# FHM and MAXIM delivered to city hall **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 17, 2006, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167 "2006-05-17T21:24:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Antigen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/848f3c/32.png) [@Antigen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antigen)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167/61 "2006-05-18T16:26:09Z")
> [@chela](#): > > OTOH I wonder how they’ll feel about the free sample of queen size girdle undies in nude I forwarded to the “fire dept”. Though I think queen size will barely fit the slimmest officer they have. Now we are talking fetish hmmm. HA! Seriously, what is wrong with you? Are you twelve years old? If you’re actually upset by these magazines, which I suppose is your right even if we all think you’re overreacting, then **go complain about them through the proper channels**. Sending undies to the fire department to retaliate because your sad, prude, little eyes were forced, _forced_ to look at Eva Longoria’s airbrushed ass-cleavage (you know, after you stuffed your face into those mail cubbies to see what was in there), is juvenile and stupid and I hope you catch shit for it. ---
**Author:** ![Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troy_mcclure_sf/32/4150_2.png) [@Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troy_McClure_SF)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167/62 "2006-05-18T16:32:10Z")
> [@Amaranta](#): > > I haven’t glanced at a Maxim in ages, but even a couple years ago they were filled with tips on tricking your girlfriend into anal sex, or threesomes, or videotaping your encounters, or how to juggle several girlfriends. But I’ve never seen someone who actually had a girlfriend reading the mags - guys in high school would buy it and drool over the scantily clad chicks and giggle over the jokes and talk about the sex tips that none of them were in a position to use. Methinks you take Maxim a bit too seriously. Any guy who actually beleives that the “trick your girlfriend into anal sex” articles are anything but parody is a fucking idiot. Also, women read (and write) a lot of Maxim. Shit, my mom reads more Maxim than I do. The whole thing is tongue-in-cheek, with a little cheek thrown in. I’d be more scared of the advice given in stuff like Cosmo, which I’ve seen taken seriously on more than one occasion. And don’t even get me started on celebrity gossip. **chela** - chill. ---
**Author:** ![Fish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bc8723/32.png) [@Fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fish)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167/63 "2006-05-18T16:54:51Z")
> [@Robot Arm](#): > > Maxim does not speak for me, or for any man I’ve ever met. So what? I’m just saying she reads it, and why she does. She prefers Maxim’s polls to Cosmo’s, says Cosmo is too fluffy and girly and Maxim “more real.” Don’t construe that as a personal endorsement from me that Maxim’s polls are any more accurate. > [@Troy McClure SF](#): > > Any guy who actually beleives that the “trick your girlfriend into anal sex” articles are anything but parody is a fucking idiot. I can attest to having seen Cosmo headlines of “how to trick your man into” or “50 ways to get your man to” articles. They’re no better, but for some reason, Cosmo is allowed and Maxim is verboten. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167/64 "2006-05-18T17:48:53Z")
> [@chela](#): > > Thanks for those thoughtful comments such as they were. > > Yeah i maintain it is soft porn, at least that FHM is… I wonder if my city would be as blase if someone was receiving “high times”, or “your gay life” One of my friends is a Deadhead. I’ve read a few issues of High Times. It is transparently dedicated to illegal activity. One of my friends is gay. I’ve read a few issues of The Advocate. It is a magazine about gay culture, gay rights, politics, economics, and the selling of overpriced things to gay yuppies (like my guppy friend.). It contains no nudity. It does not advocate illegal activity. Why do you compare the two magazines? Before anybody objects, I know she said “your gay life”. That implies a magazine like the advocate rather than one like Studpuppy or Bareback Rodeo. Considering that Philadelphia allocates money specifically to advertise as a GLBT friendly vacation spot (Which it is. You’re queer. But, you’re not here. We’ve got fabulous gelatto!), I’d be surprised if somebody at city hall was not receiving the Advocate, as part of the research into how effective the ad campaigns are, and how Philly is perceived by the GLBT community in America. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167/65 "2006-05-18T18:01:27Z")
> [@Hunter Hawk](#): > > Lookit, I consider myself a square and the last magazine I bought featured a naked chick in a bathtub with an octopus on her head. Hmmm…ennapussy. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167/66 "2006-05-18T18:16:38Z")
