# Fellow lesbian dopers: could Ben Affleck "convert" you? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 9, 2003, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975 "2003-08-09T03:45:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2003, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975/41 "2003-08-12T00:28:51Z")
I often see women I would _definitely_ consider stretching the (when sober) bounds of my heterosexuality. In both women and men, I have a tendency to be attracted to the singularities of a physical appearance; the off-center nose, the crooked smile, the weird forehead scar that looks like the _Enterprise_ … and B-fleck is the complete diametric opposite of that. Blah blah bland blah blah blahdiblah blah blah. I can’t think of anything less attractive than a person with no individual traits. Even his characters are bland, because no matter _who_ he’s playing he’s still _always Ben_. No, thank you. Not even with Heath Ledger’s dick and Ewan McGregor pushing. ---
**Author:** ![Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/earl_snake-hips_tucker/32/3269_2.png) [@Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earl_Snake-Hips_Tucker)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2003, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975/42 "2003-08-12T00:48:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by LMM \* > \*\*God. I’m a straight guy, and _I’d_ break from heterosexuality if after him I could have Jodie Foster. \*\* **WORD!** ---
**Author:** ![kalex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/dfb087/32.png) [@kalex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kalex)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2003, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975/43 "2003-08-12T01:45:50Z")
Straight girl checking in…ummm, can I make him my bitch? Then, maybe. ---
**Author:** ![summerbreeze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3bc359/32.png) [@summerbreeze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/summerbreeze)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2003, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975/44 "2003-08-12T01:53:54Z")
I remember when people used to say, “She’s a lesbian because she couldn’t get a man.” As if men were picky! ---
**Author:** ![cuauhtemoc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecb155/32.png) [@cuauhtemoc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cuauhtemoc)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2003, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975/45 "2003-08-12T02:08:50Z")
Every single person who has posted to this thread, male, female, gay and straight, has basically said that he has the sex appeal of a piece of wood, yet he’s a huge, huge star. Why is that? Could it be that he’s only a star because the Hollywood publicity machine tells us he is, and not because of any quality inherent in the man’s persona itself? ---
**Author:** ![Orange\_Skinner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/3be4f8/32.png) [@Orange\_Skinner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Orange_Skinner)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2003, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975/46 "2003-08-12T02:42:08Z")
**cuauhtemoc** , that’s really not fair to the piece of wood. 🙂 Other than that, though, absolutely. The man _should not be famous_. ---
**Author:** ![jmizzou](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/edb3f5/32.png) [@jmizzou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jmizzou)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2003, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975/47 "2003-08-12T03:03:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Orange Skinner \* > \*\ ***cuauhtemoc** , that’s really not fair to the piece of wood. 🙂 > > Other than that, though, absolutely. The man _should not be famous_. \*\* Of course he shouldn’t be famous! I mean, they’re not even trying to hide his horrible acting ability anymore. Check out this upcoming Bennie movie: [Paycheck](http://us.imdb.com/Title?0338337)! What a title. I bet the plot on that one is riveting! ---
**Author:** ![summerbreeze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3bc359/32.png) [@summerbreeze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/summerbreeze)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2003, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975/48 "2003-08-13T01:19:55Z")
Saw _People_ Magazine in the grocery store today. Will the marriage take place??? Who caaaaares??? But I did study Ben’s photo, and he is a bland little thing, isn’t he? with those slitty little eyes. YUK. Remember when a no-talent female actor (we called them “actresses”) became famous & everyone wondered who she’d slept with? Why don’t we ask that about the Ben Afflecks? ---
**Author:** ![Fuji\_Kitakyusho](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f0a364/32.png) [@Fuji\_Kitakyusho](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fuji_Kitakyusho)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2003, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975/49 "2003-08-13T04:07:00Z")
I didn’t know Ben Affleck was a lesbian. Learn something new every day… ---
**Author:** ![Orange\_Skinner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/3be4f8/32.png) [@Orange\_Skinner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Orange_Skinner)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2003, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975/50 "2003-08-13T05:03:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by summerbreeze \* > \*\* > > Remember when a no-talent female actor (we called them “actresses”) became famous & everyone wondered who she’d slept with? Why don’t we ask that about the Ben Afflecks? \*\* In most cases, I’d say that holds every bit as true for no-talent male actors as females…but maybe not in Ben’s case. I mean…if this thread is any indicator, who would _want_ to do him? It’s got to be something else. Maybe Matt Damon owes him some favors from when they were younger, and _he_ sleeps with producers\* for\* Ben Affleck, thus landing him the roles. I think that might be the answer to the mystery of How Is He Famous. