# Feeling guilty....please help me not feel so bad. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 1, 2003, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399 "2003-05-01T15:50:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399/161 "2003-05-02T15:58:07Z")
Woo hoo! ::_sending speedy recovery vibes to kitty_:: ---
**Author:** ![Deadly\_Nightlight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Deadly\_Nightlight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Deadly_Nightlight)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399/162 "2003-05-02T15:58:44Z")
Have you tried the bitter apple spray? Now it really doesn’t make a difference, but I have a neighbor that swears by it. ---
**Author:** ![Lady\_Venom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9fc348/32.png) [@Lady\_Venom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lady_Venom)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399/163 "2003-05-02T16:04:10Z")
Deadly Nightlight - We have bitter apply by the caseload because of the ferrets. Both the cat and one of my ferrets must have a taste for bitter stuff, because they LOVE it. I didn’t try it on the couch because of the discoloration factor, which it has done on carpet. Likewise for lemon juice. ---
**Author:** ![Liz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/liz/32/17737_2.png) [@Liz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liz)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399/164 "2003-05-02T16:04:12Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Eve \* > \*\ ***QueerGeekGirl** , you realize if you continue to be as reasonable, well-mannered and open to the thoughts and feelings of others as you were in your opening post, they _will_ revoke your card? \*\* So I’ve heard. I’ve taken to hiding my card in a faux-fur wallet. It’s the one thing I have they won’t touch. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![carrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de0a6/32.png) [@carrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrot)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399/165 "2003-05-02T16:05:06Z")
Good to hear it. Give her some catnip for me. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399/166 "2003-05-02T16:07:35Z")
Feh. My cats thought it was a dessert topping. ---
**Author:** ![Liz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/liz/32/17737_2.png) [@Liz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liz)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399/167 "2003-05-02T16:11:22Z")
I’m glad to know the kit is doing well. The only things I can think to warn you about is trying to refrain her from jumping as much as possible/newspaper for litter/don’t freak about a little bleeding. Also sending many good vibes and get well treats to her! ---
**Author:** ![Lady\_Venom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9fc348/32.png) [@Lady\_Venom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lady_Venom)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399/168 "2003-05-02T16:20:39Z")
We are going to keep her locked in the cat room for a few days while we’re not home. Yes, she has her own room. She’ll likely just lay on my lap when we are home. She has used Yesterday’s News before when we ran out of clumping on Easter Weekend and didn’t seem like she cared. Thanks for all the good vibes being sent her way. ---
**Author:** ![Deadly\_Nightlight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Deadly\_Nightlight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Deadly_Nightlight)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399/169 "2003-05-02T16:29:30Z")
My mom said you could also try foiling the couch arms, she said that worked on a cat that we had when I was a mini kid, because apparently cats hate foil, but that was just to keep them from jumping on them. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399/170 "2003-05-02T16:42:20Z")
Tried that, too . . . One cat pulled the foil off and batted it around the floor, while the other cat went back to happily scratching the sofa. ---
**Author:** ![Deadly\_Nightlight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Deadly\_Nightlight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Deadly_Nightlight)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399/171 "2003-05-02T16:47:11Z")
well back to the drawing board ---
**Author:** ![TVAA](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c57346/32.png) [@TVAA](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVAA)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399/172 "2003-05-02T17:07:58Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Cheesesteak \* > **Yeah, and if the cat craps in the candy dish, and pees on the pillow, I’d want an extremely similar cat without the crapping/peeing thing. People might actually want their pets to act in a manner that doesn’t destroy all of their possessions. If training fails (and it did here) then the relatively painless surgery will have to do.** I’d just love to see how these people deal with toddlers. ---
**Author:** ![istara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e79b87/32.png) [@istara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/istara)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399/173 "2003-05-02T17:28:12Z")
When a feral cat used to visit me, the first thing it did when it saw a brand new rug I bought, was scratch it. An expensive rug. But you know, I thought - well, a few scratches won’t kill it. They’ll be a reminder of the kitty once she’s gone, like a signature. And if it really bothers me, I could move the rug, or move the kitty to a different room. I could cover up the rug. Etc. I realise you’ve thought about this, and made your decision, but the only reason you started this thread is because you feel bad about it. And why do you feel bad about it? It’s because at the end of the day, you are putting your needs above those of the cat. It’s selfish. Maybe the cat will be OK in the long run, but it’s still a selfish decision. It’s not the first, or last, or certainly the worst decision anyone will ever make about a pet - there are far worse (eg tail docking). But it’s still selfish. ---
