at this hour? Have you been drinking? Lois: Peter, you know I never drink. Peter: Oh, yeah? Just like you never dodge the draft? Lois: What are you talking about? I’m a woman! Peter: Sure you are… now… * * * Brian: Peter, this is the final plague! Peter: Good, 'cause this is starting to get really old. Brian: Peter, the final plague is the death of the first-born son. Peter: Oh no, Stewie! Brian: The first born son. Peter: Meg! Brian: Your wife. Peter: Chris! ---
**Author:** ![HideoHo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3ec8ea/32.png) [@HideoHo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HideoHo)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2003, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091/77 "2003-07-19T17:50:47Z")
I almost died during the scene when Lois returns home to find that Peter has turned the livingroom into Pee Wee’s Playhouse. ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2003, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091/78 "2003-07-19T18:19:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jello \* > **Stewie: Don’t you dare or I’ll do to you what I did to the Beatles!** Actually, John Lennon. The joke is that at first, you think Stewie’s the one that shot him. The joke is he’s the one who introduced him to Yoko Ono. ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Straight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dec6dc/32.png) [@Enola\_Straight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Straight)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2003, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091/79 "2003-07-19T18:43:13Z")
Peter gets pulled over by a cop, and Peter says something like “hold on, I’ll fix this.” Cop comes to window and says “Licensce and regis…!” Peter has his shirt pulled up, exposing a big ol’ man-boob nipple. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2003, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091/80 "2003-07-19T19:31:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Enola Straight \* > \*\*Peter gets pulled over by a cop, and Peter says something like “hold on, I’ll fix this.” > > Cop comes to window and says “Licensce and regis…!” > > Peter has his shirt pulled up, exposing a big ol’ man-boob nipple. \*\* …and, when the cop doesn’t react, Peter says something like, “Great. I get the only straight cop in Connecticut.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-scenes-in-family-guy/189091.md?page=5)