# Fictional universes you wouldn't last a minute in **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 17, 2012, 8:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-universes-you-wouldnt-last-a-minute-in/637978 "2012-10-17T08:01:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Quercus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/7ab992/32.png) [@Quercus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quercus)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2012, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-universes-you-wouldnt-last-a-minute-in/637978/21 "2012-10-18T13:36:51Z")
> [@Scumpup](#): > > I dunno…I’d do alright in the Lovecraft universe, I think. Within the context of the stories, all the Cosmic Stuff is pretty far from being common knowledge. The main characters, as far as I remember, aren’t some schlub in the street like me who gets drawn into Forbidden Things. They are people who, through extraordinary circumstances, come to grief. For me, living in the Lovecraft universe would most likely be exactly like living in this one. You voluntarily read and post to the Dope, yet you think that you would never end up coming across Forbidden Knowledge? Come on, we’re all way-faster-than-average goners in the Lovecraft universe! ---
**Author:** ![manila](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e5b9ba/32.png) [@manila](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/manila)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2012, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-universes-you-wouldnt-last-a-minute-in/637978/22 "2012-10-18T13:44:09Z")
> [@Alessan](#): > > The Homeric alternate universe depicted in Dan Simmons’ \*Illium \*and _Olympus_; everyone there is essentially a beautiful, physically perfect, superhuman violent sociopath, including the women; \*especially \*the women. They’d hunt me for sport. Err… If we can get a deal on two for one tickets, you kinda like wanna go together? ---
**Author:** ![Yodalicious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yodalicious/32/8195_2.png) [@Yodalicious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yodalicious)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2012, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-universes-you-wouldnt-last-a-minute-in/637978/23 "2012-10-18T16:05:55Z")
Marvel or DC. New York City, Gotham City, and Metropolis are constantly under threat by some super villain. Sure The Avengers or Superman will eventually save the day, but how many civilians die first from explosions, monsters, buildings being crashed into during fights, alien invasions, etc. ---
**Author:** ![MacSpon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/34f0e0/32.png) [@MacSpon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacSpon)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2012, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-universes-you-wouldnt-last-a-minute-in/637978/24 "2012-10-18T20:24:31Z")
> [@Daddypants](#): > > Marvel or DC. > > New York City, Gotham City, and Metropolis are constantly under threat by some super villain. Sure The Avengers or Superman will eventually save the day, but how many civilians die first from explosions, monsters, buildings being crashed into during fights, alien invasions, etc. Marvel or DC, but for different reasons than the above. I’m assuming that the “me” who lives there has my current special knowledge. That means I know, say, Superman’s or Spiderman’s secret identity, plus a whole bunch of other “secrets”. The chance that I’d be able to resist using that? Zero. Sending anonymous tease notes to Bruce Wayne about his Batman activities, for example; I’d do that in a heartbeat. (Yeah, yeah, world’s greatest detective; he’d find out it was me. It would be worth it! Plus, what’s he gonna do? Maybe I get a threatening visit from the Batman! _Double_ worth it!) ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2012, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-universes-you-wouldnt-last-a-minute-in/637978/25 "2012-10-18T20:43:47Z")
Marvel or DC. I’d be able to keep their identities but I’d totally want to go see the action that I’d probably have a building fall on me once I got to the action 15-30 minutes after I arrived. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2012, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-universes-you-wouldnt-last-a-minute-in/637978/26 "2012-10-18T23:02:50Z")
How the heck do I manage to survive in _this one?_😕 ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2012, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-universes-you-wouldnt-last-a-minute-in/637978/27 "2012-10-19T00:36:50Z")
My husband says he’s locking me in a closet should the elder gods ever awaken, because I love big slimy tentacled creatures the way children love puppies. I’d be the one running up and saying, “It’s not evil, it’s just misunderst-” CHOMP! ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2012, 10:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-universes-you-wouldnt-last-a-minute-in/637978/28 "2012-10-22T10:12:09Z")
I’m not really enough of an Arkham Horror nerd to really know for sure, but I don’t think the Lovecraftian creatures were even evil per se. I think at least Cthulhu and a few others actively subjugated humanity at one point, but most of them are just portrayed as so utterly alien that humanity doesn’t even ping their radar – it makes humans dead and insane but isn’t really **trying** to do anything, for a good or bad reason, they just are. It’s like bugs when you’re riding at 75mph down the interstate in your car. You don’t even notice you’ve massacred hundreds of critters until you stop to get gas and go “how the hell did my windshield get so dirty?” Even so, your husband if probably right to keep you locked up because CHOMP. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2012, 10:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-universes-you-wouldnt-last-a-minute-in/637978/29 "2012-10-22T10:46:13Z")
