# Fictional characters most likely to give their creators a pop in the schnozz **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 1, 2011, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-characters-most-likely-to-give-their-creators-a-pop-in-the-schnozz/569814 "2011-02-01T20:01:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![furryman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/furryman/32/99_2.png) [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2011, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-characters-most-likely-to-give-their-creators-a-pop-in-the-schnozz/569814/41 "2011-02-02T17:11:05Z")
Miles O’Brien from Star Trek John Crichton from Farscape I heard a quote from one of Deep Space Nine’s creators saying that many of the episodes involving Miles O’Brien were simply “How can we mess with him this week.” I often thought the plot of most of the Farscape episodes was “How can we mess with John Crichton’s mind this week.” ---
**Author:** ![Wheelz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wheelz/32/5718_2.png) [@Wheelz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wheelz)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2011, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-characters-most-likely-to-give-their-creators-a-pop-in-the-schnozz/569814/42 "2011-02-02T17:27:32Z")
Andy Sipowicz of _NYPD Blue_ suffered through the deaths of his son, his wife, and two partners; was shot, got prostate cancer, had a leukemia scare with his younger son, and probably a bunch of other nasty stuff I’ve forgotten; all while battling his own raging alcoholism. I’m sure he’d welcome the chance to punch Steven Bochco hard in the nuts. ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2011, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-characters-most-likely-to-give-their-creators-a-pop-in-the-schnozz/569814/43 "2011-02-02T17:45:18Z")
> [@JThunder](#): > > I suspect that Jack Bauer would have some harsh words for his writers. Beaten to Jack Bauer, so I’ll suggest that if Leroy Jethro Gibbs had a chance to speak to Messrs. Bellisario and McGill about his back story, only one person would wind up walking away from the meeting. Oh, and then there’s Doctor Romano from _ER_. :barely-stifled chuckle: ---
**Author:** ![Mtgman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5a626/32.png) [@Mtgman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mtgman)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2011, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-characters-most-likely-to-give-their-creators-a-pop-in-the-schnozz/569814/44 "2011-02-02T17:52:25Z")
There will be a queue outside Stan Lee’s door. I personally think Cyclops should be allowed to head it up, although most of his suffering came at the hands of Chris Claremont. Wonder Woman is so fracked up I’m not sure if she’d schnozz smash Bill Moulton or tie him up and have her way with him. I’m having a hard time thinking of any comic book characters, mostly heroes, who WOULDN’T kick the crap out of their authors. The villains may or may not because they tend to like who they are, but ever since Marvel introduced melodrama into the comic book world the heroes have almost all had tragedy in their lives. Enjoy, Steven ---
**Author:** ![Satchmo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/satchmo/32/4223_2.png) [@Satchmo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satchmo)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2011, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-characters-most-likely-to-give-their-creators-a-pop-in-the-schnozz/569814/45 "2011-02-02T18:10:56Z")
More in the line of Pearls before Swine, but Cheech Wizard did more than punch Bode in the nose the one time he appeared in the strip. Of course, he was laying it on pretty thick. ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2011, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-characters-most-likely-to-give-their-creators-a-pop-in-the-schnozz/569814/46 "2011-02-02T19:00:31Z")
I’d imagine that Stephen Maturin would have a long discussion with Patrick O’Brian about Diana, and how all that worked out. ---
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2011, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-characters-most-likely-to-give-their-creators-a-pop-in-the-schnozz/569814/47 "2011-02-02T19:00:34Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Whedon killed off Fred. Wesley is not going to have _words_ with him. He’s going to murder him out of hand. Or maybe sit Whedon down and explain that he’s going to write Fred back to life, or he’s going to get his bucket taken away. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2011, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-characters-most-likely-to-give-their-creators-a-pop-in-the-schnozz/569814/48 "2011-02-02T19:02:58Z")
> [@KneadToKnow](#): > > Beaten to Jack Bauer, so I’ll suggest that if Leroy Jethro Gibbs had a chance to speak to Messrs. Bellisario and McGill about his back story, only one person would wind up walking away from the meeting. > > Oh, and then there’s Doctor Romano from _ER_. :barely-stifled chuckle: I suspect that, in his last microseconds of life, Romano realized that his true enemy was the helicopter god, and repented of his affronts to Him. In his mercy, Chopperius took Romano to his bosom after death. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2011, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-characters-most-likely-to-give-their-creators-a-pop-in-the-schnozz/569814/49 "2011-02-02T19:07:56Z")
> [@bump](#): > > I’d imagine that Stephen Maturin would have a long discussion with Patrick O’Brian about Diana, and how all that worked out. Good lord, Stephen would twist his nose, skewer him and finally shoot him with a dueling pistol. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2011, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-characters-most-likely-to-give-their-creators-a-pop-in-the-schnozz/569814/50 "2011-02-02T19:11:36Z")
> [@Mtgman](#): > > There will be a queue outside Stan Lee’s door. I personally think Cyclops should be allowed to head it up, although most of his suffering came at the hands of Chris Claremont. That should be the entire friggin’ Summers family, actually. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2011, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-characters-most-likely-to-give-their-creators-a-pop-in-the-schnozz/569814/51 "2011-02-02T19:34:52Z")
A great, great many of Gene Wolfe’s characters owe him an asswhipping. Severian, the main character of his masterpiece Book of the New Sun, assists his beloved in committing suicide after she’s been tortured, sees his adopted son incinerated, is scarred and maimed, and just generally gets screwed over despite being The Conciliator. This doesn’t even count the iterations of him that die if you start tracing all the different time lines. The various secondary characters tend to fair even worse. ---
**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2011, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-characters-most-likely-to-give-their-creators-a-pop-in-the-schnozz/569814/52 "2011-02-02T19:53:14Z")
Private dick Clyde Umney would do all that and more, what with his creator being a theiving bastard. ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2011, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-characters-most-likely-to-give-their-creators-a-pop-in-the-schnozz/569814/53 "2011-02-03T01:14:17Z")
I think Roland from the Dark Tower series qualifies. But then again… I guess he already had his chance in a way and he ended up helping the dude IIRC. ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2011, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-characters-most-likely-to-give-their-creators-a-pop-in-the-schnozz/569814/54 "2011-02-03T01:42:28Z")
David Hopkins, author of the web comic Jack, already has _ **Lucifer** _ as his in-strip avatar; and because all the other characters only exist because Hopkins/Lucifer draws the comic that is the reality they exist in (and a couple of them KNOW this), there isn’t a lot they can do. However, Hopkins/Lucifer is only the demiurge of that reality, and most of the characters complaints are against God, as in “why the F do you permit this??” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-characters-most-likely-to-give-their-creators-a-pop-in-the-schnozz/569814.md?page=2)