# Female Dopers: The "My boyfriend. . ." name drop **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 26, 2009, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/female-dopers-the-my-boyfriend-name-drop/487548 "2009-02-26T19:32:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 6\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![Bites\_When\_Provoked](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bites_when_provoked/32/18073_2.png) [@Bites\_When\_Provoked](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bites_When_Provoked)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2009, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/female-dopers-the-my-boyfriend-name-drop/487548/121 "2009-03-03T22:31:56Z")
Wouldn’t it be nice if we could actually respond, “And you’d look so much better if you fucked off and left me alone!”. ---
**Author:** ![Illuminatiprimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/illuminatiprimus/32/11520_2.png) [@Illuminatiprimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illuminatiprimus)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2009, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/female-dopers-the-my-boyfriend-name-drop/487548/122 "2009-03-03T23:33:34Z")
> [@Bites\_When\_Provoked](#): > > Wouldn’t it be nice if we could actually respond, “And you’d look so much better if you fucked off and left me alone!”. What’s stopping you? Of course you could just say something like “I’m trying but my parents were just killed in a plane crash”. That ought to shut them up. ---
**Author:** ![Bites\_When\_Provoked](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bites_when_provoked/32/18073_2.png) [@Bites\_When\_Provoked](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bites_When_Provoked)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2009, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/female-dopers-the-my-boyfriend-name-drop/487548/123 "2009-03-04T00:19:51Z")
I wouldn’t lie just to make them feel bad when telling the truth works just as well: “When the lips come back from the teeth, don’t assume it’s a smile.” (/snarl) But generally I’m just too damned pleasant for my own good… so I smile, and they think ‘Hey, that works!’ and then they do it again on some other poor sod. I’m a ‘Smile!’ enabler, and this makes me unhappy. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2009, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/female-dopers-the-my-boyfriend-name-drop/487548/124 "2009-03-04T00:45:51Z")
I don’t mind it either way. It’s a clear way of saying, “I’m getting a signal that you’re attracted to me that I’m not sure is correct. Just in case it is, I am going to tell you that I’m not available in a way that I hope doesn’t hurt your feelings.” ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2009, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/female-dopers-the-my-boyfriend-name-drop/487548/125 "2009-03-04T02:23:25Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > I don’t mind it either way. It’s a clear way of saying, “I’m getting a signal that you’re attracted to me that I’m not sure is correct. Just in case it is, I am going to tell you that I’m not available in a way that I hope doesn’t hurt your feelings.” Something clicked for me there. Not available is not the same as not interested. Its not available. It doesn’t mean “you are disgusting,” it doesn’t mean “not in a million years.” There could be that back there (particularly in the making up the boyfriend to get out of the awkward situation scenario), but in some cases women do this to protect themselves…their thoughts are … “This guy is really hot. If I didn’t have a boyfriend, I’d go out with him in a second. In fact, if he asks me out the temptation might be too much. Or I’ll throw that hesitation that makes things really awkward. Better make the proactive move so I’m not tempted…” “My boyfriend and I saw that movie last week…” ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2009, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/female-dopers-the-my-boyfriend-name-drop/487548/126 "2009-03-04T03:19:13Z")
> [@Alex\_Dubinsky](#): > > Girls that don’t smile unnecessarily and say they have a boyfriend when pressed. That lines up. Girls that are too friendly and later say they have a boyfriend. Those are teases. Girls that are very friendly then pull a contrived boyfriend line right away. Those are wtf. Girls that scowl and tell you they have a boyfriend right away. Those are bitches. Yikes. And yes, I am constantly told to smile by men I don’t know (yet know me well enough to assume I shouldn’t worry my pretty little head about anything). I’ve discussed it with guy friends and, while they get it, too, on occasion, it’s never from strangers. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/female-dopers-the-my-boyfriend-name-drop/487548.md?page=6)