# Favorite Star Trek quotes **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 25, 2005, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946 "2005-04-25T01:42:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![BrotherCadfael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@BrotherCadfael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrotherCadfael)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2005, 12:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946/81 "2005-04-26T12:18:14Z")
> [@jsc1953](#): > > Not a trekkie, and haven’t even such much Trek since TOS, but I’m enjoying this thread. > > One quote that’s stuck in my head for 35 years: the TOS episode with the reincarnated/eternal Jack the Ripper, as he’s being restrained & captured: > > “No! Die! Make you suffer…!” > > Don’t ask me why. This is an especially enjoyable episode if you close your eyes and visualize Piglet speaking all of Hengist’s lines. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2005, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946/82 "2005-04-26T13:39:56Z")
Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home seems to have most of the best lines I can remember from the ST movies. A few that haven’t been mentioned yet: Chekov, to a cop in present-day San Francisco: “Excuse me, I’m looking for the nuclear wessels.” Scotty sits in front of a 1980s PC and says, “Computer.” Nothing happens. Someone points to the mouse and says “No, you use that”. Scotty picks up the mouse and speaks into it. Spock to Kirk, after they’ve been thrown off a bus: “What does it mean, ‘Exact change’?” ---
**Author:** ![jsc1953](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jsc1953](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jsc1953)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2005, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946/83 "2005-04-26T15:03:36Z")
> [@BrotherCadfael](#): > > This is an especially enjoyable episode if you close your eyes and visualize Piglet speaking all of Hengist’s lines. Do controlled substances help you do that? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![BrotherCadfael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@BrotherCadfael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrotherCadfael)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2005, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946/84 "2005-04-26T15:40:44Z")
> [@jsc1953](#): > > > [@jsc1953](#): > > > > Not a trekkie, and haven’t even such much Trek since TOS, but I’m enjoying this thread. > > > > One quote that’s stuck in my head for 35 years: the TOS episode with the reincarnated/eternal Jack the Ripper, as he’s being restrained & captured: > > > > “No! Die! Make you suffer…!” > > > > Don’t ask me why. > > > > > [@BrotherCadfael](#): > > > > > > This is an especially enjoyable episode if you close your eyes and visualize Piglet speaking all of Hengist’s lines. > > Do controlled substances help you do that? 🙂 John Fiedler (Mr. Hengist) was the voice of Piglet in many of the Winnie-the-Pooh movies. I hate having to explain my jokes. ---
**Author:** ![jsc1953](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jsc1953](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jsc1953)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2005, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946/85 "2005-04-26T15:47:29Z")
Really? I thought Piglet was Stanley Holloway (hence, the whoosh). I’m off to the IMDB… ---
**Author:** ![Malodorous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e47774/32.png) [@Malodorous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malodorous)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2005, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946/86 "2005-04-26T16:46:59Z")
> [@El\_Kabong](#): > > Scotty sits in front of a 1980s PC and says, “Computer.” Nothing happens. Someone points to the mouse and says “No, you use that”. Scotty picks up the mouse and speaks into it When I was a computer tech, picking up the mouse and saying “Hello Computer” in my best Scotty accent was deffinately my most used Star Trek quote. ---
**Author:** ![mrklutz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ebca7d/32.png) [@mrklutz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mrklutz)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2005, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946/87 "2005-04-26T16:47:47Z")
Kirk’s all-time best line: “No more bonk bonk!” (from _Miri_) I must agree that Worf gets the absolute best comic moments. My favorite is in the Robin Hood episode when he reaches over, grabs Geordi’s lute, smashes it against a tree, hands the fragments back, and deadpans… “Sorry.” ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2005, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946/88 "2005-04-26T17:25:16Z")
_City on the Edge of Forever_. Kirk has just stopped McCoy from rescuing Edith Keeler, and she’s struck by a car and dies. Bones is furious, asking, “Do you know what you’ve done!” Spock: “He knows, Doctor. He knows.” ---
**Author:** ![blowero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/41988e/32.png) [@blowero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blowero)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2005, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946/89 "2005-04-26T19:49:24Z")
Bones: “Shouldn’t you be working on your time warp calculations?” Spock: (just standing there) “I _am_.” > [@BrotherCadfael](#): > > John Fiedler (Mr. Hengist) was the voice of Piglet in many of the Winnie-the-Pooh movies. I always think of Mr. Peterson from The Bob Newhart Show. ---
