# Fight the glurge?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-the-glurge/327433
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [October 22, 2005, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-the-glurge/327433 "2005-10-22T16:10:58Z")
**Posts on this page:** 10
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)
#### Post date: [October 22, 2005, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-the-glurge/327433/1 "2005-10-22T16:10:58Z")
I was checking my inbox this morning and got this chain letter from one of my friends (along with a bunch of her friends):
> [@](#):
>
> Too Busy for a Friend…
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>One day a teacher asked her students to list the names of the
> \>\>\>other students in the room on two sheets of paper, leaving a space
> \>\>\>between each name.
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>Then she told them to think of the nicest thing they could say
> \>\>\>about each of their classmates and write it down.
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>It took the remainder of the class period to finish their
> \>\>\>assignment, and as the students left the room, each one handed in
> \>\>\>the papers.
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>That Saturday, the teacher wrote down the name of each student on
> \>\>\>a separate sheet of paper, and listed what everyone else had said
> \>\>\>about that individual.
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>On Monday she gave each student his or her list. Before long, the
> \>\>\>entire class was smiling. “Really?” she heard whispered. “I never
> \>\>\>knew that I meant anything to anyone!” and, “I didn’t know others
> \>\>\>liked me so much,” were most of the comments.
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>No one ever mentioned those papers in class again. She never knew
> \>\>\>if they discussed them after class or with their parents, but it
> \>\>\>didn’t matter The exercise had accomplished its purpose. The
> \>\>\>students were happy with themselves and one another. That group of
> \>\>\>students moved on.
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>Several years later, one of the students was killed in Viet Nam
> \>\>\>and his teacher attended the funeral of that special student. She
> \>\>\>had never seen a serviceman in a military coffin before. He looked
> \>\>\>so handsome, so mature.
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>The church was packed with his friends. One by one those who loved
> \>\>\>him took a last walk by the coffin. The teacher was the last one
> \>\>\>to bless the coffin.
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>As she stood there, one of the soldiers who acted as pallbearer
> \>\>\>came up to her. “Were you Mark’s math teacher?” he asked. She
> \>\>\>nodded: “yes.” Then he said: “Mark talked about you a lot.”
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>After the funeral, most of Mark’s former classmates went together
> \>\>\>to a luncheon. Mark’s mother and father were there, obviously
> \>\>\>waiting to speak with his teacher.
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>“We want to show you something,” his father said, taking a wallet
> \>\>\>out of his pocket. “They found this on Mark when he was killed. We
> \>\>\>thought you might recognize it.”
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>Opening the billfold, he carefully removed two worn pieces of
> \>\>\>notebook paper that had obviously been taped, folded and refolded
> \>\>\>many times. The teacher knew without looking that the papers were
> \>\>\>the ones on which she had listed all the good things each of
> \>\>\>Mark’s classmates had said about him.
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>“Thank you so much for doing that,” Mark’s mother said. “As you
> \>\>\>can see, Mark treasured it.”
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>All of Mark’s former classmates started to gather around. Charlie
> \>\>\>smiled rather sheepishly and said, “I still have my list. It’s in
> \>\>\>the top drawer of my desk at home.”
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>Chuck’s wife said, “Chuck asked me to put his in our wedding
> \>\>\>album.”
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>“I have mine too,” Marilyn said. “It’s in my diary.”
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>Then Vicki, another classmate, reached into her pocketbook, took
> \>\>\>out her wallet and showed her worn and frazzled list to the group.
> \>\>\>“I carry this with me at all times,” Vicki said and without
> \>\>\>batting an eyelash, she continued: “I think we all saved our
> \>\>\>lists.”
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>That’s when the teacher finally sat down and cried. She cried for
> \>\>\>Mark and for all his friends who would never see him again.
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>The density of people in society is so thick that we forget that
> \>\>\>life will end one day. And we don’t know when that one day will
> \>\>\>be.
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>So please, tell the people you love and care for, that they are
> \>\>\>special and important. Tell them, before it is too late.
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>And One Way To Accomplish This Is: Forward this message on. If you
> \>\>\>do not send it, you will have, once again passed up the wonderful
> \>\>\>opportunity to do something nice and beautiful.
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>If you’ve received this, it is because someone cares for you and
> \>\>\>it means there is probably at least someone for whom you care.
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>If you’re “too busy” to take those few minutes right now to
> \>\>\>forward this message on, would this be the VERY first time you
> \>\>\>didn’t do that little thing that would make a difference in your
> \>\>\>relationships?
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>The more people that you send this to, the better you’ll be at
> \>\>\>reaching out to those you care about.
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>Remember, you reap what you sow. What you put into the lives of
> \>\>\>others comes back into your own.
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>
> \>\>\>May Your Day Be Blessed As Special As You Are
This sounds a little too familiar, I thought, and checked up on Snopes. [Lo and behold](http://www.snopes.com/glurge/allgood.asp).
But what do I do now? It’s not like I can actually debunk this, since she never _says_ it’s true… and I don’t want to hurt her feelings.
Help!
---
### Author:  [@picunurse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/picunurse)
#### Post date: [October 23, 2005, 10:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-the-glurge/327433/2 "2005-10-23T10:01:07Z")
I usually just return the Snopes page to the person, with little or no comment. It sometimes helps. :rolleyes: not always, but occasionally, well rarely, but it has cut down on the junk I get.
