# Find me the cringiest artist on the web **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 11, 2007, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675 "2007-04-11T18:34:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2007, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675/41 "2007-04-11T22:45:55Z")
Aren’t they holding him down prior to the arrival of some as yet unseen chap with a big axe and a hood? ---
**Author:** ![IrreverentTone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@IrreverentTone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IrreverentTone)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2007, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675/42 "2007-04-11T22:53:39Z")
You all need to put away your religious dabblings because I have found [_Deeper than Spiritual_](http://www.fradetfineart.com/linkdeeper.htm) which is by far the finest wall art I have ever seen. **And** this charming piece “features two original leaves from the fall of 2005”. Right clicking on any image on the site will assure you that this superior artist knows her Berne Convention rights, in case you were getting any ideas. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2007, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675/43 "2007-04-11T23:03:21Z")
[QUOTE=Tapioca Dextrin] Aren’t they holding him down prior to the arrival of some as yet unseen chap with a big axe and a hood? [/QUOTE] One can but dream. Meanwhile, back in the same pretty little village we have [Jesus on the cross](http://www.durand-gallery.com/pages/level_2/new/witness.html), with a giant sideways disembodied head dangling over Him - a post-Salome John the Baptist, I’m thinking, based on the previous painting and **ryobserver** ’s analysis. Also, I perceive that Jesus is bleeding suspiciously from the crotch, besmirching (or blessing) the placid waters. Or is that John’s blood, touching the Messiah suggestively on His winkie? Now I’m thinking that these two paintings actually make a pair - a before and after, with a lot of sexual tension going on, all stuck in the mud at the seafront in Sussex. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2007, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675/44 "2007-04-11T23:33:52Z")
[QUOTE=Tengu] Oh, man, I misread that as ‘Jesus the bugger’ and clicked expecting something a lot more interesting than that… [/QUOTE] I got your “Jesus the Bugger” [right here.](http://www.quitsearching.com/images/mysins.jpg) As proof, it comes from a place called [“the gayest place on Earth.”](http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Content?oid=100742) ---
**Author:** ![SmartAleq](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smartaleq/32/163_2.png) [@SmartAleq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAleq)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2007, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675/45 "2007-04-11T23:39:01Z")
[QUOTE=jjimm] In In laying down the gauntlet, I challenge you to find worse than [Incarnation](http://www.durand-gallery.com/pages/level_2/new/incarnation.html). (Warning: has a man’s winkie in it, so though it’s art, it may be NSFW if you’re John Ashcroft.) Strangely, the winkie seems to be emanating some sort of floating tendrils, which are raining down a golden shower on the Christ-figure’s head. He appears to be scooping it up in a cup, or perhaps playing the tambourine. Or is the youth being born? If so, why is the birth fire flowing up his knob? [/QUOTE] Speaking of winkies, the loincloth wearing guy appears to have a substatial “interest” in floating barenaked winkie guy. I’m seeing homoerotic porn masquerading as religious art here, people. On preview, no it could **not** be any more gay! :o :eek: 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Terrifel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c68b51/32.png) [@Terrifel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terrifel)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2007, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675/46 "2007-04-11T23:41:12Z")
[QUOTE=Tuckerfan] I got your “Jesus the Bugger” [right here.](http://www.quitsearching.com/images/mysins.jpg) [/QUOTE] From out of the shadows, Ninja Jesus claims another victim. "\*Nails?! \* You like to nail things up, do you? Well let’s see how well you can hammer in those nails _after I reach into your torso and tear out your heart!"_ Warning: The sight of nails makes Ninja Jesus crazy. ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2007, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675/47 "2007-04-12T01:24:26Z")
[QUOTE=jjimm] I choked on my wine. That’s fucking _brilliant_. I am seriously considering buying it. [/QUOTE] Does **WriterChick** know what evil you’re considering allowing to enter your house? :eek: For my nomination, this bit of [political art](http://www.wga.hu/frames-e.html?/html/e/everding/caesar/birthfre.html) comes to mind. ---
**Author:** ![Quiddity\_Glomfuster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/c4cdca/32.png) [@Quiddity\_Glomfuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quiddity_Glomfuster)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2007, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675/48 "2007-04-12T01:34:56Z")
[QUOTE=SmartAleq] Speaking of winkies, the loincloth wearing guy appears to have a substatial “interest” in floating barenaked winkie guy. I’m seeing homoerotic porn masquerading as religious art here, people. On preview, no it could **not** be any more gay! :o :eek: 😃 [/QUOTE] Not only that, but take a look at the photo of Durand [here](http://www.durand-gallery.com/pages/about.html) and tell me that all those blonde wispy JCs aren’t self-portraits of him when he was younger (and wishful enhancement to picture how he wishes he looked). ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2007, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675/49 "2007-04-12T01:53:16Z")