**Author:** ![gonzoron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a6a055/32.png) [@gonzoron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gonzoron)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2005, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946/90 "2005-04-26T20:16:30Z")
> [@Sauron](#): > > Two from “Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country”: TUC has some of my absolute favorites: Spock: “Logic, Logic, Logic. Logic is the beginning of wisdom, Valeris, not the end.” Kirk: “How on earth can history get past people like me?” Spock: Mr. Scott, I understand you are experiencing difficulties with the warp drive? Scotty: There’s nothing wrong with the bloody… Spock: Mr. Scott, if the Enterprise responds to hails and returns to Starbase, there is a good chance that we will never see Captain Kirk or Doctor McCoy alive again. Scotty: Could take weeks, sir… ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2005, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946/91 "2005-04-26T21:18:32Z")
From “The Immunity Syndrome” “Spock! You’re alive!” “Obviously.” (We omit here the too-often-quoted moment from “The Naked Now” in which Data is interrupted in his recitation of a limerick he does not understand.) From “Generations”: Geordi: “Data! That’s not funny” (patently lying, as the entire movie theatre is in stitches). ---
**Author:** ![gotpasswords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c57346/32.png) [@gotpasswords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gotpasswords)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2005, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946/92 "2005-04-26T23:52:24Z")
“_Keyboard_! How quaint!” (The rest of Scot’s “Hello computer!” at Plasticorp) Another Scot-ism from _ST III_: “The more they overthink the plumbing, the easier it is to stop up the drain.” I use that one just about every time I encounter a nyetwork. (Computer says “Nyet! I can’t find the printer!”) Data had a couple in _Generations_: Scanning a planet for life: “Life forms! You tiny little life forms! You precious little life forms! Where are you?” As the ship is hurtling out of control to the planet surface: “Oh shit” Just totally out of his normal behavior. From a TNG episode, when tending bar, he’s asked about a particular beverage: “It is green” ---
**Author:** ![rjung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/45deac/32.png) [@rjung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjung)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2005, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946/93 "2005-04-27T00:25:53Z")
> [@gotpasswordsFrom a TNG episode](#): > > 's asked about a particular beverage: “It is green” Isn’t that from the episode where the TNG crew found Montgomery Scott’s pattern in the transporter, from within the Dyson Sphere or something? IIRC, the line was supposed to be homage to his identical line from one of the TOS episodes… ---
**Author:** ![jimpatro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b9e5f3/32.png) [@jimpatro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jimpatro)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2005, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946/94 "2005-04-27T00:58:34Z")
From **Miri**. Punk kids chant “Bla, bla, bla. Bla, bla, bla.” Kirk replies " No blah, blah!" in that special Shatner kind of way. ---
**Author:** ![Peter\_Morris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peter_morris/32/359_2.png) [@Peter\_Morris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peter_Morris)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2005, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946/95 "2005-04-27T01:06:31Z")
Data: How is your diplomatic assignment progressing ? Worf: Fine. Data: I have heard that in moments of diplomatic tension it is often helpful to find elements of commonality. Worf: Mister Byleth is demanding, temperamental and rude. Data: You share all of those qualities in abundance. Perhaps you should build on your similarities ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2005, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946/96 "2005-04-27T01:20:27Z")
Spock: “I’ve been dead before.” ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2005, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946/97 "2005-04-27T02:40:00Z")
Data, smiling, to an arguing bunch of dweebs (a line I’ve been able to use here from time to time): “Please continue the petty bickering.” ---
**Author:** ![kingpengvin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9dc877/32.png) [@kingpengvin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kingpengvin)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2005, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946/98 "2005-04-27T03:33:36Z")
oooo ooo I though of some more: From \*\*The Changeling \*\* when Kirk has logiked Nomad into a self destruction SPOCK: “Captain your logic was impeccable, we are in great danger!” From **The Deadly Years** Senile Kirk: “Go on ask me anything… ask me. We are in orbit around gamma hydra II” (Several times he has been reminded that they are orbiting Gamma Hydra IV, it is a subtle slip up that works) Kirk upon being told he will be executed on Roman TV: The Proconsul: Of course you are well beyond anything as primative as Television Kirk:I’ve heard it was… similar From the same episode McCoy’s berating of Spock: McCoy: Do you know why you’re not afraid to die, Spock? You’re more afraid of living. Each day you stay alive is just one more day you might slip and let your human half peek out. That’s it, isn’t it? Insecurity. Why, you wouldn’t know what to do with a genuine, warm, decent feeling. (long pause) Spock: Really, Doctor. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2005, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946/99 "2005-04-27T03:46:07Z")
Cold it was… Like a stinking draught from out of a slaughterhouse. ---
**Author:** ![torie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/77aa72/32.png) [@torie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/torie)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2005, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946/100 "2005-04-27T04:12:58Z")
> [@Art Vandelay](#): > > Data (paraphrasing): Ensign (whatever her name was) just gave me, what you might call “a…passionate kiss in the torpedo bay.” > Best. Double entendre. EVER!!! “In Theory” is the name of the episode. 🙂 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-star-trek-quotes/300946.md?page=6)