# Favorite Simpson's Lyrics. . . **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 17, 2006, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115 "2006-05-17T15:54:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2006, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115/21 "2006-05-17T19:22:25Z")
_Gonna paint this wagon Gonna paint it fine Gonna use oil-based paint Because the wood is pine_ ---
**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2006, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115/22 "2006-05-17T19:47:01Z")
> [@cactus waltz](#): > > You don’t \*make \*friends with salad! Nope, **Trunk** had it right the first time. Oh Mandy, you came and you gave without taking But I sense you’ve been gay, oh Andy… Lisa: By your singing it would appear you’re infatuated with a woman named Mandy…or a man named Andy. :dubious: And from the same episode: Oh Margie, you came and you gave me a turkey On my vacation away, from workey. ---
**Author:** ![some\_white\_dude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b487fb/32.png) [@some\_white\_dude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/some_white_dude)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2006, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115/23 "2006-05-17T19:48:46Z")
> [@cactus waltz](#): > > You don’t \*make \*friends with salad! No, I think Trunk had it right. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2006, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115/24 "2006-05-17T19:49:55Z")
> [@bouv](#): > > Oh Mandy, you came and you gave without taking > But I sense you’ve been gay, oh Andy… I thought it was “I sent you Ben Gay.” ---
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2006, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115/25 "2006-05-17T20:11:07Z")
\*There’s a swingin’ town I know called… Capital City. People stop and scream hello in… Capital City. It’s the kind of place that makes a bum feel like a king. And it makes a king feel like some nutty, cuckoo, super-king. It’s against the law to frown in… Capital City. You’ll caper like a stupid clown when you chance to see… Fourth Street and ‘D’! Yeah! Once you get a whiff of it, you’ll never want to roam. Capital City, my home sweet, yeah! Capital City, that happy-tal city, It’s Capital City, my home sweet swingin’ home! \* I love the line about “some nutty, cuckoo, super-king” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2006, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115/26 "2006-05-17T20:12:28Z")
Homer discovers the (temporary) benefits of challenging people to duels in “E-I-E-I-(Annoyed Grunt).” From Wikipedia: \*The B-52’s: (to the tune of “Love Shack”) A glove slap in a little old face will get you satisfaction. (Homer slaps a toll booth attendant, who lets him pass) Glove slap ba-a-beee… (Glove slap, baby) (Homer slaps Kirk Van Houten at the golf course, and he lets Homer play) Glove slap, baby, glove slap! (threatens Dr. Hibbert as he prepares to give an injection. Hibbert injects himself and gives Homer a lollipop before falling over) Glove slap, I don’t take crap! Glove slap, shut your big yap… \* ---
**Author:** ![meow\_meow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f04885/32.png) [@meow\_meow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/meow_meow)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2006, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115/27 "2006-05-17T20:14:11Z")
[to the tune of “Here Comes Santa Claus”] Here come sandwiches, Here come sandwiches, Right down Boozey-Bum Lane, Brother Ned’s got cheese on bread and a Side order of shame ---
**Author:** ![cactus\_waltz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@cactus\_waltz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cactus_waltz)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2006, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115/28 "2006-05-17T20:15:44Z")
> [@Team of Scientists](#): > > No, I think Trunk had it right. I’ve seen the episode plenty of times and I’ve always heard it as make, even in my head. But it’s possible that I mistakingly heard it as make and just wouldn’t ‘accept’ the true lyrics the following times after that. Thankfully, it seems I’m not alone in this controversy: > **[You Don't Win Friends With Salad](https://casadelogo.typepad.com/factesque/2004/06/you_dont_win_fr.html)** > > If you get to see McCartney's new tour, bring some burgers for the crew: Crew on the singer's concert tour are angry because the staunch vegetarian has banned the eating of meat. "It's completely crazy," said one worker in Oslo,... ---
**Author:** ![jsc1953](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jsc1953](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jsc1953)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2006, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115/29 "2006-05-17T20:17:07Z")
> [@bouv](#): > > Oh Margie, you came and you gave me a turkey > On my vacation away, from workey. Dangit…I wanted to be first. Whenever I hear the Barry Manilow version I sing these lines. ---
**Author:** ![NOTAR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/8c91f0/32.png) [@NOTAR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NOTAR)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2006, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115/30 "2006-05-17T20:58:28Z")
Professor Frink, Professor Frink He’ll make you laugh. He’ll make you think… That monkey’s going to pay… ---
**Author:** ![jsc1953](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jsc1953](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jsc1953)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2006, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115/31 "2006-05-17T21:07:08Z")
They love, and share, Love and love and share Love love love Share share share ---
