# Favorite way to say "He/she's kinda slow or not all there"? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 17, 2008, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817 "2008-07-17T12:49:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Lucky\_13](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lucky_13/32/13209_2.png) [@Lucky\_13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucky_13)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2008, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817/101 "2008-07-18T04:39:22Z")
My favorite is a quote from a child, which I read on this board: > [@](#): > > You ate stupid food for breakfast. ---
**Author:** ![missred](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/missred/32/14096_2.png) [@missred](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/missred)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2008, 6:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817/102 "2008-07-18T06:10:04Z")
One from my dad: “I believe he’s got one light out in the ol’ marquee.” Ones that I tend to use: dumb as a brick and drivin’the short bus. ---
**Author:** ![katpohl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b782af/32.png) [@katpohl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/katpohl)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2008, 7:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817/103 "2008-07-18T07:11:07Z")
The only thing he / she uses their head for is a hat rack. ---
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2008, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817/104 "2008-07-18T16:33:57Z")
That boy’s got about a 15 watt bulb. ---
**Author:** ![This\_ll\_Do](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/this_ll_do/32/3023_2.png) [@This\_ll\_Do](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/This_ll_Do)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2008, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817/105 "2008-07-18T21:45:12Z")
Off-key in the upper registers. Wears a ponytail/cap to hide the valve stem. Batteries not included. Sharp, like stone in river. Swift, like tree through forest The gene pool could use a little chlorine. If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean. A favorite from my paramedic days: Sucking head wound ---
**Author:** ![Kevbo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e47774/32.png) [@Kevbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kevbo)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2008, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817/106 "2008-07-19T02:11:03Z")
You’ve got a point…but keep your hat on and most folks won’t notice. Two tacos short of a combination plate. Somebody please blow in her ear and give her a refill. That guy is living proof you don’t have to be female to be a bimbo. Lays his shingles nice and straight, but always starts at the top. Donna: See Bob, I’m not as dumb as I look! Bob: \ You couldn’t be. ---
**Author:** ![Helena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c68b51/32.png) [@Helena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helena)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2008, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817/107 "2008-07-19T02:36:40Z")
Daft as a two-bob watch. ---
**Author:** ![Full\_Metal\_Lotus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/df705f/32.png) [@Full\_Metal\_Lotus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Full_Metal_Lotus)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2008, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817/108 "2008-07-19T05:18:35Z")
Smarter than a tall building IQ matches shoe size/bust line/age to be used while waving hand in front of face… “whew! Didja smell that brain fart?!” Dances with stupid Sorry, my dumbometer doesn’t go that low Striking a burnt match FML… ---
**Author:** ![phil417](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/6bbea6/32.png) [@phil417](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phil417)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2008, 6:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817/109 "2008-07-19T06:46:28Z")
A favorite from my southern Grandma: “His momma loves him & that’s good enough for me.” (usually followed by that favorite, “bless his lil heart.”) Love, Phil ---
**Author:** ![TheLoadedDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/35a633/32.png) [@TheLoadedDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheLoadedDog)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2008, 6:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817/110 "2008-07-19T06:52:40Z")
All my favourite Foghorn Leghorn type ones have been taken, so I’ll add one I like for when a person is not dumb, but rather a little odd or eccentric: _“The dollar’s all there, but it’s all in loose change.”_ ---
**Author:** ![Capt.Ridley\_s\_Shooting\_Party](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/cc9497/32.png) [@Capt.Ridley\_s\_Shooting\_Party](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Capt.Ridley_s_Shooting_Party)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2008, 8:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817/111 "2008-07-19T08:40:26Z")
Penny short of a pound. Not the full shilling. Numb as a pit-prop. ---
**Author:** ![Moriarty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moriarty/32/49_2.png) [@Moriarty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moriarty)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2008, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817/112 "2008-07-19T14:52:04Z")
He’s so dumb, it takes him and hour and a half to watch _60 Minutes_ (or, it takes him half an hour to cook minute rice). He’s nuttier than squirrel shit. ---
**Author:** ![Ms.Information](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c57346/32.png) [@Ms.Information](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms.Information)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2008, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817/113 "2008-07-19T15:03:14Z")
“His antenna doesn’t pick up too many stations!” (from an old radio broadcaster…) 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Aithele](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b38774/32.png) [@Aithele](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aithele)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2008, 10:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817/114 "2008-07-20T10:28:25Z")
One day he’s going to make a great Darwin award. He thinks he’s a real wit. He’s half right. He’s a little too tall for his blood supply. The oven’s on but nothing’s cooking. He has an intellect rivaled only by garden tools. He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle. ---
**Author:** ![Nawth\_Chucka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c57346/32.png) [@Nawth\_Chucka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nawth_Chucka)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2008, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817/115 "2008-07-20T12:44:09Z")
Not the brightest candle in the menorah. ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2008, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817/116 "2008-07-20T16:39:34Z")
[QUOTE=Malacandra] Couldn’t get a clue if he rubbed himself all over with clue musk and did the clue mating call naked in a field of horny clues in clue breeding season. [/QUOTE] Couldn’t get a clue if it was clue mating season, he was in a clue singles bar full of horny drunk clues, rubbed clue musk all over himself and did the clue mating dance. he still couldn’t get a clue. **Cluricaun** I had always heard that as driving a piss ant’s go cart around a B-B, but I like yours better. A couple of automotive ones: I think he goes lean at high revs. That boy just can’t get into turbo boost. ---
**Author:** ![LurkMeister](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@LurkMeister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkMeister)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2008, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817/117 "2008-07-20T18:13:07Z")
When they were passing out brains he thought they said trains, and asked for a slow one. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2008, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817/118 "2008-07-20T19:16:49Z")
[QUOTE=tdn] Actually, it’s “a boy that’s never played baseball.” _Shakes head. That boy’s as thick as a whale sandwich._ [/QUOTE] “I say, the boy’s so dumb, he thinks the Mexican border pays rent!” ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2008, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817/119 "2008-07-20T19:21:35Z")
[QUOTE=robardin] Fifty responses in and nobody’s mentioned “couldn’t find his own ass with both hands (…and a mirror) (…and a road map) (…and a flashlight)” yet? All right! [/QUOTE] Also: He couldn’t find his ass with a ten-man search party. ---
**Author:** ![Jammer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df705f/32.png) [@Jammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jammer)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2008, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817/120 "2008-07-21T00:53:18Z")
For all my computer geek brothers and sisters… He’s two bits short of a three. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favorite-way-to-say-he-shes-kinda-slow-or-not-all-there/456817.md?page=7)