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2003, 10:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975/51 "2003-08-13T10:52:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by summerbreeze \* > \*\*I remember when people used to say, “She’s a lesbian because she couldn’t get a man.” > > As if men were picky! \*\* I don’t know. I’ve seen some dykes who wouldn’t get a man if he was wearing eighty-proof beer goggles, and who presumably could only get a woman because it was part of rad-fem-les-sep political principle. :rolleyes: One good broad-brushed slam deserves another, huh, **sb**? :wally ---
**Author:** ![DemonSpawn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ac8455/32.png) [@DemonSpawn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DemonSpawn)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2003, 12:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975/52 "2003-08-13T12:07:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by andygirl \* > \*\*I wouldn’t break from lesbianism for that boy if you told me that after him I could have Jodie Foster. \*\* Not even if it was him and Jodie at the same time, with him wearing a Greta Garbo mask. Bleagh! ---
**Author:** ![Achren](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/898d66/32.png) [@Achren](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Achren)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2003, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975/53 "2003-08-13T18:27:30Z")
I think he appeals to pre-teen girls…and maybe 80 year old women? Though I don’t want to slam either of those groups 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2003, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975/54 "2003-08-13T18:51:25Z")
Look, I haven’t seen “Gigli” (who has?), so I can’t comment on it. But I have seen “Chasing Amy,” and while I didn’t like it much (like most Kevin Smith films, it has a few hilarious lowbrow moments, but gets both dull and silly when it attempts to get serious), it’s NOT what posters in this thread seem to be inferring it is. It’s NOT as if Ben Affleck’s character in that film was a swaggering, macho stud who effortlessly transforms lesbians into giggly, lovestruck schoolgirls. Rather, he’s a smart, charming, sensitive, funny guy who makes an EMOTIONAL connection with a lesbian… and vainly tries to build a conventional romantic relationship with her. In the end, though, he’s too insecure to make it work, and she goes back to “the other team.” In short, he doesn’t REALLY change her at all. I suppose I can understand why lesbians would be sensitive to the suggestion that they’re just “going through a phase” or that all they need is 'a REAL man" to make them change their ways. But whatever its flaws, “Chasing Amy” doesn’t suggest any such thing. It simply suggests that, sometimes, two people who are completely incompatible (and KNOW it!) will try (and fail) to make a relationship work. ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2003, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975/55 "2003-08-13T19:23:55Z")
Notice her “broad-brush” joke (or “slam” as you call it :rolleyes: )doesn’t include derogatory language, though. ---
**Author:** ![Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/46a35a/32.png) [@Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_T-Bonham.net)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2003, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975/56 "2003-08-13T22:54:38Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Orange Skinner \* > \Maybe Matt Damon owes him some favors from when they were younger, and he sleeps with producers for Ben Affleck, thus landing him the roles._\* Allright! So how do I get to be one of those producers? I’m ready to sign up anytime. ---
**Author:** ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2003, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975/57 "2003-08-14T00:30:24Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by astorian \* > \*\* > It’s NOT as if Ben Affleck’s character in that film was a swaggering, macho stud who effortlessly transforms lesbians into giggly, lovestruck schoolgirls. Rather, he’s a smart, charming, sensitive, funny guy who makes an EMOTIONAL connection with a lesbian…_\* I haven’t seen _Chasing Amy_ and I’m not going to, but I don’t think Ben Affleck would have any better luck convincing me that he’s a “smart, charming, sensitive, funny guy” than he would convincing me to hop into bed with him right away. This is a man so unappealing that, judging from this thread at least, even straight women wouldn’t give him a chance. I don’t know if I could suspend my disbelief enough to accept him in a role where his winning personality allows him to make an “EMOTIONAL connection” with _any_ woman, much less a woman who normally prefers the company of other women. ---
**Author:** ![TVeblen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@TVeblen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVeblen)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2003, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975/58 "2003-08-14T02:04:52Z")
**Moderator’s note:** Reminder to all: keep the discussion civil or the thread will die a faster, more hideous death than “Gigli”. Yes, _that_ fast and hideous. TVeblen, IMHO mod ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2003, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975/59 "2003-08-14T02:08:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lamia \* > \*\* This is a man so unappealing that, judging from this thread at least, even straight women wouldn’t give him a chance. \*\* Judging from this thread, or from ANYTHING you see on the SDMB is a silly way of gauging mass appeal. I have no doubt that I could start a thread entitled “Who Hated T?itanic” or “Who Hates Celine Dion?” and I’d get hundreds of people ranting and railing about how bad “Titanic” was, or how dreadful Celine is. Should I conclude from such threads that NOBODY in the world could possibly like that movie or Ms. Dion’s records? I could, but I’d be very foolish. I’ll let women decide for themselves whether they find Ben Affleck attractive- it makes no difference to me. But the idea that a lesbian might find him charming, and (temporarily, at least) try to have a relationship with him is no less plausible than the idea that a straight woman like… oh, I dunno, Julie Cypher, might actually try to make herself love a lesbian like, oh, I dunno, Melissa Etheridge (whom NO man I’ve ever met finds remotely attractive). In short: people of both genders and ALL orientations are weird, and sometimes they’ll surpsie you with whom they fall for. ---
**Author:** ![Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/46a35a/32.png) [@Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_T-Bonham.net)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2003, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975/60 "2003-08-14T04:13:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by astorian \* > \*\* Melissa Etheridge (whom NO man I’ve ever met finds remotely attractive). \*\* Better make that “no **straight** man” – I believe there are a whole lot of gay men who really like her! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fellow-lesbian-dopers-could-ben-affleck-convert-you/193975.md?page=4)