**Author:** ![zev\_steinhardt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/97f17d/32.png) [@zev\_steinhardt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zev_steinhardt)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2006, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115/32 "2006-05-17T21:18:05Z")
- I’m an amendment to be Yes an amendment to be And I’m hoping that they ratify me There’s a lot of flag burners Who have got too much freedom I wanna make it legal for policemen To beat 'em 'cause there’s limits to our liberty At least I hope and pray that there are 'Cause those liberal freaks go too far Boy: But why can’t we just make a law against flag burning? Amendment: Because that law would be unconstitutional But if we CHANGED the Constitution… Boy: Then we could make all sorts of crazy laws! Amendment: Now you’re catching on! - Bart: What the hell is this? Lisa: It’s one of those campy 70s throwbacks that appeal to Generation X-ers Bart: We need another Vietnam. Thin out their ranks a little. - Boy: But what if people say you’re not good enough to be in the Constitution? Amendment: Then I"ll crush all opposition to me And I’ll make Ted Kennedy pay If he fights back I’ll say that he’s gay Congressman: Good news, Amendment! They ratified you. You’re in the U.S. Constitution! Amendment: Oh yeah! Door’s open, boys! \* Zev Steinhardt ---
**Author:** ![Jebus\_H.Christ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Jebus\_H.Christ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jebus_H.Christ)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2006, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115/33 "2006-05-17T21:21:16Z")
More of chant. Two, Four, Six, Eight, Homer’s crimes were very great. Great meaning large or immense, we use it in the pejorative sense. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2006, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115/34 "2006-05-17T21:29:56Z")
What pushes the “Amendment to Be” song into sheer, stratospheric brilliance is that they actually got Jack Sheldon to sing it. ---
**Author:** ![Zetetic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/74df32/32.png) [@Zetetic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zetetic)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2006, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115/35 "2006-05-17T22:06:19Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > Maison Derriere girls: We’re the highlights in your hairdo! > Apu: The extra arms on Vishnu! > [And if I remember right, he pops up out of nowhere for that line, holding a statue of Vishnu.] and more of this… Mayor Quimby (& possibly others): “We remember our first visit, the service was exquisite!” Mrs Quimby: “Well Joseph, I had no idea!” Quimby: “Come on now, you were working here!” Grampa & Jasper: “Without it we’d have had no fun, since spring of 1951” Bart: “To shut them down now would be twisted” Jimbo, Dolph, Kearney: “We just heard this place ex-is-tedddddd” ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2006, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115/36 "2006-05-17T23:04:05Z")
Archive of Simpsons song lyrics: [http://www.snpp.com/guides/lyrics\_list.html](http://www.snpp.com/guides/lyrics_list.html) You can actually buy a couple of Simpsons soundtrack albums. [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Songs\_in\_the\_Key\_of\_Springfield](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Songs_in_the_Key_of_Springfield) ---
**Author:** ![Only\_Mostly\_Dead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/f19dbf/32.png) [@Only\_Mostly\_Dead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Only_Mostly_Dead)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2006, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115/37 "2006-05-17T23:29:54Z")
\*Dancin’ away my hunger pains Movin’ my feet so my stomach doesn’t hurt I’m kinda like Jesus but not in a sacreligious way…\* ---
**Author:** ![Omniscient](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omniscient/32/3290_2.png) [@Omniscient](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omniscient)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115/38 "2006-05-18T00:28:34Z")
\*Well Mr. Burns had done it, The power plant had won it, With Roger Clemens clucking all the while, Mike Scioscia’s tragic illness made us smile, While Wade Boggs lay unconscious on the barroom tile… We’re talkin’ softball… From Maine to San Diego. Talkin’ softball… Mattingly and Canseco. Ken Griffey’s grotesquely swollen jaw. Steve Sax and his run-in with the law. We’re talkin’ Homer… Ozzie and the Straw. We’re talkin’ softball… From Maine to San Diego. Talkin’ softball… Mattingly and Canseco. Ken Griffey’s grotesquely swollen jaw. Steve Sax and his run-in with the law. We’re talkin’ Homer… Ozzie and the Straw.\* Quite simply one of my favorite songs of all time. I have it on my I-pod as we speak. The Stonecutters song does give me the giddies too. ---
**Author:** ![Fionn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Fionn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fionn)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115/39 "2006-05-18T00:38:34Z")
“Cleaning my gun with the safety off…” ---
**Author:** ![GIGObuster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gigobuster/32/421_2.png) [@GIGObuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GIGObuster)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115/40 "2006-05-18T00:47:41Z")
_Dough_… the $tuff that buys me beer, _Ray_… the guy who sells me beer, _Me_… the guy who drinks the beer, _Fa®_… the distance to my beer, _So_… I think I’ll have a beer, _La_… la la la la la beer, _Tea_… no thanks I’m drinking beer! That will bring us back to … [looks at empty glass] \*d’oh! \* [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-simpsons-lyrics/357115.md?page=3)