# Fenris, I have a task for you - or - SDMB Smackdown! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 25, 2002, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617 "2002-04-25T19:54:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2002, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617/21 "2002-04-26T16:43:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Silentgoldfish \* > \*\* > I didn’t THINK I’d seen you do anything pit worthy. But I’ve got my eye on you, you damn martian… \*\* Uh-Oh, better close that thread on Robot Zebra Lovin’ before **Silentgoldfish** sees it!! ---
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2002, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617/22 "2002-04-26T16:46:50Z")
**Tars Tarkas** is Jeddak of Tharks; **Tarkus** is Jeddak of jerks. Not to mention ruining the name of a perfectly good Emerson, Lake & Palmer album. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2002, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617/23 "2002-04-26T17:48:52Z")
Astro posted an IMHO thread requesting advice on depression. A crowd of Dopers(I love you guys! There, I’ve said it! What a relief to have it out in the open!) rush in with all kinds of information and comfort. Then PaperTiger uses the thread as an opportunity to rant about “global capitalism”:mad: :mad: :mad: **Rolls up sleeves for first rant** PaperTiger you MOTHERFUCKING,TOADRAPING,PISSSWILLING,MORONIC, SMALLMINDED, EMPTYHEADED,SHADBORN,HEARTLESS, PUSTULANT EXAMPLE OF A WASTE OF SEMEN!!! Way to use somebody’s pain to further your goals. I apologis if this rant does meet Pit standards. It’s been a bad week. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2002, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617/24 "2002-04-26T21:05:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Why A Duck \* > \*\*Fennie on strike? I thought he was just on vacation? If he really is on strike I’m going to stop picking up his mail and mowing his lawn. \*\* I had assumed he had been “disappeared” for having the presumption to [offer to replace Cecil.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=106495) ---
**Author:** ![Sofa\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/58956e/32.png) [@Sofa\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sofa_King)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2002, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617/25 "2002-04-26T21:32:25Z")
Shadborn? ---
**Author:** ![Sofa\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/58956e/32.png) [@Sofa\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sofa_King)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2002, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617/26 "2002-04-26T21:43:37Z")
As in, “birthed by a schooling baitfish which migrates up rivers to spawn”? ---
**Author:** ![minty\_green](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@minty\_green](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/minty_green)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2002, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617/27 "2002-04-26T22:21:50Z")
Sounds Pit-worthy to me, SK. ---
**Author:** ![Sofa\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/58956e/32.png) [@Sofa\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sofa_King)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2002, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617/28 "2002-04-26T22:32:39Z")
Oh, yeah, it’s totally okay with me. I’m just unfamiliar with the term. Lemme try it on for size here: **Komsomol** , you shadborn pinko lapdog! Yeah, I like it just fine. ---
**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617/29 "2002-04-27T01:07:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TwistofFate \* > \*\*I would imagine a match between the esteemed intellectuals mentioned in the OP as equivalent to a Hogan-Sid-Nash-Tugboat “dog doo on a pole” Scaffold match booked by Vince Russo. > > Don’t worry, Wrestling fans will get it. 😉 \*\* You forgot David Arquette as special guest referee. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 9:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617/30 "2002-04-27T09:48:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Francesca \* > \*\*Since when did **Fenris** become your bitch? 😉 \*\* We ain’t gonna play “Let’s you and him fight” in MY Pit. **Esprix,** , if you want someone flamed, flame him yourself. Lynn For the Straight Dope ---
**Author:** ![Silentgoldfish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e36b37/32.png) [@Silentgoldfish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silentgoldfish)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 11:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617/31 "2002-04-27T11:57:47Z")
_whine_ But Fenris’s flames are so much more _interesting_ than everyone elses! _pout_ Well, they **are**. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617/32 "2002-04-27T12:45:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Sofa King \* > \*\*As in, “birthed by a schooling baitfish which migrates up rivers to spawn”? \*\* [Is it true every type of animal dropping has its own name?](http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a1_287b.html) It was in this column, Unca Cecil tought us all the fine word shadborn. ``` It's the duty of every Doper to read everything Cecil's has ever written. Twice at the very least. ``` ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617/33 "2002-04-27T12:53:30Z")
I could have also called PaperTiger a- **stercoricolous, pulicous piece of tath** who I’m amazed stopped **blissoming** long enough to post anything. But, that just doesn’t scan as well. ---
**Author:** ![Silentgoldfish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e36b37/32.png) [@Silentgoldfish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silentgoldfish)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617/34 "2002-04-27T13:50:13Z")
Godamn it, I though Lynn was closing the thread and accidentally letting me have a cool parting shot while she did it. ---
**Author:** ![sturmhauke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47c2d/32.png) [@sturmhauke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sturmhauke)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2002, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617/35 "2002-04-28T04:45:36Z")
Ok, I’m back from my lunch break. Here goes: My, those fellows sure are a bunch of bastards. Yes indeed, I’ve never in my life seen such bastards as those. Why, I think they must be the ones who killed Kenny. Bastards. ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2002, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617/36 "2002-04-28T04:52:01Z")
Do the Fearsome Foursome know they are being called out? Will there be theme music? Will **Tarkus** ’s Theme music be _It’s Raining Men_? Will \*\* Omnipresent\*\* use _I Will Survive_? Will **Power\_Station** use _America_? Will **LongRoad** use the theme from _Enterprise_ (“It’s been a long road, gettin’ from there to here…”)? Who will be our champions? what will their themes be? ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2002, 6:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617/37 "2002-04-28T06:55:10Z")
But **Lynn** , **Fenris** is so much better at this clever wordplay stuff than I. Sadly, he’s unavailable, so I might just have to do it myself… Esprix ---
**Author:** ![edwino](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/35a633/32.png) [@edwino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/edwino)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2002, 8:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617/38 "2002-04-28T08:15:30Z")
Esprix, I’ll handle it: LongRoad, Tarkus, POWER\_station, and Omnipresent, You, sirs, are no gentlemen. ---
**Author:** ![reprise](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ea666f/32.png) [@reprise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/reprise)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2002, 8:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617/39 "2002-04-28T08:19:11Z")
Sorry **Esprix** , but Lynn telling you to do your own flaming cracked me up - isn’t it being a “flaming homosexual” that attracts the wrath of the homophobes? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fenris-i-have-a-task-for-you-or-sdmb-smackdown/105617.md?page=1)