**Author:** ![porcupine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ac91a4/32.png) [@porcupine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/porcupine)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399/174 "2003-05-02T17:36:43Z")
My cats also don’t give a crap about foil - I used to lay it on top of sweaters I had to dry flat. I used to come home to foil spread around the room, that had obviously been played with, and a sweater that had obviously had a cat on it. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399/175 "2003-05-02T17:54:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by ItsNotMe \* > \*\* > Why not cut kid’s hands off, for ruining the house?!?!?! HA? > \*\* HAW HAW HAW! ---
**Author:** ![Sauron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@Sauron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sauron)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399/176 "2003-05-02T18:26:41Z")
> [@](#): > > ## _Originally posted by TVAA_ > > ## Originally posted by Cheesesteak Yeah, and if the cat craps in the candy dish, and pees on the pillow, I’d want an extremely similar cat without the crapping/peeing thing. People might actually want their pets to act in a manner that doesn’t destroy all of their possessions. If training fails (and it did here) then the relatively painless surgery will have to do. > > I’d just love to see how these people deal with toddlers. Speaking as a man who has helped raise four toddlers, and is currently working on a fifth, I can tell you unequivocally that if your toddler is consistently pooping in the candy dish and peeing on your pillow you’re doing something wrong. ---
**Author:** ![carrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de0a6/32.png) [@carrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrot)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399/177 "2003-05-02T18:29:23Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Sauron \* > \*\*Speaking as a man who has helped raise four toddlers, and is currently working on a fifth, I can tell you unequivocally that if your toddler is consistently pooping in the candy dish and peeing on your pillow you’re doing something wrong. \*\* Yeah. They’re supposed to eat the candy and throw up on the pillow. ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399/178 "2003-05-02T18:33:12Z")
Lemon juice repels cats? Can you send a copy of that memo to my cats, please? They _loooove_ lemon juice, and it would be really nice to set down a lemonade (or a hot toddy :eek: ) without them trying to guzzle it. As for the people screaming about how horrible declawing is, have you ever actually assisted in a declaw? If done properly, it’s an almost completely bloodless procedure, even with the old scalpel method (I’ve never worked for a vet that had the laser equipment.) Some cats have complications, just as some cats have complications from spays and neuters. The vast majority of them have no problems whatsoever. They get a post-op sedative that a) lowers their blood pressure a little, reducing the chance of residual bleeding even more and b) prevents them from going through the dysphoria and excitatory phase that often goes with waking up from anesthesia, they’re awake but drowsy and relaxed the night after, then they go home the next day. Hell, the guy I used to work for only rarely had to bandage the paws, as his declaws almost never bled. Well, that, and bandage removal tends to be really stressful for the cat and seems to make them more prone to fooling with their paws afterward. I don’t _like_ declawing, but at least it serves a purpose, unlike ear crops, tail docks, and dewclaw removal. (Dewclaw removal does simplify nail trims, though.) ---
**Author:** ![Lady\_Venom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9fc348/32.png) [@Lady\_Venom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lady_Venom)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399/179 "2003-05-02T18:35:00Z")
Yes, I am being selfish for wanting to give my cat a good, PERMANENT home. I want her to be happy and healthy and loved by US! She was a stray for goodness knows how long and was very skinny when we adopted her. I nursed her back to health. I gave her antibiotics when she had a very VERY nasty cold and could barely breathe from being dumped on the street by someone who obviously didn’t want her or didn’t care enough to make sure she was microchipped. Excuse the hell out of me for wanting to give my cat a home and owners who love her immensely. ---
**Author:** ![Sauron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@Sauron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sauron)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399/180 "2003-05-02T18:35:22Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by carrot \* > \*\*Yeah. They’re supposed to eat the candy and throw up on the pillow. \*\* Yes! Exactly! **TVAA** , please pay attention to **carrot** , here. It might aid you in your efforts to be less annoying. But I doubt it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/feeling-guilty-please-help-me-not-feel-so-bad/172399.md?page=10)