I don’t think I’d last long in a Oscar Wilde play. \ ***Lady Bracknell:** Now to minor matters. Are your parents living? \*\*Me: \*\* I have lost both my parents. \*\*Lady Bracknell: \*\* To lose one parent, Mr. Alessan, may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness. \*_Me: \*\* Go fuck yourself._ ---
**Author:** ![Agent\_Foxtrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9fc29f/32.png) [@Agent\_Foxtrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Agent_Foxtrot)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2012, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-universes-you-wouldnt-last-a-minute-in/637978/30 "2012-10-23T04:40:06Z")
> [@aruvqan](#): > > Any world that did not have insulin and the rest of the drugs that keep me alive. I can deal without painkillers, but the stuff that makes my heart behave is pretty essential 😛 > > Hm, if I were healthy - I would have issues in the Cthulu universe - again I would poke my nose into the unknowable and get slabbed by something, or sent to the giggle factory in a hug me jacket. The Paranoia universe - the computer would assign me as reactor shielding for possibly being part of a conspiracy, I am a bit of a mouthy bitch and would probably say something where I could be overheard, as I am also not into blindly obeying authority. Anywhere that would burn me for being a witch, or heretic of some sort as I am an agnostic and dislike mindless authority especially if it is religious based. I came in to mention the Paranoia universe. I’d probably burn through my six-pack in less than 60 seconds. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2012, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-universes-you-wouldnt-last-a-minute-in/637978/31 "2012-10-23T14:45:05Z")
In the original Xanth books, not having a magical power was punishable by banishment. Since I don’t have anything, I suppose I’d be quickly banished back into the “real” world as soon as I was discovered. Better than being killed but I wouldn’t last in Xanth. This also assumes I live that long without being consumed by the local flora or fauna. I guess later books touch on this rule being relaxed or removed but I don’t have details there. ---
**Author:** ![InsomniaMama](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/ad7895/32.png) [@InsomniaMama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/InsomniaMama)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2012, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-universes-you-wouldnt-last-a-minute-in/637978/32 "2012-10-23T16:00:05Z")
Hey, **olivesmarch4th** , knock knock! (who’s there?) Interrupting big slimy tentacled creature! (Interrupting big slimy tenta–) CHOMP! ---
**Author:** ![GargoyleWB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gargoylewb/32/199_2.png) [@GargoyleWB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GargoyleWB)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2012, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-universes-you-wouldnt-last-a-minute-in/637978/33 "2012-10-23T20:02:25Z")
The gunslinging Old West. It would be painfully clear that I was an educated big-city dandy who’d never sat a horse, roped a calf, or chewed 'baccy in my life. After unintentionally insulting the first roughneck I met, I’d be shot, hung, dragged, shot again, tarred, feathered, and then shot. “But wait, guys, I can help you invent solid-state circuitry! What about data compression, who doesn’t love data compression? Guys?..” _gallows trapdoor opens_ ---
**Author:** ![Mrs.Cake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2acd7d/32.png) [@Mrs.Cake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mrs.Cake)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2012, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-universes-you-wouldnt-last-a-minute-in/637978/34 "2012-10-23T20:24:49Z")
Given that I’m 50 years old, I don;t think I’d last very long in the _Logan’s Run_ universe. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2012, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-universes-you-wouldnt-last-a-minute-in/637978/35 "2012-10-23T20:45:18Z")
> [@Jragon](#): > > it makes humans dead and insane but isn’t really **trying** to do anything, for a good or bad reason, they just are. That’s the beauty of it! ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2012, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-universes-you-wouldnt-last-a-minute-in/637978/36 "2012-10-23T20:53:17Z")
If I woke up in _Watchmen_’s mid-80s with Nixon still president, I’d blow my brains out. ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2012, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-universes-you-wouldnt-last-a-minute-in/637978/37 "2012-10-23T20:58:32Z")
> [@Ludovic](#): > > That’s the beauty of it! If I had no morals I’d get in on a military research project to develop a weapon to drive people insane (even if only temporarily). It’d be called the “Outer God” and each new series revision would have names like “Azathoth” or “Nyarlathotep”. It would be beautiful. ---
**Author:** ![ministryman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@ministryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ministryman)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2012, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-universes-you-wouldnt-last-a-minute-in/637978/38 "2012-10-23T20:59:14Z")
> [@Mrs.Cake](#): > > Given that I’m 50 years old, I don;t think I’d last very long in the _Logan’s Run_ universe. You’d have to last long enough to sample the “Dial SOmething Warm for the Evening” transporter, though 😃 Then the sandmen could take you. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fictional-universes-you-wouldnt-last-a-minute-in/637978.md?page=1)