I have a very sparce mail box. No more friends, I don’t know why. 😃
---
### Author:  [@FlyingRamenMonster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FlyingRamenMonster)
#### Post date: [October 23, 2005, 10:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-the-glurge/327433/3 "2005-10-23T10:40:28Z")
I heartily second the “no mercy” stance. Repeat until they get the point.
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### Author:  [@Silentgoldfish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silentgoldfish)
#### Post date: [October 23, 2005, 10:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-the-glurge/327433/4 "2005-10-23T10:59:32Z")
Why bother doing anything but ignoring it? People who like glurge like it for the message, not because it’s neccessarily true. All you’re doing is working yourself up over nothing.
Send it to the trashbin and forget about it.
---
### Author:  [@badbadrubberpiggy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/badbadrubberpiggy)
#### Post date: [October 23, 2005, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-the-glurge/327433/5 "2005-10-23T14:09:09Z")
> [@Kythereia](#):
>
> I was checking my inbox this morning and got this chain letter from one of my friends (along with a bunch of her friends):
>
> This sounds a little too familiar, I thought, and checked up on Snopes. [Lo and behold](http://www.snopes.com/glurge/allgood.asp).
>
> But what do I do now? It’s not like I can actually debunk this, since she never _says_ it’s true… and I don’t want to hurt her feelings.
>
> Help!
While this particular story didn’t happen, I did do that same exercise in a high school religion class (Catholic Schol), and I do still have mine somewhere.
Anyway, since she never says it’s true, she’s probably passing on what she thought was a nice story. If you don’t want to receive bulk e-mail, tell her so politely. If you don’t mind recieving it, then I don’t see the need to say anything at all, since it’s not being passed off as a true story.
---
### Author:  [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)
#### Post date: [October 23, 2005, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-the-glurge/327433/6 "2005-10-23T18:58:07Z")
Am I missing something here? Everyone’s response seems to indicate that they put this in the category of “never happened”, but the Snopes link provided by **Kythereia** gives the status of the story itself as “True”, although the one quoted here is heavily edited from the original.
I never, ever pass glurge along. I hate getting them and never pass up the opportunity to debunk as necessary (just debunked a “call #677”, in fact), but the main part of this one isn’t debunkable.
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### Author:  [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)
#### Post date: [October 23, 2005, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-the-glurge/327433/7 "2005-10-23T19:40:37Z")
For the most part, I don’t see the benefit for debunking glurge.
Granted, most of the glurge I get these days comes from people whom I know who are new to the internet and think that the stories about little Johnny and his post-card collection are new and moving. I think most internet users above a certain intelligence go through a glurge stage. They usually will grow out of it. (If not, maybe you need a better quality of friend? Huh? Why do you ask what do I do on my Friday nights? I stay in, but what does that have to do with anything?)
If they’re passing on glurge of a dangerous nature - with information that’s just plain wrong or dangerous I’ll send a Snopes link, but that’s it.
---
### Author:  [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)
#### Post date: [October 23, 2005, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-the-glurge/327433/8 "2005-10-23T20:15:32Z")
My mother was an overachieving middle-school teacher (Louisiana’s Teacher of the Year 1991). At the end of every school year, she would hand write a two-page letter to each student and told them what she liked about them and what they could accomplish with their strengths. She wrote close to 100 letters and it took up a lot of the beginning of the summer.
This was in a poor, rural area and many of the students didn’t turn out that well. There were some that turned out to be robbers, rapists, and murderers. However, I can’t count the number of times that one of her students ran into her and mentioned their special letter even years later. One night she got a call from prison. One of her students doing time for rape was able to make a phone call and he picked her to talk to. They became pen-pals after that.
If the story in the OP isn’t true, it could be and it contains a powerful, true message. It certainly doesn’t rank with most glurge out there.
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### Author:  [@Mama\_Tiger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Tiger)
#### Post date: [October 23, 2005, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-the-glurge/327433/9 "2005-10-23T21:03:45Z")
As glurge goes, this is one that actually doesn’t bother me nearly as much as some.
Lately, unfortunately, I’ve been inundated with glurge of the cute-puppies-kittens-flowers-you’re-so-special type of crap. It’s sent mostly by a sweet elderly lady I know who is, unfortunately, a cute-puppies-kittens-flowers-adorable-grandchildren person. The glurge is so sticky sweet it makes my teeth hurt, but I don’t have it in me to tell her to stop sending it. So I just send it to trash and try to think no more of it.
The idiot who keeps putting me on his list for his reactionary political crap, however, I write and politely tell him that I’m simply too busy for extra emails. And he actually does remove me from his list. For a while. (I’m listkeeper another list with him wherre I do actually need to receive mails from him, or he’d go to my permanently blocked list, as apparently he has with many others on the list.) He seems to have about a three-month memory span; then it’s rinse and repeat. I wonder if he’s ever figured out WHY most of the people he knows won’t accept email from him any more? :wally
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### Author:  [@Ruby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruby)
#### Post date: [October 23, 2005, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-the-glurge/327433/10 "2005-10-23T21:24:09Z")
When my mom died, I had several friends send sappy glurge. I know their intentions were good so I just ignored them.
However, if I get another “swifter wet jet causes cancer in family pets” I think I’m gonna hurl. When I get one of those, I “Reply to All” with the Snopes link so fast your head will spin.
Lather, rinse, repeat.
Soon, no more glurge!
All is well.