# Favourite "Archer" lines **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 13, 2011, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347 "2011-06-13T19:26:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Sam\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Sam\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Stone)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2011, 6:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347/81 "2011-07-12T06:52:31Z")
“We touched penises.” ---
**Author:** ![hogarth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hogarth/32/1773_2.png) [@hogarth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hogarth)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2011, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347/82 "2011-07-12T15:40:22Z")
> [@Sam\_Stone](#): > > “We touched penises.” “Where?” ---
**Author:** ![DigitalC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ebca7d/32.png) [@DigitalC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DigitalC)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2011, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347/83 "2011-07-12T16:10:41Z")
> [@RandMcnally](#): > > I had to stop it a couple of times because I was laughing so hard. I’d put money on one of those times being the “just the tip” montage. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2011, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347/84 "2011-07-12T16:40:22Z")
“Sesame Ginger Savings & Loan?” “I happen to be a kickass accountant!” “Did that sound a lot better in your head?” “…Yes, it did.” “Shoot him, Cyril - but just him; I think the twins are warming up to me.” “Look at you: Shoulders like a trout.” ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Sam\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Stone)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2011, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347/85 "2011-07-12T16:54:25Z")
> [@hogarth](#): > > “Where?” All of it. Head and shaft! ---
**Author:** ![beartato](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/9d8465/32.png) [@beartato](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beartato)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2011, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347/86 "2011-07-12T17:04:22Z")
I have to say I was pretty shocked when I found out the cast all records separately. I know it’s pretty standard for most animated shows these days but the interactions between characters - especially the AD alumni - are so flawlessly timed with perfect tone. ---
**Author:** ![LawMonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@LawMonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LawMonkey)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2011, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347/87 "2011-07-14T16:30:09Z")
> [@Sam\_Stone](#): > > All of it. Head and shaft! _bwip!_ "Sir, that stolen lemur just bit one of your prostitutes right on the face, and she says she can’t go to hospital because she’s, quote, “tripping balls.” “The secret ingredient is _phone_.” “Thanks, I’ll let you know if I need a hybrid pig boy!” “What?! I don’t know what-- I don’t have one of those–” “…that’ll do, Pigly, that’ll do.” “…anymore!” ---
**Author:** ![LawMonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@LawMonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LawMonkey)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2011, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347/88 "2011-07-14T16:51:09Z")
“Duh and/or hello!” ---
**Author:** ![HoboStew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/f17d59/32.png) [@HoboStew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HoboStew)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2011, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347/89 "2011-07-14T16:59:24Z")
“That was the last of my stash. It’s gonna be an itchy weekend…” ---
**Author:** ![LawMonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@LawMonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LawMonkey)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347/90 "2011-07-15T19:49:34Z")
“What? You’re black…ish.” “Ish?!” “Well, what’s the word for it, Lana?! You freaked out when I said ‘quadroon!’” “Imagine that!” A few months back I went to a pub trivia night with a friend. I swear we said “quadroon” for no particular reason fifty times over the course of the evening. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347/91 "2011-07-15T21:09:47Z")
> [@lost4life](#): > > I do hope all **Arrested Development** fans know who voices the heads of ISIS and ODIN! Also Cheryl / Carol / Carina / Cristal Pam: The identity of every single ISIS field agent is on there! Archer: So what? Malory: Because most secret agents don’t tell every harlot from here to Hanoi that they ARE secret agents. Archer: Then why be one? ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2011, 9:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347/92 "2011-07-16T09:40:41Z")
[reading from the newspaper]“Sir Augustus Stilton, World War one flying ace, blah blah blah, dies under mysterious circumstances.” Heh, mystery solved - he was a thousand! ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2011, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347/93 "2011-07-16T21:52:56Z")
Cheryl is screaming during a gun battle. Archer: SHUT UP! [Your] vest is bulletproof! Cheryl: Oh. [gets shot in the upper arm] OW! Archer: But it is, y’know, a vest. ---
**Author:** ![Ike\_Witt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ike_witt/32/283_2.png) [@Ike\_Witt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ike_Witt)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2011, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347/94 "2011-07-17T01:38:45Z")
I never thought I’d say this, but I really miss the Zima. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2011, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347/95 "2011-07-17T15:37:27Z")
Seriously, that’s like, Eggs 101 ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2013, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347/96 "2013-01-05T20:15:53Z")
In honor of the upcoming fourth season… “I’ll have you know my vulva is as smooth as a veal cutlet… with a terrible sense of timing.” “It’s crepuscular! Get it!” “Ew. It tastes worse than it smells.” “If I had a dime for every time a man’s said that to me… I’d have eighty cents!” “Danger Zone!” “I vote ‘Asian chick.’” ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2013, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347/97 "2013-01-05T20:24:45Z")
That’s “M” as in “Mancy”… ---
**Author:** ![standingwave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9de0a6/32.png) [@standingwave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/standingwave)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2013, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347/98 "2013-01-05T21:43:48Z")
Malory: _You’re damn lucky Anka convinced her father not to press charges._ Archer: \*Yeah, I feel lucky. Let’s see, sexually assaulted by a teen-aged sociopath, interrogated by gendarmes, oh, three stitches in my penis, so, yep, it’s all breaking my way. \* ---
**Author:** ![Ian\_D.Bergkamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Ian\_D.Bergkamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ian_D.Bergkamp)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2013, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347/99 "2013-01-05T22:37:14Z")
“A black astronaut, Cyril! That’s like killing a unicorn!” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2013, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-archer-lines/585347/100 "2013-01-06T04:19:52Z")
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