> [@Fish](#): > > So what? I’m just saying she reads it, and why she does. She prefers Maxim’s polls to Cosmo’s, says Cosmo is too fluffy and girly and Maxim “more real.” Don’t construe that as a personal endorsement from me that Maxim’s polls are any more accurate. I know it’s not your endorsement, but I think your friend is in for some disappointment and/or confusion if she’s reading Maxim for any real insight about men. ---
**Author:** ![5que](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/5/3bc359/32.png) [@5que](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/5que)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167/67 "2006-05-18T18:18:49Z")
> [@Hunter Hawk](#): > > Lookit, I consider myself a square and the last magazine I bought featured a naked chick in a bathtub with an octopus on her head. Cite? Oh please, oh please, oh please, oh please ---
**Author:** ![5que](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/5/3bc359/32.png) [@5que](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/5que)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167/68 "2006-05-18T18:21:18Z")
> [@Big Bad Voodoo Lou](#): > > Is anyone else imagining the OP as disapproving, prudish Angela from _The Office_? With a little Gladys Kravitz thrown in for good measure. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167/69 "2006-05-18T18:36:22Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > Next, its **Maxim** , you selfrighteous hypcrite- not Butt Fucking Monthly. I’m glad to see I’m not the only one who thinks BFM has gone seriously downhill since they got that new editor. I don’t expect great prose, but at least spell-check once in a while! ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167/70 "2006-05-18T18:38:30Z")
> [@](#): > > With a little Gladys Kravitz thrown in for good measure. “Abner! The Stevenses are at it again!” “What, Gladys?” “They’re in the bathtub! Both of them! With octopi on their heads!” “It’s _octopodes_, Gladys.” … ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167/71 "2006-05-18T18:42:43Z")
> [@chela](#): > > Thanks for those thoughtful comments such as they were. > > Yeah i maintain it is soft porn, at least that FHM is… I wonder if my city would be as blase if someone was receiving “high times”, or “your gay life” or something like that. ::shrug:: I highly doubt it. Yeah, see… the thing about definitions is that you don’t get to invent your own. I can scream 'til I’m blue in the face that the Washington Post is kiddie porn, but all that’s going to do is make people point at me and laugh. Much as they are doing to you in this thread. Calling Maxim or FHM porn is ridiculous, and strips the word “pornography” of meaning. > [@](#): > > OTOH I wonder how they’ll feel about the free sample of queen size girdle undies in nude I forwarded to the “fire dept”. Though I think queen size will barely fit the slimmest officer they have. Now we are talking fetish hmmm. HA! I’m pretty sure no one at the fire department is going to much care about your panties. (Which, as a previous poster has hypothesized, seems to be the real root of your complaint here.) And again, unless you’re masturbating to the thought of firemen in panties, it’s not a fetish. At best, it’s an immature prank that’s not going to make any sense to the “victims.” > [@](#): > > By posting about it here it helps vent my frustration which has mounted due to other issues in the office (city manager tiptoeing up behind female workers in his socks and stands there breathing until you notice or he says BOO). Lack of resources for my department, and on and on. Why not vent about that, then, and not this pathetic non-issue. > [@](#): > > My oppostion to those subscriptions has nothing do with prudism, sexism yes. Wait, you’re saying you’re upset about these magazines because _your_ sexist? 😕 > [@](#): > > BUt no doubt others will see girlie magazines in the workplace as a positive progressive symbol of our culture. I disagree. 🙂 Which pretty much directly contradicts your earlier disavowal of prudishness. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167/72 "2006-05-18T19:24:28Z")
> [@Martini Enfield](#): > > Here’s a little-known Male Secret: _Heterosexual Men Like To See Attractive Women Not Wearing Very Much, Or Better Yet, Nothing At All- Except Possibly Some Knee-High Boots._😃 Or, _Thigh_-high boots, or thigh-high _stockings_, or high heels, or… as you said "_Women Not Wearing Very Much"_ 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Faruiza](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecd19e/32.png) [@Faruiza](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Faruiza)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167/73 "2006-05-18T19:38:11Z")
