# Fight to the death: which animal team would you choose? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 4, 2014, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325 "2014-07-04T05:47:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Fishtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ed655f/32.png) [@Fishtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fishtar)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2014, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325/41 "2014-07-05T15:13:11Z")
> [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](#): > > If I can flood the area, I want sharks! > Sharks with frikkin lasers on their heads! If your sharks get lasers, then my falcons get hand grenades…(talon grenades?). ---
**Author:** ![shijinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cc9497/32.png) [@shijinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shijinn)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2014, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325/42 "2014-07-05T15:30:31Z")
no weapons! no capes! ---
**Author:** ![Lorene89095](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@Lorene89095](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lorene89095)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2014, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325/43 "2014-07-05T15:46:53Z")
Dogs. My choice of breeds,but at least 2 JR Terriers ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2014, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325/44 "2014-07-05T16:30:28Z")
> [@shijinn](#): > > no weapons! no capes! No Krypto? ---
**Author:** ![shijinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cc9497/32.png) [@shijinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shijinn)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2014, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325/45 "2014-07-05T18:23:51Z")
No CAPES!! ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2014, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325/46 "2014-07-05T19:20:17Z")
I’ll take piranhas. With the area deep enough to to allow them to swim, most land animals would be at a distinct disadvantage. Land mammals would not be used to fighting against fish, have reduced mobility, and find their reaction times against water-based creator too slow. The larger the opponent, the better. Bring on the elephants! ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2014, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325/47 "2014-07-05T20:07:51Z")
Since my first choice (honey badger) has been taken (a few times), I’ll go with Komodo dragon instead. ---
**Author:** ![Absinthe\_Anecdote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f6c823/32.png) [@Absinthe\_Anecdote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Absinthe_Anecdote)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2014, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325/48 "2014-07-05T20:11:33Z")
> [@TokyoBayer](#): > > I’ll take piranhas. With the area deep enough to to allow them to swim, most land animals would be at a distinct disadvantage. Land mammals would not be used to fighting against fish, have reduced mobility, and find their reaction times against water-based creator too slow. > > The larger the opponent, the better. Bring on the elephants! I only skimmed the rules in the OP a couple of days ago, but just why do your precious piranhas get the advantage of fighting in water? As for me, I’ll go with dogs, or bees… or the dogs with bees in their mouths and when they bark they shoot bees at you. ---
**Author:** ![bldysabba](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecccb3/32.png) [@bldysabba](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bldysabba)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2014, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325/49 "2014-07-05T21:13:11Z")
> [@Absinthe\_Anecdote](#): > > I only skimmed the rules in the OP a couple of days ago, but just why do your precious piranhas get the advantage of fighting in water? Yeah, I think the only sensible way of doing it is land vs land, or water vs water. Taking any animal and putting it in another’s element is just auto lose. ---
**Author:** ![TonySinclair](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/49beb7/32.png) [@TonySinclair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TonySinclair)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2014, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325/50 "2014-07-05T22:10:20Z")
> [@shijinn](#): > > ahem - [National Geographic](http://video.nationalgeographic.com/video/news/jaguar-attacks-crocodile) Wow. I had no idea that jaguars were such badasses. Stealth and power. Kind of reminds me of myself. ---
**Author:** ![detlep](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dbc845/32.png) [@detlep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/detlep)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2014, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325/51 "2014-07-06T03:18:45Z")
I’ll take a jaguar. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2014, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325/52 "2014-07-06T03:56:46Z")
> [@Absinthe\_Anecdote](#): > > I only skimmed the rules in the OP a couple of days ago, but just why do your precious piranhas get the advantage of fighting in water? From reading the thread. Rather novel, I’m sure. > [@shijinn](#): > > i was thinking just sand to keep it simple, but for fun, let’s change it so the terrain will adjust accordingly. waters will rise just enough to accomodate the height of your water-dwelling creature. > [@Absinthe Anecdote](#): > > As for me, I’ll go with dogs, or bees… or the dogs with bees in their mouths and when they bark they shoot bees at you. Read the OP. ---
**Author:** ![Absinthe\_Anecdote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f6c823/32.png) [@Absinthe\_Anecdote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Absinthe_Anecdote)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2014, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325/53 "2014-07-06T04:40:00Z")
The dogs with bees in their mouth was a Homer Simpson quote… ---
**Author:** ![Tamerlane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tamerlane/32/7602_2.png) [@Tamerlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tamerlane)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2014, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325/54 "2014-07-06T05:01:19Z")
> [@zoid](#): > > OP says 1 kg minimum individual weight. [Black mambas](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_mamba) easily go over 1 kg, are ridiculously fast ( for a snake ) and extremely toxic. One took down an elephant - it took a day to kill it, but it went down more or less immobilized long before then. An elephant’s worth of black mambas would take one out easy-peasy. ---
**Author:** ![Absinthe\_Anecdote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f6c823/32.png) [@Absinthe\_Anecdote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Absinthe_Anecdote)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2014, 11:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325/55 "2014-07-06T11:34:33Z")
Can we make Michael Vick fight a pack of pit bulls? Better yet, how about having Kesha fight Pit Bull? Also, I’d like to see Little Jerry Seinfeld fight, but I’m not sure about his opponent. ---
**Author:** ![shijinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cc9497/32.png) [@shijinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shijinn)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2014, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325/56 "2014-07-06T12:32:16Z")
with the water amendment, it’s hard to see what could defeat piranhas in their element. could a bird cherry pick them at leisure? ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2014, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325/57 "2014-07-06T14:50:25Z")
> [@shijinn](#): > > with the water amendment, it’s hard to see what could defeat piranhas in their element. could a bird cherry pick them at leisure? [Maybe not](http://www.nature.com/news/video-fish-leaps-to-catch-birds-on-the-wing-1.14496). ---
**Author:** ![Octarine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/22d042/32.png) [@Octarine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Octarine)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2014, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325/58 "2014-07-06T17:47:46Z")
Thick swarms of disease-ridden mosquitoes. ETA: And even if they’re fighting against something aquatic, all that means is the water lets them breed. Mwah-ha-ha-ha . . . ---
**Author:** ![Toxylon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f05b48/32.png) [@Toxylon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Toxylon)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2014, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325/59 "2014-07-06T21:38:00Z")
> [@shijinn](#): > > can snakes even get through the elephant’s skin? i wonder which of these fair best against snakes: elephants. rhinos or hippos. The skin on the tip of an elephant’s trunk is soft and thin enough for large venomous snakes to bite through. I understand this is a real threat to browsing elephants. Rhinos and hippos have an advantage here. ---
**Author:** ![Namkcalb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c89c15/32.png) [@Namkcalb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Namkcalb)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2014, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325/60 "2014-07-06T21:57:10Z")
Well, if you allow presumed extinct animals, then I’d like a swarm of velociraptors. They are basically pack-hunting killer chickens with wickedly sharp claws. If you count humans as aquatic… which if crocodiles and hippos are, we deserve to be, then I’d pick a group of humans. Not due to their leathality mind you, but I’d love to how well a honey badger does submerged under 5 foot of water. If you decide to tell Namkcalb to stop twisting the rules, then I’d like a pack of spotted hyenas. As they have good teamwork, experience with a wide range of prey sizes and strong bites [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fight-to-the-death-which-animal-team-would-you-choose/692325.md?page=4)