[QUOTE=Quiddity Glomfuster] Not only that, but take a look at the photo of Durand [here](http://www.durand-gallery.com/pages/about.html) and tell me that all those blonde wispy JCs aren’t self-portraits of him when he was younger (and wishful enhancement to picture how he wishes he looked). [/QUOTE] For some reason, I’m not seeing any photo. ---
**Author:** ![Hunter\_Hawk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/50afbb/32.png) [@Hunter\_Hawk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hunter_Hawk)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2007, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675/50 "2007-04-12T01:58:14Z")
It’s the [best pinata ever!](http://homepage.mac.com/cparada/GML/000Free/002Contemporary/001Durand/source/16.html) ---
**Author:** ![cornflakes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9d8465/32.png) [@cornflakes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cornflakes)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2007, 7:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675/51 "2007-04-12T07:36:25Z")
[QUOTE=capybara] I submit an historical example, by the artist I loathe most of all, William Holman Hunt, [the Hireling Shepherd](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/8/86/William_Holman_Hunt_001.jpg) Everything he does makes me shudder. I want to just slap him and Ford Maddox Brown around a bit. [/QUOTE] Is he really reaching around the woman to get to the sheep? ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2007, 8:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675/52 "2007-04-12T08:00:49Z")
[QUOTE=Jahdra] This sculpture is just wrong, on so many levels. May not be SFW. Or anyone, really. [Link](http://cgi.ebay.com/Good-vs-Evil-OOAK-Sculpt-by-HollywoodFairies-Studio_W0QQitemZ280103060785QQihZ018QQcategoryZ84626QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem). Scroll all the way down for the full effect. [/QUOTE] Boy nothing gets me hotter than a good fairy with a bare boob, and a beer gut. ---
**Author:** ![Colophon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f05b48/32.png) [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2007, 11:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675/53 "2007-04-12T11:37:15Z")
[Bad art, on a plate](http://reigninggifts.com/plates.htm). Maybe not really art, but I had to share the top one on that page (“Life of Jesus- Christian Catholic 3D Collectors’ Plate”). Unfortunately, I keep on seeing it as a clock. (Still only ten past ten?) 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Il\_Palazzo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Lord\_Il\_Palazzo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Il_Palazzo)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2007, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675/54 "2007-04-12T12:49:46Z")
his is Durand guy is a gold mine of bad. [This lovely offering.](http://www.durand-gallery.com/pages/level_2/1996_2000/woman_clothed_in_sun.html) The face of the guy on the right makes it. [This one may or may not be safe for work](http://www.durand-gallery.com/pages/level_2/new/mystic_lamb.html)Naked kid with a creepy evil face sits on a (possibly mystic) sheep. What can you possibly say about it? ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2007, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675/55 "2007-04-12T15:27:22Z")
[QUOTE=Lord Il Palazzo] Durand guy [/QUOTE] What IS up with this guy?! He may not have the single worst piece of art on the internet, but as a collection he can’t be beat. Why all the strangely religiosexual themes? I want to know, dammit! It’s like Boris Vellejo on a bad cocktail of communion wafers, Viagra, and acid. ---
**Author:** ![dangermom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e274bd/32.png) [@dangermom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dangermom)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2007, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675/56 "2007-04-12T17:00:11Z")
Why hasn’t anyone yet posted those scary freaky big-eyed paintings? ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2007, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675/57 "2007-04-12T17:57:40Z")
[QUOTE=Lord Il Palazzo] \[This one may or may not be safe for work](http://www.durand-gallery.com/pages/level_2/new/mystic_lamb.html)Naked kid with a creepy evil face sits on a (possibly mystic) sheep. What can you possibly say about it? [/QUOTE] In **Didling** , Sussex, no less. :eek: Durand likes painting winkies. I don’t think we need to look a lot further than that. I would like to nominate [Trisha Romance](http://www.artandnature.com/romance.html). She’s Canada’s answer to Thomas Kinkade, and she’s dead serious - you can’t go into an art shop in Canada without seeing her stuff everywhere. Glurge on canvas, man. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2007, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675/58 "2007-04-12T18:08:08Z")
[QUOTE=featherlou] I would like to nominate [Trisha Romance](http://www.artandnature.com/romance.html). [/QUOTE] The eternal question: Her paintings are crap but she’s hot. Y’know, I blew this once before and I don’t intend to do it again. I can put up with crappy paintings for an evening. ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2007, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675/59 "2007-04-12T18:40:39Z")
[QUOTE=featherlou] I would like to nominate [Trisha Romance](http://www.artandnature.com/romance.html). [/QUOTE] They look like sappy greeting cards, but they don’t make you question her sanity like Durand’s art. She should do a nude self portrait series. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2007, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675/60 "2007-04-12T21:52:17Z")
[QUOTE=Waverly] They look like sappy greeting cards, but they don’t make you question her sanity like Durand’s art.\ [/QUOTE] Well, it might if I bought one, but I get your point. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/find-me-the-cringiest-artist-on-the-web/399675.md?page=4)