# Favourite Benny Hill Jokes **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 4, 2006, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-benny-hill-jokes/367395 "2006-08-04T22:25:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 6\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2019, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-benny-hill-jokes/367395/101 "2019-04-18T15:00:43Z")
> [@koeeoaddi](#): > > Another ‘I can’t stand Benny Hill, but I loved this bit’ post. > > **They Thought It Couldn’t Be Done** > > [Just Benny at a podium reciting a long glurgy inspirational poem ending with…] > > _They thought that it could not be done, > Some even said they knew it, > But he faced up to what could not be done…_ > > _And he couldn’t bloody do it!_ I realize that I’m writing in response to a zombie, but it needs to be pointed out that: 1.) Richard Haydn did it earlier, playing poet Edwin Carp in the episode “The Return of Edwin Carp” on _The Dick van Dyke Show_ first broadcast April 1, 1964 (April Fool’s Day, appropriately). He called the poem “Perseverance”, and I lacked the “bloody” in the last line. > [@](#): > > “Perseverance” > > Somebody said it couldn’t be done, > But he with a chuckle replied, > “Maybe it couldn’t, but I will be one, > Who’ll never say ‘No!’ 'til I’ve tried.” > > So he buckled right in, > With a trace of a grin > On his face, if he worried he hid it. > And he tackled the thing that couldn’t be done, > > And he couldn’t do it. [http://inkrow.blogspot.com/2010/06/as-recited-by-edwin-carp.html](http://inkrow.blogspot.com/2010/06/as-recited-by-edwin-carp.html) > **["The Dick Van Dyke Show" The Return of Edwin Carp (TV Episode 1964) ⭐ 7.6 |...](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0559840/)** > > 30m | TV-G Both Haydn’s and Hill’s poems are parodies of the inspirational poem “It Couldn’t be Done” by Edgar Albert Guest > [@](#): > > Somebody said that it couldn’t be done > But he with a chuckle replied > That “maybe it couldn’t,” but he would be one > Who wouldn’t say so till he’d tried. > So he buckled right in with the trace of a grin > On his face. If he worried he hid it. > He started to sing as he tackled the thing > That couldn’t be done, and he did it! > > Somebody scoffed: “Oh, you’ll never do that; > At least no one ever has done it;” > But he took off his coat and he took off his hat > And the first thing we knew he’d begun it. > With a lift of his chin and a bit of a grin, > Without any doubting or quiddit, > He started to sing as he tackled the thing > That couldn’t be done, and he did it. > > There are thousands to tell you it cannot be done, > There are thousands to prophesy failure, > There are thousands to point out to you one by one, > The dangers that wait to assail you. > But just buckle in with a bit of a grin, > Just take off your coat and go to it; > Just start in to sing as you tackle the thing > That “cannot be done,” and you’ll do it. > **[It Couldn’t Be Done by Edgar Albert Guest | Poetry Foundation](https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/44314/it-couldnt-be-done)** > > Somebody said that it couldn’t be done ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2019, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-benny-hill-jokes/367395/102 "2019-04-18T18:22:52Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > Both Haydn’s and Hill’s poems are parodies of the inspirational poem “It Couldn’t be Done” by Edgar Albert Guest _ **MAD Magazine** _ did an article along these lines called “Twisted \*\*\*MAD \*\*\*Tales for Twisted \*\*\*MAD \*\*\*Readers.” Each inspirational short story featured a trope like “The Homebuilt Racer,” “The Genie in the Bottle,” and “The Gambler’s Last Quarter.” None ended the way you’d expect. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2019, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-benny-hill-jokes/367395/103 "2019-04-18T19:33:21Z")
> [@Skywatcher](#): > > [This episode list](https://benny-hill.fandom.com/wiki/Episodes) says Benny played Ironside twice. Neither segment features the bit you mention so I don’t know what you saw unless it was part of [the Grand Wheelchair Rally](https://benny-hill.fandom.com/wiki/Grand_Wheelchair_Rally). Granted, it’s been about 35 years since I saw it, so it could have been another show, or completely imaginary. ---
**Author:** ![ftg](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ftg/32/2801_2.png) [@ftg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ftg)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2019, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-benny-hill-jokes/367395/104 "2019-04-18T21:11:23Z")
Any of the bits with Diana Darvey. Of those, I remember _Beach of Waikiki_ best. They were both cracking up. The moments where he got out of his ancient music hall mode were few and far between. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2019, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-benny-hill-jokes/367395/105 "2019-04-20T04:58:23Z")
One of the more understated bits I recall was Benny as a French film director (“Claude Le Twit”) being interviewed and the host kept asking about all the artistic elements in his latest film, each of which turned out to have a banal explanation, i.e. the film suddenly shifts from color to black-and-white because, it turned out, they just ran out of color film. Some scenes are shot with a hand-held camera because… the tripod was broken. And the lead actress, otherwise perfectly beautiful and flawless, was directed to play her character with a lisp: Benny: Non, non, you misunderstand. I don’t give 'er a leesp. The actress who play the part, she have always leesp. Host: You searched all France for an actress with a lisp? Benny: Non, non, I don’t find her, she was discovered by our producer. Who was living with 'er at the time. And Jane Leeves showed up occasionally, I hear. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2019, 5:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-benny-hill-jokes/367395/106 "2019-04-20T05:31:57Z")
You know, Benny Hill is quite lowbrow. And that’s exactly why I love the show! 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/favourite-benny-hill-jokes/367395.md?page=5)