And here I thought this nasty little migraine I have today was going to prevent me from getting worked up about ANYTHING. I was wrong. I’m pissed. Chela, you ankle biting little snit, YOU are the kind of person that jacks things up for the rest of the world who knows how to live and let live. Just because YOU have some frustration or pent up hostility toward the human body, (that’s not even nekkid!!!) your whining and complaining about how it offends YOU is going to get an actual policy put in place that forbids anything but the most sterile business communication to take place or enter the office at all. No matter that 450 other people (or however many inhabit your office) don’t have an issue with it, nooo! YOU are here to sanitize everything for our protection because YOU don’t like it! This is the stuff that clogs our courts and makes normal people’s lives miserable. Nobody is forcing you to look at an X rated movie, ala Clockwork Orange. Nobody is actually pulling their prick in front of you, nor does a couple of periodicals geared toward men going to make them start. What are you afraid of, exactly? No, scratch that. I don’t really care. What I do care about is that YOU are the very model of person I think ought to be living in a place where they don’t interact with anyone but people of their own mind. You want to bitch about your right not to be offended?! I am here to counter that bitch with one of my own. It isn’t offensive, and you don’t get to make up the definition of that notion if it requires a blanket action to modify the behavior of the majority. I would have left this alone if you were complaining about the city tax dollars paying for the subscriptions, or that some real harassment was going on in City Hall, or that everyone but you was spending their time screwing around instead of working, and until you can prove that they are, **you** can take **your** hangups and get the hell out of here. I’m sick of your kind. You frigid little weasel. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167/74 "2006-05-18T19:42:59Z")
> [@chela](#): > > OTOH I wonder how they’ll feel about the free sample of queen size girdle undies in nude I forwarded to the “fire dept”. Though I think queen size will barely fit the slimmest officer they have. Now we are talking fetish hmmm. HA! Wow, aren’t we mature? :rolleyes: Reminds me of my fifth grade teacher who yelled at me for bringing in “dirty magazines.” Because my friend and I were looking at TEEN during recess. TEEN. ---
**Author:** ![pizzabrat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e9c0ed/32.png) [@pizzabrat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pizzabrat)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167/75 "2006-05-18T19:52:56Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > Wow, aren’t we mature? :rolleyes: > > Reminds me of my fifth grade teacher who yelled at me for bringing in “dirty magazines.” Because my friend and I were looking at TEEN during recess. TEEN. TEEN? TEEN?! The hell is that? ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167/76 "2006-05-18T19:54:10Z")
> [@pizzabrat](#): > > TEEN? TEEN?! > > The hell is that? It’s a magazine for teenage girls, similiar to SEVENTEEN. It’s got some fashion, advice columns, some articles, etc. Pretty bland. I think there was an article about teen pregnancy or something that my teacher objected to. Whatever. ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167/77 "2006-05-18T19:55:04Z")
> [@chela](#): > > Does this also mean one can view these mags online now while at work? The Treasurer of the city just chuckled when I showed him! Outwardly he chuckled. Inwardly he busted out laughing until his sides hurt and tears streamed from his eyes. > [@](#): > > What do you think? I think what several other people have already voiced, some more politely than others: the fact that you’ve gotten this worked up over these magazines seems to speak volumes about you rather than the firefighters. ---
**Author:** ![rayh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e79b87/32.png) [@rayh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rayh)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167/78 "2006-05-18T20:02:30Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > Hell, for the _Firemen_, I 'd have no problem with Butt Fucking Monthly (as long as the female firefighters got “Hung Studs Monthly” to be fair). Ah, but what if it was the female firefighters who got Butt Fucking Monthly and it was the male firefighters who got Hung Studs Monthly? ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167/79 "2006-05-18T20:03:54Z")
Okay - I just had an eeeevil thought: Can we get **chela** ’s address at city hall and send her the **FHM Magazine for $6** from the Google ad below? 😉 BTW, **Guin** , if you think getting yelled at for Teen was surreal - I once asked my hometown librarian if there were a way I could request that the library get a subscription to [Analog](http://www.analogsf.com/0606/issue_06.shtml). I was told, in a very haughty voice, that the library would never get one of **those** magazines. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167/80 "2006-05-18T20:18:53Z")
This might shock you to no end, but we get _thousands of magazines_ at my workplace. All kinds of 'em. Some of them downright offensive to a lot of people. Then we carefully archive them and save them so nobody misses anything! Did I mention I’m a periodicals librarian? We don’t get Maxim and FHM, because they’d get stolen, but we get plenty of boobies. We have to keep the swimsuit issue behind the desk, though, because if it goes into the bathroom we throw it out. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fhm-and-maxim-delivered-to-city-hall/357167.md?page=5)